Manifesto for the campaign to get a new topic title thread

[e of pi]

Rallying words to get those who have been wronged to rise up in their summarized anger to damand their rights as FM.net Forum Posters. Rules for the campaign consisting of, essentially, 1. Do it anyway, and say you'll stopp when Zeke creates a new topic title thread. 2. If anyone gets threatened with banningor if Zeke asks us to stop, everybody stops. Request for feedback.

[Opium]

But...but...we have something longer and much more pointless than Topic Title...we have...The 3 by 1 story! (cue patriotic campaign music)

However, for years now,
There has been no Topic Title
Oh, there have those
That come very close
And are wonderful
A-Q is always a riot,
And how can you not love
The Person Above You.
1 by 1 has grown to 3;
And now there's even 5-8
And alphabet too!
But for so long,
people have craved,
And want it.
Oh so badly.
Those who haven't had it.
Those who have only heard.
Those even who remember it.
All crave it.
All want it.
All want...
TOPIC TITLE.

[e of pi]

Reminder that this drone never had the joy to post in Topic Title, as well as a request as to whether that was a support or rejection.

[Opium]

Reminder that this drone never had the joy to post in Topic Title, as well as a request as to whether that was a support or rejection.

*still playing patriotic music*
It said
All Want.
Because
All Want
Topic Title
Back.
It was support.
For bringing back
Topic Title.

:D

[e of pi]

Indication of joy at second demonstration of support.

[whoiam]

I have to say, it sounds like a particularly pointless way of wasting time and increasing people's post counts.

So count me in :wink:

[e of pi]

Indication of joy at the third demonstration of support.

[KillerGodMan]

w00t!

Count me In!

[MaverickZer0]

Why not? We have other pointless post-count increasing threads, so Topic Title would be a welcome zombie.

I meant addition. Yeeesss.

[danieldoof]

make it 6 then
I would love to try out topic title :D

[PointyHairedJedi]

If there were a Son of Topic Title, I don't think I could support it - you just had to be there, dammit.

Crazy times, man, crazy times.

[NeoMatrix]

Bringing it back will kill the wonderful memories. It's like remaking a classic movie so the younger generation can enjoy it more with better special effects.

However, I would like to add my support

[KillerGodMan]

It's like re-making Star Wars

Only Greedo is NOT shooting first!

[Chancellor Valium]

I would prefer to find the first one first. It must be possible...It MUST! At least in part, to recreat the feel of the first one, at least!

[e of pi]

I doubt it. But it could be reimagined! With new skins, better SFx, and seemingly random gender changes!

[Chancellor Valium]

I doubt it. But it could be reimagined! With new skins, better SFx, and seemingly random gender changes!

The counsel against resurrection rests, m'lud.
:P

[PointyHairedJedi]

Hey, there's absolutely nothing to stop you lot from coming up with something new, rather than just digging up old corpses.

Dammit, there's this line now that I can't quite recall from The Simpsons episode "Lisa the Iconoclast" (where she discovers that Jebediah Springfield was actually Hans Sprungfeld, villianous pirate).

[e of pi]

True, but still...

[whoiam]

hmm... I wonder what would happen if we gave Zeke one of those seemingly random gender changes?

[e of pi]

Look, it was a bad BSG reference okay? Not that that wouldn't be kinda interesting to see.

[Zeke]

hmm... I wonder what would happen if we gave Zeke one of those seemingly random gender changes?

I've got a better idea where we never find out, ever.

[whoiam]

hmm... I wonder what would happen if we gave Zeke one of those seemingly random gender changes?

I've got a better idea where we never find out, ever.

Uhhh... sure! Exactly what I was gonna say... Quick, e of pi - hide the pizza cutter and the Eastrogen pills!

[Naki]

Topic title must return. I shall conjure it forth from the depths of hell!

heh added The monkey paw game to Ninpocho Chronicles. They took to it quickly

[e of pi]

I must say, though it is sporadic in nature, it is fun.

[PointyHairedJedi]

I've got a better idea where we never find out, ever.
I dunno - Zeke with boobs has a certain... appeal.


*Crosses off entry no. 73 on the List Of Things Pointy Never Ever Thought He'd Actually Say*

[Katy Jane]

bouts of laughter at PHJ's post. Fond memorys of topic title, mixed feelings about a revival.


Hey, it was a lot of fun, but like pointy said, you had to be there, i just don't think a new topic title would be the same. :(

[Zeke]

I dunno - Zeke with boobs has a certain... appeal.

Jedi, the line you are walking is razor-thin.

It's really more like a laser.

[PointyHairedJedi]

Is the laser attatched to a shark?

