Top Ten dark secrets of 5MV forumgoers
10. Opium: Secretly prefers Coca-Cola to opium
9. Admiral Sab: Is actually Brad Pitt's niece
8. Hotaru: Makes a good living selling access to Rick Berman's voicemail
7. Nic Corelli: Was last seen in the company of the governor of New Jersey
6. Pointy-Haired Jedi: Failed his first Jedi Master exam
5. Sa'ar Chasm: Is actually Brad Pitt's niece
4. NAHTMMM: Screen name doesn't stand for anything, damn it
3. Mudshark: Is a red shirt in real life
2. Zeke: Keeps a secret FMV forum in which he makes all the comments and all the responses
1. Scooter: Cries like a baby, every time, at the end of "Tapestry"
Next: Top Ten Things Spock Invented in his Spare Time
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