October 17 & 18

[Zeke]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Here are "Impulse (../enterprise/impulse.html)" and "Exile (../enterprise/exile.html)," as teased. I'm declaring this both Friday's and Saturday's update, because I'm going to get onto that damn earlier-in-the-day schedule if it kills me.[/color:post_uid0]

[Michiel]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I can't open them. Looks like they're not on the server yet, because the URL looks right.[/color:post_uid0]

[Celeste]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I'm getting the same problem.. Fix it Zeke!!!! I need fivers to liiiiive!!!

Edit: I found them on Trektoday (http://www.trektoday.com) Now when they least expect it.. I make my getaway![/color:post_uid0]

[Katy Jane]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]maybe actualy uploading them to the site is sunday's update  ;)  (pleeease dont hurt me)

Incidently in the mean time you can read them at trek nation here (http://www.treknation.com/reviews/fiver/exile.shtml) and here (http://www.treknation.com/reviews/fiver/impulse.shtml)

Edit 1: to add the links
Edit 2: Oops i didnt see your edit Cele, now lets see if i can find a reason for a third edit  :p
Edit 3: just for the heck of it.[/color:post_uid0]

[evay]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I wanted to read them here, but I can't wait for the UL (life is short! ), so I went to Trek Nation. The Klein bottle joke has got to be one of the absolute best I've ever seen in a fiver. :lol: Kudos!

Now upload the stupid fivers already so I can come back and contribute to the hit count![/color:post_uid0]

[catalina_marina]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]the stupid fivers[/quote:post_uid0]
Sacrilege! ;)

[quote:post_uid0]Archer: Actually, Phlox is about to leave too. He's making some sort of house call for this creepy L.A. law firm.[/quote:post_uid0]
Nice catch. :D

[quote:post_uid0]Archer: I'm sure Travis will understand.
Sato: Aha! The real Captain Archer would never mention Travis!
Tarquin: Okay, I admit it -- I'm not very good at impersonating people.[/quote:post_uid0]
Indeed :D

[quote:post_uid0]T'Pol: That's odd. Power just went out all over the ship.
Archer: Rats! I knew we shouldn't have used the same hydroelectric system as the northeastern United States.[/quote:post_uid0]
:D

[quote:post_uid0]Computer: Warning: reactor overload in fifteen minutes. There will be no audio warnings, including this one.[/quote:post_uid0]
Heh.

Great fivers, even though they're not uploaded yet. :)[/color:post_uid0]

[Zeke]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]<span id='ME'><center>Zeke swears incoherently</center></span>

I was [b:post_uid0]so[/b:post_uid0] sure I uploaded them... all the other Enterprise pages were uploaded...

They're up now. Sorry for the delay.[/color:post_uid0]

[FatMatDuhRat]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I've had to read the new [b:post_uid0]ENT[/b:post_uid0] fivers on the [b:post_uid0]TrekToday[/b:post_uid0]
website also, but that's no big deal at all since I used
to frequently read them there first & then pop over
here to the [b:post_uid0]5MV[/b:post_uid0] website in order to see what everyone
has to say about them on the Forum.

Here are my favorite lines [b:post_uid0]Exile:[/b:post_uid0]

[b:post_uid0]Phlox:[/b:post_uid0] My scans show nothing unusual, Ensign. You're healthy -- and sexy.
Can I get a, [b:post_uid0]"HELL YEAH!" ?[/b:post_uid0]

[b:post_uid0]Reed:[/b:post_uid0] It's no good, sir -- we can't go any farther. We've already taken more
damage than we can believably repair by next week.
That guy has never watched [b:post_uid0]Voyager[/b:post_uid0] before, has he?

[b:post_uid0]Tarquin:[/b:post_uid0] Would you at least reconsider the slinky dresses you keep wearing?
Can I get a, [b:post_uid0]"HELL NO!" ?[/b:post_uid0]
:D

And a few from [b:post_uid0]Impulse:[/b:post_uid0]

[b:post_uid0]Archer:[/b:post_uid0] T'Pol, wait here with Hawkins and try not to go any insaner.
[b:post_uid0]T'Pol:[/b:post_uid0] I resent that. Know what else I resent? Parmesan twilight.
Maybe she should try some cheddar instead.

