February 21st, 1994, "Masks"
Fiver by saxamaphone
The Episode
TROI: How's it going, Data?
DATA: I have finished.
(it's a perfect PADD)
DATA: The dimensions are accurate to within one point three percent.
TROI: I'm sure they are.
The strange thing is that with Data I'd expect
better than 1.3%. He has perfect sight and perfect control over his hands and the tools in them.
TROI: Maybe you should try something a little more abstract. Here. I want you to start a new piece. I'd like you to sculpt music.
DATA: Counsellor, music is a collection of acoustic vibrations. How can I reproduce a sound with clay?
TROI: Well, think of the effects that sounds have on people, the images that music brings to your mind, and then give it a form.
(he quickly forms a treble clef)
This is one that baffles me. He's a student of all art, and
plenty of artists have attempted to recreate music in a visual medium. There's plenty of material for Data to regurgitate and remix into a new form.
(a golden sun-face fills the screen)
LAFORGE: What's that one?
DATA: Death.
The idea of a sun god representing death seems like a stretch.
DATA: I do not know, sir. The object is nearly solid. It is composed primarily of fortanium and several unknown materials. It is over eighty seven million years old.
Only appearance of fortanium. It occurs to me that this would've been a great place to namedrop the "ceramic alloys" from "The Inner Light."
PICARD: The concept of the four cardinal compass directions is quite common in many different cultures.
In many nomadic societies the four cardinal directions are important representations of sunrise/sunset and the sources of the major winds. The Greeks and Romans even had names for twelve different wind directions. The ancient Arabs had a 32-point compass rose based on key constellations to be used for celestial navigation.
DATA: Geordi, what does it feel like when a person is losing his mind?
Always a chilling line.
(Data has the compass symbol on his forehead and a wicked grin)
The idea that the archive is mucking around with the matter in Data's body is quite disturbing.
LAFORGE: Captain, this is incredible. These artefacts weren't beamed over here from the archive. The matter here in Ten Forward has been transformed.
PICARD: Into living plants? How is that possible?
A valid question, but not the most important one right now. Then again, the replicator can create salads. How much more work would it be to set up a complete plant?
WORF: Sir, our weapon control systems are inoperative. However, we could reconfigure a photon torpedo for manual launch.
What about launching a shuttle and using the torpedoes from that? Are the shuttles being affected as well?
(the torpedo is full of snakes...
Now that's impressive. I sort of wish that they just said that the archive was doing all of these transformations, it would be easy to handwave the life creation if they did that.
RIKER: Maybe we'd better talk in here. The Observation Lounge has turned into a swamp.
It's amazing how the archive isn't transforming any of the hullplates or windows. Or the antimatter containment pods, for that matter.
RIKER: What about communications, sensors, life support?
LAFORGE: We have communications, and limited sensor control. Life support seems to be unaffected.
Why haven't they sent out a distress call yet? There's no guarantee that the archive won't transform the actual people at some point, this is a really dangerous situation!
WORF: Captain. The entire deck has been cleared of personnel. We may proceed.
Because we all know that Masaka's temple can be confined on a single deck. Ugh.
PICARD: Mister Data, are you all right?
DATA: I believe so, sir. I am not entirely certain what has happened. Have I been dreaming again?
They could've done so much more with the dreaming program. Come to think of it, they could've used it in the movies. The fear from not saving Geordi, the Borg Queen inserting herself into the dream, etc.
The Fiver
Picard: No, we won't even be breaking the ice.
Missing first lines alert!
Riker: What could they possibly mean?
Data: "Buried...Years...For all time --"
Is this a reference to something?
La Forge: Data, you can read this?
Data: Yes, I am hooked on hieroglyphics.
"Hooked on Phonics" is already a fading cultural memory. I pity the readers of the future who won't have a clue on why this is a joke.
Riker: Aye sir, but I think I should warn you that the ship's anti-virus software won't be installed until Tuesday.
Is the Tuesday gag the most prevalent movie-specific one on the site?
Picard: I don't know, but check out these pictures! This one's a giant snake head, I think.
Worf: "How Sharper Than A Serpent's Tooth!"
Picard: Worf, we're not playing the "List the Episodes or Movies that the Current Events Duplicate" game.
That game would get old really fast.
Nitpicker's Guide
* How did they know where Masaka's temple would be created?
* Phil points out how easily Data broke out and wonders why ship's security hasn't figured out a way to contain him yet.
* He wonders why they lugged a torpedo up to Main Engineering to modify it when they'd just have to lug it down to the torpedo bay again anyway. I question why you'd want a torpedo near the warp core in any case.
* When the temple turns back into the corridor Data and Picard weren't at floor level, why didn't they fall?