[color=#000000:post_uid0]When in danger, and in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.

Thank you.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]If it's brown, drink it down. If it's black, send it back.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]!

Where'd you dig that up? I've been saying that for years, along with:

Ours is not to reason why, ours is but to scream and die - motto of Starfleet Security

The voices in my head tell me I'm sane.

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

"Normal" is a setting on a washing machine.

And other trite witticisms.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]War is like a party. If you're not invited, look for another one or start one yourself.

An absolute monarchy is one in which the sovereign does as he pleases, so long as he pleases the assassins.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.

You can go anywhere you want in an office if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail.

Keep your shoulder to the wheel, your eye on the ball, your ear to the ground, and your nose to the grindstone. Now try to work in that position.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]I thought this might happen. ::facepalms::[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Don't wait your turn to fight the hero. Attack en masse.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]If you find a half full, ancient looking bottle of Coke in a machine shed, don't drink it, it's engine oil. Believe me, I know.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Don't drink engine oil. ;)[/color:post_uid0]

[quote:post_uid0="Celeste"][color=#000000:post_uid0]I thought this might happen. ::facepalms::[/color:post_uid0][/quote:post_uid0]
[color=#000000:post_uid0]I'm personally following your first words of wisdom ;)[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Two wrongs make a right, three rights make a left, four lefts make a circle, and five circles make the symbol for the Olympics. This is not necessarily signifigant.

[quote:post_uid0]Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.[/quote:post_uid0]
There's one I've read somewhere. "Stel niet uit tot morgen wat je vandaag door een ander kunt laten doen." Ahem. Don't put off until tomorrow what you can make someone else do today.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]You can always tell a Dutchman, but you can't tell him much.

Cats were once worshipped as gods. They have never forgotten this.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]You can always tell a Dutchman, but you can't tell him much.[/quote:post_uid0]
The same goes for Americans. I don't know about Canadians yet. ;)[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]If brute force doesn't work, you're not using enough.

Be kind to other people. We outnumber you six billion to one.

I am only racist if stupid qualifies as a race.

I have the Body of a God. Unfortunately, it's Buddha.

The purpose of time is to keep everything from happening all at once. It's not working.

If it ain't broken, keep playing with it.

In spite of what you may have heard, it is permissible to yell "FIRE!" in a theatre, particularly if the theater is on fire.

A good plan shouldn't be abandoned just because it violates a few natural laws.

There are thre erors in this sentence.

If you took all the students that felt asleep in class and laid them end to end, they'd be a lot more comfortable.

Poverty is inconvenient, try to avoid it.

Jesus Loves You. Â I Don't. Â Get Out Of My Way.

Die, my dear doctor? That's the last thing I shall do.

Wizard's First Rule: People are stupid - Zedd (Sword of Truth, Book 1)

Communication has changed so rapidly in the last 20 years, it's almost impossible to predict what might occur even in the next decade.
E-mail, which now sends data hurtling across vast distances at the speed of light, has replaced primitive forms of communication such as smoke signals, which sent data hurtling across vast, distances at, uhhh, the speed of light.

Killing your opponent(s) is half the battle, surviving is the other half.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy and go well on crackers.

Witches Guild parking: Violators will be toad.

The universe, with one trifling exception, consists solely of others.

Two most common elements in the universe: Hydrogen and Stupidity.

Famous last words: "What red dragon?"[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]If brute force doesn't work, you're not using enough.[/quote:post_uid0]
I think I already covered that one, Gringar.

I used to be schizophrenic but now we're ok.

Do not meddle in the afairs of wizards, for thou art combustible and conduct electricity.

Heard about the dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac? He lies awake all night wondering if there's a dog.

Oh, I do have a life. I just never use it.

A wise man once said, give a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day. Light a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

I have an inferiority complex, but it's not a very good one.[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Get a life? Where can I download one?

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the weekend.

Meddle not in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee on your keyboard.

Keyboard not found. Think F1 to continue.

Error reading file: (A)bort, ®etry, (I)nfluence with large hammer

KlingonDOS: Strike any user to continue

* - tribble . - shaved tribble _ - tribble near a Klingon
__*_*_*) - trib-boggan[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0][quote:post_uid0]Get a life? Where can I download one?[/quote:post_uid0]

Reminds me of:

A life? What is that? Is it blue? Is it edible? Does it run on Linux?[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]Give someone a fish, you feed him for one day. Teach him how to fish, and you lose a steady customer. - Ferengi Rule of Acquisition nr. 208 (I think).[/color:post_uid0]

[color=#000000:post_uid0]If it's a Rule of Acquisition, wouldn't it be "Sell a man a fish..."?[/color:post_uid0]