[Zeke]

Indirectly. It's attached to a helicopter which is being piloted by a shark.

[whoiam]

See, this is why my imagination should be a banned substance...

[Chancellor Valium]

There *must* be a copy of Topic Title somewhere. Didn't you keep a backup of the forum, or the original itself with you then, Zeke?

There must be dozens of web archives...*stupidly vows to find the original Topic Title or give up in failure*

When was the thread made?

[Katy Jane]

The closest thing i've ever gotten on the way back machein was the front page of the forums showing that the most recent post in misc was in topic title.

The tread was started before i joined in augustish 2002


Edit: Linky http://web.archive.org/web/20021210031232/http://3sygma.com/cgi-bin/forums/ikonboard.cgi

[Chancellor Valium]

Hm...That could prove tricky.

[Vedra]

Zeke with boobs? Wouldn't it be stranger to imagine him without them?

[Vedra]

(Wow, I'm so gonna pay for that later, but it was worth it.)

[Chancellor Valium]

(Wow, I'm so gonna pay for that later, but it was worth it.)

I'm afraid inflation means the going value is two bricks of gold-pressed latinum.

[whoiam]

(Wow, I'm so gonna pay for that later, but it was worth it.)

I'm afraid inflation means the going value is two bricks of gold-pressed latinum.

Or 7 pints of blood and your choice of 2 limbs...

[Zeke]

(Wow, I'm so gonna pay for that later, but it was worth it.)

You asked for it, chum. Tell Nate I sent you.

[e of pi]

Who the heck is Nate?

[Vedra]

Chum? Did you just call me shark bait?

[Zeke]

Who the heck is Nate?

Nate the Great, now Infinite Improbability -- the original bearer of Vedra's new title. And so shall it be handed on to all who piss me off.

[Vedra]

Change my title back, Zeke. I'm not kidding. Don't make me go Kung Fu Hustle on your ass!

[e of pi]

Note to self: do not piss off Zeke.

[PointyHairedJedi]

^ You're just learning this now?

I was going to ask what kind of helicopter, but then my brain took a left turn at Alberquerque, and now I'm going to instead post a picture that will quite possibly cause your puny brains to explode as a result of its' sheer awesomeness.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v136/PointyHairedJedi/shark/shark-helicopter.jpg

[danieldoof]

erm .... that scares the sh.. out of me right now

thank god that we in berlin dont have those helicopters

[PointyHairedJedi]

It's fake, of course, but it started off a whole meme over at b3ta.com with some hilarious results. Observe:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v136/PointyHairedJedi/shark/frickinlasers.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v136/PointyHairedJedi/shark/dimension2.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v136/PointyHairedJedi/shark/real0.jpg

[Zeke]

Change my title back, Zeke.

On which grounds -- that you're still a girl, or that you're already a woman?

[PointyHairedJedi]

I think it would be prudent at this juncture to reccomend that we never speak of Innaproriate Zeke Chestage again; in fact we should probably add it to the list, where it can sit next to such luminaries as Multiple Exclamation Marks and Pointless Enterprise Bashing.

Agreed?

[Katy Jane]

Second!

[Zeke]

Vedra's title is back to normal. I think he's learned his lesson. Well, I don't really, but it's the thought that counts.

[e of pi]

. . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . ._
In that case, this place is -(V2).

[Chancellor Valium]

I think it would be prudent at this juncture to reccomend that we never speak of Innaproriate Zeke Chestage again; in fact we should probably add it to the list, where it can sit next to such luminaries as Multiple Exclamation Marks and Pointless Enterprise Bashing.

Agreed?

Do we have to?
:P

BTW, what is the law on multiple smilies?

[e of pi]

You mean like this? :?: :twisted: :shock: :lol: :? :P :wink: :D

[Chancellor Valium]

No: multiple versions of the same one...

[e of pi]

Oh!!! So like this :?: :?:

[Chancellor Valium]

Dude, if I were you, I'd remove those extra exclamation marks, and sharpish ;)

Yes, like that.

[e of pi]

Nahh...

[Chancellor Valium]

Nahh...

Do you *want* to incur Zeke's wrath?

[e of pi]

Ya know, on second thought...

[KillerGodMan]

I'm missing something

WHAT exactly was TV's member title changed to?

[Zeke]

"Not a girl, not yet a woman."

See, all he needs is time. A moment that is his. While he's in between.

[e of pi]

Let this be a lesson to you.

[Chancellor Valium]

Let this be a lesson to you.

Let this be a lesson to all of us!

Run for your deaths!

[e of pi]

In that case, I'll stay right here.

[Chancellor Valium]

Wise drone.

