[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Ooooh. Very nice ones this time. Yay getting out of endless slumps!
I particularly liked Derek's:
[quote
ost_uid0]
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] If you betray everyone, we'll put you back in the Matrix.
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Make sure I'll be an actor. See if you can't put me in to some summer blockbuster about the nature of reality.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] I'll try, but I don't think anyone would buy it.[/quote
ost_uid0]
and:
[quote
ost_uid0][b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Be careful of Agents. They're cunning, powerful, and they'll try to bribe you to betray all your friends.
[b
ost_uid0]Neo:[/b
ost_uid0] How do you know so much about Agents?
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Uh....[/quote
ost_uid0]
NeoMatrix, I also liked this one a lot (slightly polished):
[quote
ost_uid0][b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] I'll betray all humanity, but only if you make me an actor.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] The last time we programmed someone to be an actor, it didn't quite work out.
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Let me guess. Neo.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] Yep, he's the One. [/quote
ost_uid0]
(Substituting "Keanu Reeves" for "Neo" in that last one might make it even funnier.)
I also like Sa'ar's:
[quote
ost_uid0][b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] I know this isn't really steak, but it tastes like steak, which is good enough for me.
[b
ost_uid0]Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] Actually, it doesn't. