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The Five-Minute Voyager FAQ

by Zeke

Q: What is Five-Minute Voyager?

It's a humour website that publishes parodies of the popular Star Trek franchise and diverse other material.

Q: What does the "five-minute" part mean?

The idea is that each parody on the site condenses an hourlong TV episode to roughly five minutes in length. The actual length varies, of course. See the Statement of Purpose for the full explanation.

Q: Why 5?

Partly for a reason explained in the Zeke FAQ, and partly just because five minutes is often used as a metaphor for a short period of time. ("Aw, honey, just five more minutes...")

Q: What shows does the site cover?

All six Star Trek series, Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda, Farscape, and assorted episodes of other shows under the banner "Sci-Fivers." Also included are parodies of videogames and Shakespearean plays, along with some top ten lists and a series of articles from the fictional newspaper This Just In.

Q: If you have all that material, why does the name only mention Voyager?

Because the parodies only covered Voyager at first. After about a year, the other series appeared and started playing an increasingly large role, but by then the Five-Minute Voyager name had recognition value. The 5MV Nomenclature Poll settled the issue.

Q: 5MV?

Five-Minute Voyager. It's one of the abbreviations that have entered the site's vocabulary, along with "fiver" for a five-minute parody and the use of "five" as a transitive verb. (Note: It's not FMV. That's Full Motion Video.)

Q: How is the site organized?

5MV consists of ten "subsites" (such as Five-Minute Enterprise and Sci-Fivers) which share a common look-and-feel but are essentially sites unto themselves. There are also four "departments" (News, About, Features, and Links) which are common to all the subsites.

Q: Who runs 5MV?

The creator and webmaster, Zeke. Some of the updates and HTML work are handled by Kira, 5MV's site manager. Rounding out the staff are Marc Richard, IJD GAF, and Derek Dean (who are also section heads).

Q: Who does what?

Zeke regularly parodies Enterprise. Marc, IJD, and Derek run the Next Generation, Original Series, and DS9 subsites respectively, making frequent updates. Kira contributes to many of the subsites and helps with organizational work.

Q: I want to write a fiver. What do I do?

Glad you asked! Read the Submissions FAQ.

Q: Who do I contact to make a comment or complaint?

If it's a general site issue, Zeke or Kira. If it's about a specific subsite, the section head (listed on the subsite's front page).

Q: How do I contact you?

Each of these mnemonic aliases points to the current mailbox of the staffer in question....
Zeke zeke@sci-fivers.com.ar
Kira kira@sci-fivers.com.ar
Marc Richard marc@sci-fivers.com.ar
IJD GAF ijdgaf@sci-fivers.com.ar
Derek Dean derek@sci-fivers.com.ar

Q: Can I link to your site?

Absolutely. I never turn down a link. There are link buttons in the Links section you can use if you like. And thanks, by the way.

Q: Will you link to my site?

Did you actually look at that Links section?

Q: Okay, then can I be a link of the day on the News page?

Probably not -- most of my links of the day are to sites I've already known for a while and enjoyed or found useful. But you're welcome to ask. Write me and I'll visit your site.

Q: What is 3Sygma?

It's one of the servers run by Owen Jacobson, a good friend of Zeke's. Five-Minute Voyager has been here for most of its lifetime, even outliving the host site itself (Owen's taken down the main 3Sygma page in favour of his new site, mx-deus.net).

Q: What is sci-fivers.com.ar?

It's an alias for 5MV's normal URL. Unlike a mirror site, the alias doesn't keep independent copies of the site's files, but simply loads the 3Sygma copy in a full-screen frame. It's just an easier address to remember.

Q: Why does sci-fivers.com.ar have an Argentina extension?

Because the reader who gave it to me lives there. He generously continues to pay for it and configure the email aliases.

Q: Who designed the graphics?

All site graphics were designed and created by Zeke, though he's enlisted others to help here and there.

Q: Does 5MV have a mailing list for site updates?

Indeed it does. Send Zeke or Kira an email with "update list" in the title and you'll be added right away.

Q: What's Five Minute Voyager's motto?

Veni, vidi, contraxi -- or, translated from the original Latin, "I came, I saw, I reduced to a considerably shorter length."

Got a question you think should be in this FAQ? E-Mail it to Zeke.

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All material © 2002, Colin Hayman.