[whoiam]

Yeah... if I gotta die, I'm going to do it in the one place where I'm truly happy - where my computer is :lol:

[Chancellor Valium]

...Surrounded by geekographists?

:P

[e of pi]

And my growing collection of plastic greeblies.

[Chancellor Valium]

And my growing collection of plastic greeblies.

Provided they're all mimsied right, I don't mind.

What the Chattanooga Choo-Choo are "greeblies"?

[e of pi]

Sorry. Term for small plastic bits attatched to models to provide the illusion of detail and structures smaller than reliably renderable.

[Chancellor Valium]

Sorry. Term for small plastic bits attatched to models to provide the illusion of detail and structures smaller than reliably renderable.

I see.

[Zeke]

What The Chattanooga Choo-Choo --

I like your style, Valium. (Except for the capital T.)

[e of pi]

Pardon me boys...

I used to love that song.

*whistling*

[Chancellor Valium]

What The Chattanooga Choo-Choo --

I like your style, Valium. (Except for the capital T.)

I'll edit :)

edith: Edithed :). Halfway through my green eggs and ham, in Carolina, Zeke-I-Am-Not-Quite ;)

[Xeroc]

What The Chattanooga Choo-Choo --

I like your style, Valium. (Except for the capital T.)
All Hail The Infinite Title Case Of A Sentence! ;) :P :D

[PointyHairedJedi]

Pardon me boys...

I used to love that song.

*whistling*
Used to? Heathen!

The one permanent folder on my MP3 player is that of Glenn Miller numbers. Also, have a link (http://www.petpresident.com/beneke_dhs.html) (mudshark pointed that one out to me - Bob Aul is his no-good beatnik brother - or perhaps it was the other way round? :P ).

[e of pi]

Pardon me boys...

I used to love that song.

*whistling*
Used to? Heathen!

The one permanent folder on my MP3 player is that of Glenn Miller numbers. Also, have a link (http://www.petpresident.com/beneke_dhs.html) (mudshark pointed that one out to me - Bob Aul is his no-good beatnik brother - or perhaps it was the other way round? :P ).

Well, I would still liusten to it, but I couldn't find it.

[Chancellor Valium]

Pardon me boys...

I used to love that song.

*whistling*
Used to? Heathen!

The one permanent folder on my MP3 player is that of Glenn Miller numbers. Also, have a link (http://www.petpresident.com/beneke_dhs.html) (mudshark pointed that one out to me - Bob Aul is his no-good beatnik brother - or perhaps it was the other way round? :P ).

Heheheh.

[catalina_marina]

So here I was, trying to find some Topic Title thread, for a friend who didn't get my Topic Title reference. Then I found this. At first, I thought it was one of those old Topic Title topics, but then I looked at the date. There was some surprise. When I read on, though, I realized this is not actually a Topic Title thread. More like a thread about Topic Title. One of those perfect sp-- creative posting threads. That said...


Wonder about latest topic of Topic Title thread.

[Chancellor Valium]

Welcome back comment, followed by expression of hope that last poster will continue to post more. Expression of regret that this poster did not know Topic Title personally. Bemoaning of the lack of backup of the thread.

[catalina_marina]

Who the heck is Nate?

Nate the Great, now Infinite Improbability -- the original bearer of Vedra's new title. And so shall it be handed on to all who piss me off.
Commonwealth? :roll:

[Chancellor Valium]

Who the heck is Nate?

Nate the Great, now Infinite Improbability -- the original bearer of Vedra's new title. And so shall it be handed on to all who piss me off.
Commonwealth? :roll:

Ahh, the eyes, they burn!

[catalina_marina]

Surprise about Valium not liking Andromeda. Request for fire, rope, and something to tie Valium to.

[Chancellor Valium]

Surprise at catalina's belief that I dislike 'Andromeda'. Hasty statement to the contrary. Request for knife and water.

[catalina_marina]

Shock about Valium waving a knife around. Flight.

[e of pi]

RPG reference involving rolling dice to see if Cat is sucsessful. Dice ends up balanced on one corner, defying odds.

[catalina_marina]

Laughter about RPG reference. Remark about pluralness of "Dice".

[Hejira]

That's what he meant by the defiance of odds.

[Chancellor Valium]

Confusion about impression of catalina's that this poster is waving a knife around. Correction that it is used for cutting bonds only. Look of shock.

[Hejira]

Grasp of conversational technique. No contribution of remote significance.

Pause as the word 'knife' registers.

[Lostoyannaya]

Well, after reading these three very intriguing pages...I still have no idea what's going on :cry: I fear I am turning normal again.

~~Lostoyannaya :wink:

[Hejira]

Normal?

Egads, we're losing her! Quick, someone get the unnormalification raybeam generator gun thing!

