[Sa'ar Chasm]

Chloe: Now it's time to sneak down to the ubiquitous school basement where the ubiquitous school furnace resides.
Florida Audience: My school doesn't have either of those things.
Chloe: Shut up! They're ubiquitous, I tell you! Ubiquitous! Now I'm going to light things on fire.

I'm pretty sure the schools in Abbotsford or Langley or wherever they film this show don't have them either.

(One day earlier (just in case you thought we'd start off with Chloe acting crazy without explanation))

I'd rather have an explanation as to exactly who Chloe is. Lana I know is Lana Lang, Clark's Smallville love interest as established in the comics. Also, ever notice that all Superman's girlfriends have the same initials?

Gardener: There's a dead body there beneath all that fertilizer.
Lex: Crap.
Gardener: Call it what you like

Potty humour? Derek, that was offal. Urinal lot of trouble, mister.

Clark: Um, huh? I'm not going to the prom.
Evil Mwahaha-Prom-Queen Villain/Ma Kent: Oh, but you should. You should go with me.
Clark: Are you coming on to me, mom? Ick ick ick.

Seconded, thirded and twenty-fourthed.

Ma Kent: By the way, you should go to the prom. I got you a tux and everything.
Clark: Sigh. Are you possessed again?

This sounds eerily familiar, except without the possession.

Evil Mwahaha-Prom-Queen Villain/Chloe: Geez, she just died earlier today. Can't you at least show some respect for the dead?
Crowd: Nah, inexplicable deaths, mutations, and insanities are the norm around here.

I get the impression that this high school class should be more decimated than the Voyager crew by now. Also, kudos to the crowd for being able to speak in perfect unison for that long.

Evil Mwahaha-Prom-Queen Villain/Clark: Mwahaha! Now give me the crown. I'm the queen around here.
Pa Kent: Things I never wanted to hear my son say.

Clark: Oooh! I can look through stuff. Why didn't you tell me I had X-Ray vision?
Chloe: I, uh, wanted you to figure it out for yourself.
Clark: Ha! You didn't know I could. I can see right through you.

Congratulations on taking the high road and not going with the obvious lewdity. However, you lose points for going with the obvious wordplay.

Clark: Hubba hubba! Who is that beauty on the stairs? She makes me all hot under the eyelids.
Chloe: Shouldn't that be "hot under the collar"?
(FOOM!)
Chloe: Guess not. Am I just going to get a grand tour of all your powers?

That'll be a long tour. They seemed to make them up as they went during the movies (my favourite was Rebuild The Great Wall Vision). Hey, wait, didn't Superman have an Amnesia Kiss in Superman II?

Lana: Well, here I am!
Clark: Um, are we dating again? What about Jason? What about our miserable relationship from before?
Lana: But I'm all dressed up.
Clark: Good point. Let's date.

Like that ever happens.

Good job on Blank and Spir--oh, I get it now, dead-chick is the School *Spirit*. That's almost clever.