[b:post_uid0]T'Pol:[/b:post_uid0] Sweet holy SURAK, I need a fruit pie!
[b:post_uid0]Archer:[/b:post_uid0] Okay, I don't want to shoot you, but I grill. Arrgh, now you've got me
doing it.
:lol: That joke had me crying!

I also liked the [b:post_uid0]Ship of the Dead[/b:post_uid0] reference.
Excellent job [b:post_uid0]Z! *thunderous applause*[/b:post_uid0][/color:post_uid0]

[NAHTMMM]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Reed: We've located the Seleya. It's surrounded by asteroids which are apparently flying drunk.
Mayweather: That's the first thing they tell you not to do in flight school! Boy, does that get me madd.[/quote:post_uid0]
Heehee.

[quote:post_uid0]Archer: Any luck communicating with that Vulcan we captured?
T'Pol: He wasn't too clear about what happened, but apparently it had a lot to do with brains.[/quote:post_uid0]
:D

[quote:post_uid0]T'Pol: No! You're just gleaming to shut me upsilon! You've always evaporated Vulcans, right from the start! Sweet holy SURAK, I need a fruit pie![/quote:post_uid0]
:lol: Hilarious gibberish!



[quote:post_uid0]Sato: That doesn't answer my question at all!
Mysterious Voice: I wouldn't be much of a mysterious voice if I did.[/quote:post_uid0]
:lol:

[quote:post_uid0]Archer: I figured. Porthos's water dish just got twisted into a Klein bottle and he wants me to tell him whether the water's inside or outside it.[/quote:post_uid0]
:lol: :lol: What a goofy mental image!

[quote:post_uid0]Sato: Stock sci-fi clips... proof of President Clark's misdeeds... nothing useful... EEP! Xindi!
Tarquin: Awww, you saw one? All I've gotten so far is this big eye that just stares at me.[/quote:post_uid0]
Heheheh. "Captain Cool the Coolster"? Silly stuff.[/color:post_uid0]

[Derek]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Captain's Starlog: Hoshi's back. So's Phlox, who keeps complaining about some kind of bite he got while he was away.[/quote:post_uid0]
Four weeks from now on an all new Enterprise....

I was surprised to see Billingsly on Angel. I wasn't aware he was making a guest appearence.

Great fivers, Zeke. As always.[/color:post_uid0]

[Katy Jane]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Great zeke :D and two in one day 8| wow[/color:post_uid0]

[Kira]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0][b:post_uid0]Tarquin:[/b:post_uid0] What do you see?
[b:post_uid0]Sato:[/b:post_uid0] Stock sci-fi clips... proof of President Clark's misdeeds... nothing useful... EEP! Xindi!
[b:post_uid0]Tarquin:[/b:post_uid0] Awww, you saw one? All I've gotten so far is this big eye that just stares at me. [/quote:post_uid0]

*snirk* Great, now I need a LotR fix.

[quote:post_uid0][b:post_uid0]Sato:[/b:post_uid0] I will. Tell all my friends and Phlox I'll miss them.
[b:post_uid0]Archer:[/b:post_uid0] Actually, Phlox is about to leave too. He's making some sort of house call for this creepy L.A. law firm.
[b:post_uid0]Sato:[/b:post_uid0] Really? Tell him to say hi to Wesley for me in ancient Coptic. [/quote:post_uid0]

Note to self: obtain latest Angel episode. (Lousy packed Thursday night television and lack of WB affiliate....)[/color:post_uid0]

[mudshark]

[quote:post_uid0="NAHTMMM"][color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Archer: I figured. Porthos's water dish just got twisted into a Klein bottle and he wants me to tell him whether the water's inside or outside it.[/quote:post_uid0]
:lol: :lol: What a goofy mental image![/color:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]
[color=#000000:post_uid0]Ah, but is it a [i:post_uid0]Lego[/i:post_uid0] Klein bottle? ;)
[quote:post_uid0]T'Pol: Well, before we decide, let's get to the bridge so we can repatriate weasels.
-----------
T'Pol: Okay, okay. I can be calm. I can [i:post_uid0]BADGERS![/i:post_uid0] be calm.
[/quote:post_uid0]
Mustelidae roam. ;)
[quote:post_uid0]Archer: T'Pol, we killed that zombie two minutes ago. You can stop kicking it in the crotch any time now.
T'Pol: Ex-boyfriend.
[/quote:post_uid0]
Heh. BRAAAAAIIINS! :D
[quote:post_uid0]Sato: [i:post_uid0]There and Back Again: A Tbohbi's Holiday?[/i:post_uid0]
[/quote:post_uid0]Heh heh heh.
[quote:post_uid0]Sato: Unless you try to keep me here like some Roman dictator.
[/quote:post_uid0]
Or a Bluebeard. ;)[/color:post_uid0]

[Tate]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Great job, Zeke.