Yes, the URGGT.

[Naki]

On a semi unrealted note, I have spread the madness...

That's right, I started topic title on Ninpocho Chronicles and there is nothing Zeke can do about it. So for all those who really miss it Join Ninpocho!

---Ninpocho G.O.D. out---

[MaverickZer0]

Look of discouragement. Reminder of what happend with original Topic Title. Prodding remark indicating same thing may happen to Ninpocho. Question of fellow poster's sanity.

[danieldoof]

suggestion of chat with cat...
regret about bringing it up

act of hiding in corner and awaiting punishment

[Lostoyannaya]

On a semi unrealted note, I have spread the madness...

That's right, I started topic title on Ninpocho Chronicles and there is nothing Zeke can do about it. So for all those who really miss it Join Ninpocho!

---Ninpocho G.O.D. out---

Jean, I think he's trying to assimilate us all.

And on another semi-unrelated note.....what the frell was Topic Title, and why is it so sorely missed? :shock:

~~Lostoyannaya :D

[MaverickZer0]

Topic Title is the spawner of all game threads here. If that weren't evil enough, it got to an incredibly massive (for the server then) size. it was addictive.
The way people have been posting in short, clipped segments? That's Topic Title format.

(Also, if you do sign up at NC, say Tsuki Hayasa sent you. Enough people have been sent by him, dammit, I want the recommend bonuses.)

[Naki]

Yeah there have been enough, but no one ever tells Ryoma T_T so I don't get money

[Chancellor Valium]

Remark of confusion at strange method of posting of other posters. Comment to the effect that Maverick's post excessively negative. Expression of amusement that losty has not asked about TT before.

[Lostoyannaya]

Remark of confusion at strange method of posting of other posters. Comment to the effect that Maverick's post excessively negative. Expression of amusement that losty has not asked about TT before.

Indignation of one's most magnificent name being reduced to a mere "losty". Misunderstandment of strange posting habits. Pleasement at making up two new words.

~~Lostoyannaya :wink:

[Chancellor Valium]

Apology for name shortening. Explanation of it's use due to ease of spelling and speed of use. Amusement at last poster's inventive portmanteau-ing of words. Displaitification of this poster's own ability in said field. Smiley depicting amusement.

[Naki]

General feeling of joy. Excitement due to discovery of money. Crazy Ninja Dance

[Chancellor Valium]

Bemused smiley. Request for more information on 'Crazy Ninja Dance'. Superfluous mention of Kalamazoo.

[Naki]

Explanation of Crazy Ninja Dance. Crazy Ninja Dance Part 2.

[MaverickZer0]

Explanation of this poster's negativity. Remark that this poster has always been negative. Feigned interest in Crazy Ninja Dance.

[Lostoyannaya]

Wonderment of used disambiguous voices. Conclusion that posters have somehow become members of the freak Y Continuum. Planment of CV to join. Shock of discovery of identity as Rain Goddess. Request to takeover Donnert und Blitz department. Further wonderment of the tangent of original post.

~~Lostoyannaya :mrgreen:

[Chancellor Valium]

Confusion over attempts to assimilate this poster into Y Continuum. Refusal to comply. Sound of this poster's TARDIS dematerialising, with him on board.

[Naki]

Relief that Zeke has not seen this yet. Continuation of Crazy Ninja Dance. Offer to teach Crazy Ninja Dance to Valium

[MaverickZer0]

Suggest possibility of Zeke finding out anyway. Realization that self would be in trouble as well. Resignation of current situation. Pulling out of umbrella.

[Chancellor Valium]

Exhortation of all present to relax. Explanation of SEP field around building. Declination of offer to teach CND. Charleston dance instead.

[MaverickZer0]

Expression of relief at SEP field. Explanation of what it is to others. Congratulating Valium on thought.

[Lostoyannaya]

Rage at posting disability. Questioning of existence of said SEP field. Mild remark of scientific impossibilty. Reel of slap to the face. Threats to rain on everyone. Incredulity of how many people carry around umbrellas.

~~Lostoyannaya-san :mrgreen:

[Chancellor Valium]

Statement of thanks to Maverick. Irritation at Lostoyannaya for nearly breaking SEP field. Request for gaffer tape to be brought forth.

[e of pi]

Clear, concise, humorous, and convincing review of the awesome new movie Akeelah and the Bee. Statement implying pastry distribution to those who attend.

[Chancellor Valium]

Statement to the effect that e is telling falsehoods. Suggestion that all eat drink and be merry instead. Rousing speech on rights for lobsters.

[MaverickZer0]

Disagreement with e regarding movie. Assertion that all should see V for Vendetta instead. Carrying of anti-vegetable-murder sign.

[Lostoyannaya]

Incredulity of sanity of form. Request for bulldozer to be bought forth post-haste. Conviction that said movie does not exist. Correction that House of Flying Daggers is best movie ever. Quick run to the gun shop to buy gun in self-defence.

~~Lostoyannaya

[catalina_marina]

Remark about reading 5MV forum when laughing hurts.

[mudshark]

Query concerning whether or not hurts do, in fact, laugh.

[Nate the Great]

I just read all of those years-old threads. I hope you know who I am and any of my assorted aliases by now.

Why isn't my forumname Nate the Great? Long long LONG story...

[mudshark]

Invitation to stick to format.

[catalina_marina]

Notion that II should, apart from sticking to format, also tell the story.

[MaverickZer0]

Seconded poking of previous poster. Reminder to tell story. Statement about time not being valuable enough to waste as it is worthless. Settling back in chair. Grabbing of popcorn.

[Katy Jane]

Shock at the existince of thread. Dancing.

[e of pi]

Shock that this thread has been brought back to life. Several lame jokes about necromancy. Rolling of eyes on the part of readers of post.

[Nate the Great]

Yes, it's the Night of the Living Thread! Oooohhh...

No idea what the format of this thread is supposed to be. Enlighten me.

The Story of Infinite Improbability
or Why One Name Isn't Good Enough For Nate the Great

Let's step into the Wayback Machine (I had to steal the keys from Mr. Peabody, boy is he gonna hate me in the morning. Which morning, however, I have no idea... ;)) and go back in the far mists of ancient time, when 5M.Net was still 5MV and I was the impressionable age of eighteen. Trust me, I graduated with Highest Honors and I still knew almost nothing about the real world. I had no personal computer at home and had to sneak time on my dad's computer, go to the library, or use a kiosk at my college, the University of Minnesota (Go Gophers!). The days of my Hotmail account had yet to dawn. The only websites I went to with any consistency were h2g2.com (this was before the bbc.co.uk takeover, if that matters to anyone), startrek.com (this was when I actually thought important stuff happened in the world of Trek on a daily basis), and Five-Minute Voyager. Come to think of it, I forget what the URL was for this site back then. I had been using Nate the Great as a nickname for certain of my more eccentric friends in high school for years, but online I went by Infinite Improbability. Why? The first username I created was for h2g2, and of course if you gotta create a name for a Hitchhiker's Guide site you need a Hitchhiker's Guide name, right? Of course! So obvious! I registered for the Five-Minute Voyager forum using the only online name I was using at the time, Infinite Improbability. Of course in later years I started using Nate the Great again, especially when I started fiving. So that's the story. Is everyone asleep yet?

[e of pi]

Jolt to awakeness, then elucidation that in this thread, the content of the post is described, rather than actually wirtten out in long form.

Example using previous post. (Now technically, I'd leave it there if this were an actualy thread, I think, but here I'll actually elaborate):

Continuation of necromancy and zombie jokes. Request for explanation of thread. Long story about days of old.

[mudshark]

Suggestion of terms "gerund assemblage" or "noun phrase" as short descriptions of possible Topic Title-type structural schemes.

[Tate]

Interjection that the URL ‘back then’ may have been www.3sygma.com/fiveminute (http://www.3sygma.com/fiveminute) or www.scifivers.com. (http://www.scifivers.com.au/)some_other_two_letters_I_can’t_remember_now or some such. Admission of ignorance and/or forgetfulness of the URL before those.

[Hejira]

Note that the last two letters were an 'A" and an 'R' in that order. Random, lame joke involving refetrenced URL and pirates.

[Nate the Great]

Yeah, 3sygma! Consider me another of the easily amused by the simplistic beauty of a number and it's Greek mirror image.

Was scifivers.com.ar ever the main site, or was it just a mirror?

That's a silly format. Summarize what you would've said? You want to talk using sentences that are prefived for everyone else's convenience?

[PointyHairedJedi]

Random statement to the effect that cheese is a Good Thing.

[mudshark]

Agreement with statement preceding.

Agreement with note two before that one about the letters 'A' and 'R'.

[MaverickZer0]

Affirment of Cheese being good. Joy at possibly making up new word.

Exhortation that ninjas are better than pirates.

[Nate the Great]

Arguement that ninja pirates are better. "Hi-yar!" :)

[Hejira]

Ponderance on what would be the result of a ninja and a pirate mating.

[Nate the Great]

Reply that there are such things as female pirates and ninjas.

Reminder of Elektra.

[Katy Jane]

Agreement with the cheese things.

Comment on scifivers url being a redirect to the 3sygma url.