Loved the Tolkien references. Â :D

I also liked:
[quote:post_uid0]Archer: Hi! Good news: we're leaving you here for the rest of the mission.
Sato: What? I don't even get to say goodbye to my friends and Phlox?
Archer: I'm sure Travis will understand.
Sato: Aha! The real Captain Archer would never mention Travis!
Tarquin: Okay, I admit it -- I'm not very good at impersonating people.[/quote:post_uid0]

Keep up the good work. Â :)[/color:post_uid0]

[taya17]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]T'Pol: Not yet. Maybe I'll remember his voice.
Vulcan Zombie: BRAAAAAAAAAAAINS!
[/quote:post_uid0]

This reminds me of that KillFrog cartoon about the castrated dog.... has anyone else seen that?

[quote:post_uid0]T'Pol: You FOOL! You incompetent pitchfork! [/quote:post_uid0]

:howls: I have a new insult to add to my repertoire!

[quote:post_uid0]"Phlox": Will you feel more comfortable if I take a human form like this?
Sato: Depends... can you do Marcus Cole?
[/quote:post_uid0]

Oh great, now I'm not going to be able to pay attention to my lectures for the next hour and a half! :D

[quote:post_uid0]T'Pol: That's odd. Power just went out all over the ship.
Archer: Rats! I knew we shouldn't have used the same hydroelectric system as the northeastern United States.
[/quote:post_uid0]

WAHAHAHAHAHA!


:wipes eyes: Zeke, those were great fivers. I especially loved all the LotR references and all the (underhand) B5 references. Great job! :)[/color:post_uid0]

[Zeke]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I'm shocked, Taya! For two fivers running you've seen [i:post_uid0]Pirates of the Caribbean[/i:post_uid0] references that weren't there, and now no comment on the one I did on purpose? :D[/color:post_uid0]

[taya17]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Okay Zeke, two things to get straight.

One: My name is 17. [i:post_uid0]17[/i:post_uid0], remember? I'm shocked. I thought you, as a DCer, would know. ;)
Two:
[quote:post_uid0]Sato: Aw. I was hoping for pirates with a big chest of cursed gold or something.
[/quote:post_uid0]
Hmm, this looks like a PotC reference to me. I must be hallucinating again....

There, happy now? :lol:[/color:post_uid0]

[NeoMatrix]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Watch out Zeke, she might come after you for not calling her 17.[/color:post_uid0]

[Sa'ar Chasm]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Geographically, she'll have to get through me first.

*crosses fingers*[/color:post_uid0]

[taya17]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0="Sa'ar Chasm"]graphically, she'll have to get through me first[/quote:post_uid0]
:blinks:
Oh, that said GEOgraphically. Whoops :D[/color:post_uid0]

[Opium]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Not only are they funny, but Impulse makes for a great translated-on-Google mess![/color:post_uid0]

[Marc]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Archer: If I let you go off stun, I'd have to let Reed go off stun. That's a precedent I really don't want to set.

Mayweather: 1.2 kilograms mined. 1.21 kilograms mined. 1.22 --
Tucker: You don't have to report every few seconds.
Mayweather: I'm making the most of this piddling little B-plot. You would too if it were all you had.

Hawkins: Yeah, it's not like Vulcans would ever be savage.
Reed: (down the hall) Aaaaaa! Not there! Stop it!
T'Pol: Indeed not.

Archer: T'Pol, we killed that zombie two minutes ago. You can stop kicking it in the crotch any time now.
T'Pol: Ex-boyfriend.

Sato: Really? Tell him to say hi to Wesley for me in ancient Coptic.

T'Pol: (over the comm) Captain, the anomalies are increasing as we approach the sphere.
Archer: I figured. Porthos's water dish just got twisted into a Klein bottle and he wants me to tell him whether the water's inside or outside it.

T'Pol: All spheres are the same shape as a water polo ball.
Archer: It's still worth noting. [/quote:post_uid0]

Good stuff -- including those painfully funny kicking jokes in "Impulse".[/color:post_uid0]