[Nate the Great]

Query if people have seen the Kid Radd Power of Cheese strip.

[Katy Jane]

negitive response to NtG's question

[e of pi]

Speculation that a ninja/pirate mating would result in something that goes Hi-Yargh. Much rolling of eyes by readers.

[catalina_marina]

Random statement to the effect that cheese is a Good Thing.
Random statement that "cheese" is "shite" in Hungarian. (Or pronounced that way, anyway)

[catalina_marina]

<a href="http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Ninja_Pirate_Zombie_Robot">Link of a kolwiki page on Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot.</a>

[PointyHairedJedi]

Exhortation that ninjas are better than pirates.
Link (http://drmcninja.com/page.php?pageNum=1&issue=2) proffered as proof of above statement accompanied by much vigorous nodding.

Random statement that "cheese" is "shite" in Hungarian. (Or pronounced that way, anyway)
Speculation as to the quality of Hungarian cheese phrased in a humourously offensive manner.

[catalina_marina]

Laughter at above joke.

[MaverickZer0]

Reminder to all poster that ninja vampires would be even more awesome. Disappointment at own laziness in lack of linkage to proof.

[Nate the Great]

Emphasis that the hi-yar/hi-yargh joke has already been made.

[MaverickZer0]

Pointing out that since vampires and ninjas are both inherently cool and pirates are not, ninja vampires would be infintely cooler than ninja pirates. Further lamenting at fact linkage reains unfound.

[Nate the Great]

A query of why pirates are not inherently cool.

[MaverickZer0]

Reminder that all pirates do is sail around and get drunk in addition to lousy singing. Assertion that they are not on the same level as ninjas and should instead be compared to chimps. Reminder that ninjas never died of scurvy.

[Nate the Great]

Assertion that stabbing and neck chops can be just as painful as scurvy.

Joke that if pirates do drink all the time then they would have to sail in circles. "Hey, didn't we just pass that coral reef two hours ago?"

[Chancellor Valium]

Statement concerning pirates in fact being dead fish. Request for more dried frog pills. Expression of exasperation under strain of trying to find a spoon.

[Nate the Great]

Query of why you'd need a spoon to eat pills.

[Chancellor Valium]

Reply to effect that spoon is not required to eat pills. Spoon in fact required for eating ice cream. Further explanation that said spoon may or may not exist. Curses against name of Schrodinger. Ditto against The Matrix.

[Nate the Great]

Query if Vroomfondel is the correct spelling. Query if he's your favorite hyperintelligent pan-dimensional being.

[Chancellor Valium]

Confirmation that Vroomfondel is correct. Response of preference of Majikthise.

[Nate the Great]

Rejoiner that Vroomfondel is superior, if only because of "we demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!"

[PointyHairedJedi]

Offer to supply said Dried Frog Pills. Statement regarding Chancellor Valium's inexplicable habit of transmogrifying into various members of the family elephantidae seemingly at random. Insane laughter.

[mudshark]

General comment on Frog Pills.

[Nate the Great]

General disgust of the notion of frog pills. What do you do, store those next to the poisoned dragons liver?

Pop quiz for knowers of the reference.

[Chancellor Valium]

Admonishment of Inf/Imp's ignorance of Dried Frog Pills. Reminder that Time Lords do not transmogrify into elephantidae. General comment on waveform of spoons. Request for uncertainty. Demands for cyanide-coloured curtains. Even more insane laughter.

[Gatac]

Statement that topic participants are all nuts.

Admission that entity himself is also nuts.

Content sigh, followed by authorization to continue current line of discussion.

Gatac

[catalina_marina]

Gratitude for permission.

Accusation of Valium for aping PHJ.

[mudshark]

Reminder that both are British.

[MaverickZer0]

Pointing out that insanity is to be expected here. Mentioning of several threads for evidence.

Musing over now-dead chat. Lamenting. Suggestion of funeral.

[Nate the Great]

You mean a FUNeral.

Did my lameness make anyone faint? ;)

[Chancellor Valium]

Statement of inappropriate form of above post.

Expression of irritation at catalina_marina. Explanation that spoon are melting.

Request for Quantum Uncertainty readout.

[mudshark]

Expression of surprise at finding that spoon are plural.

Supposition that the preceding may be addressed in the Quantum Uncertainty readout.

[Chancellor Valium]

Repeated expression of surprise at finding spoon are plural.

Explanation that only possible explanation be Quantum Uncertainty.

Repeated request for Quantum Uncertainty readout, hold the mayo.

[Nate the Great]

Query as to why an undead thread needs to stick to an arbitrary format.

[Chancellor Valium]

Response to the effect that tradition is a strong force, and that, for example, 'The Person Above You Game' is not played by talking about yourself...

[Nate the Great]

Response that strictly sticking to a tradition can lead to silly and/or absurdly idiotic behavior. Case in point: a person who always parted their hair on the left because that's how their mother's did it, then discovered that their hair was right-oriented all the time and looks better that way.

[Chancellor Valium]

Retort that this is in part the point.

[Nate the Great]

Expression of forlorn submission. Observation that retorts can be very psycologically scarring.

[Chancellor Valium]

Explanation that this is due to lack of cow level.

[AKAArzosah]

Expression of extreme confusion, accompanied by much manic grinning. Query as to correctness of post format.

[mudshark]

Confirmation of post-format correctitude.

[AKAArzosah]

Expression of gratitude at confirmation of correctitude. Inclusion of word 'dude' to continue alliterative effect. Ducking of expected blows to the head.

[mudshark]

Blowing-up of unexpected ducks.

[AKAArzosah]

Throwing of bits of duck at equally unexpected Spanish Inquisition.

[mudshark]

Observation that nobody, of course, expects the Spanish Inquisition.

[MaverickZer0]

Counterobservation that some do expect it. Further observation that no one truly expects the Spammish Repetition.

[mudshark]

Skeptical pause (http://www.dailywav.com/0103/dontknowme.wav)...

[Chancellor Valium]

Observation that in either case, the floor is no longer observed, and thus does not exist.

[AKAArzosah]

Observation of floor, initiating spontaneous re-existance. Failed attempt to throw oneself at re-existed floor and miss. Brief two-letter expression of pain.

[Nate the Great]

Challenge to go an entire page without starting responses with "observation" or "counterobservation."

[MaverickZer0]

Challenge refused. Reminder that things are not supposed to be planned. Celebration of randomness.

[Nate the Great]

Shooting of celebratory balloons.

[MaverickZer0]

Admonishment at shooting. Argument that swords are better. Further argument that there are more balloons.

[Nate the Great]

Spraying of latex-specific acid all over room. Maniacal laughter as every single balloon in the room dissolves and pops on cue, covering the forum in balloon confetti.

Huge electro-magnet used to snatch every sword in the room. Huge smelting equipment used to turn them into commemorative coins.

[MaverickZer0]

Reminder that guns are metal also. Pointing out that guns were smelted also. Pulling out of plasma sword. Reminder that not all swords are metal.

[Chancellor Valium]

Length, Proust-esque description of act of hefting Demat Gun. Observations upon usefulness of said Demat Gun. Lengthy description of junking of Demat Gun. Description and reflection upon superior nature as weaponry of teaspoon and open mind.

[Nate the Great]

Sigh of boredom. Query of what further purpose the guns had, thus query of why they COULDN'T be melted.

Request for the specs of a plasma sword that don't involve at least some metal.

[e of pi]

Detailed specifications fror such a weapon, including links to websites with information. Apologies for specs and links both being in the language of the Lost Tribe of Hamara, which has been untranslatable for hundreds of years.

[Nate the Great]

Arrival of a time-traveler from the 29th century, bringing a translated version of the specs, including a red circle around the thingamajobber, which was always thought to be a ceramic alloy but does in fact contain unobtainium, which is metal and quite meltable.

[Chancellor Valium]

Grandiloquent speech regarding need for such knowledge not to be discovered. Lengthy explanation of following requirement for time-traveller to never willen-mayan-on-happen-be-to existed. Proustian description of deletion of said person. Erasure of memory of above poster(s).

Exhortation to be surrounded by fat men with sleek heads who sleep o' nights. Explanation regarding lean and hungry appearance of yond Cassius. Extrapolation that said person thinks too much. Further addendum regarding such men as dangerous.

[Nate the Great]

Request for fewer ten-dollar words.

[mudshark]

Query regarding an apparent bias against ten-dollar (5£?) verbiage.

[Nate the Great]

Boring expository explanation yielding what appears to be actual facts but is really a terse command to look it up yourself. :)

Authorial chuckle followed by a shrug. Boring expository explanation about the term being related to an old child's game that turns words into dollar values (the letter "a" is worth a cent, "b" is two cents, etc. and that the value of the word is merely the sum of the values of the letters). A further lecture about how "ten-dollar word" merely means a LONG word.

[AKAArzosah]

Query as to possibility of any word in the english language or otherwise actually adding up to ten dollars based upon the previous poster's stated values.

Suggestion someone not as lazy as myself examine 'antidisestablishmentarianism'.

[Nate the Great]

Statement that it's called "hyperbole." Further statement that the ten dollar figure is just that, a figure, not an actual cost estimate. Joke that perhaps given current inflation rates, the value of an "a" has jumped far above the one cent mark.

[AKAArzosah]

Clarification that previous post was a joke. Random change of current intra-topic topic due to overabundant insanity caused by fish heads. Explantion of fish heads comment. New topic set as: flibbitigibbet. Apologies for apparent lack of logic. Continued insane ramblings interspersed with mutterings of 'kill all'.

Revelation of occupation as postal worker.

[Nate the Great]

Revelation of occupation as sane worker. Winces at the total lack of laughs at that joke.

[AKAArzosah]

Expression of thanks for use of raspberry jam, instead of toe.

Emphatic proclamation of much confusion at repeated instances of attempted post turning up in wrong place. Fearful expression of hope at it working this time. Decision to give up if not.

Also, retaliation with rocket-propelled Snow-Cone launcher.

[AKAArzosah]

Much frustrated screaming. Repeated reckless use of multiple exclamation marks. Request for all readers of this post to scroll up and realise that I apparently somehow retaliated against Nate BEFORE he launched jam at me.

Repetition of frustrated screaming. Repeated repeated multiple repeated multiple exclamation marks.





Righto, sorry to break the posting mode but WHAT IS GOING ON HERE? Is anyone else seeing what is wrong here? Somebody help me please before my brain implodes AGAIN. FOR THE SECOND TIME.

[Zeke]

Testing for forum bugs. If I don't edit to indicate otherwise, the test succeeded.

[AKAArzosah]

Addition of post for no reason other than to post. Further emphasis on occupation as POSTAL worker.

Continued homicidal-like muttering. Replacement of 'Kill all' with 'Kill Nate' because... well just BECAUSE.

[Nate the Great]

Takes aim with jam jar launcher. AKAArzosah jammed, raspberry of course.

[Tate]

Observation of out-of-order posting phenomenon. Speculation of temporal anomaly effecting forum. Comparison to Paneldemonium. Much fond reminiscing and feelings of nostalgia.

Clarification that anomaly might be affecting forum. Attempted justification that, somehow, 'effecting' was the right word despite all grammatical evidence to the contrary.

[Nate the Great]

"Zeke, Zeke! I have to go back!"
"Back where?"
"To the future!"
"Oh, don't worry about that, the forum bug will bring it here soon enough. You want some quiche?"

I know, I know, it's a little late for that gag but between work and sleep I've been indisposed for most of the last day or so. Just stick it ten or so posts back and pretend that the bug did it.

[AKAArzosah]

Expression of joy at return to what passes for normalcy around here.

Thwapping of Nate with a Mackeral for innapropriate post format.

[mudshark]

Offer of large halibut to AKAArzosah.

[Nate the Great]

Direction to visit All Too Flat for all your halibut needs.

[mudshark]

Retrieval of halibut; thwapping.

[Nate the Great]

Retrieval discovered to be impossible, as Nate already sold the fish. Queries of motive yield the response, "Oh, just for the halibut."

[AKAArzosah]

Changing of subject to: not fish. Discussion-initiating comment.

[MaverickZer0]

Discussion-continuing comment. Further delving into discussion. Verbal pondering on asparagus.

[mudshark]

Stated lack of enthusiasm for asparagus as topic. Proposal of cauliflower (fresh) as alternative subject.




Thwapping.

[AKAArzosah]

Agreement to cauliflower as subject. Addition of cheese to discussion. Mmm-ing.

[mudshark]

Approval of cheese addition. Consumption of cheese.

[AKAArzosah]

Indignation at theft of cheese. Bringing of more cheese. Brandishing of shotgun at attempted cheese stealers.

[AKAArzosah]

Thread-reviving comment. Offer to share cheese, if it's REALLY necessary. Putting away of shotgun.

[MaverickZer0]

Declination of cheese. Proffering of crackers to those who want them. Shame at being able to spell 'declination' and 'proffering' on first try but having to retype crackers. Admittance that poster is not going to be an English major.

[AKAArzosah]

Laughing out loud at MavervickZero. Reassurance that 'Crackers Don't Matter'.

[Chancellor Valium]

Further reassurance that Arzosah is crackers.

[AKAArzosah]

Agreement. Mad cackling.

[MaverickZer0]

Jabbing at previous poster for using formality of full sn. Further jabbing for misspelling said formality. Admonishment not to edit post so all can see what current poster means. Throwing of pie.

[AKAArzosah]

Giving of double and triple apologies, with cherries on top. Query as to preferred shortening of name.

Wiping of pie off face. Resistance of urge to retaliate, as face-pie was deserved.

[Chancellor Valium]

Vindication of apples.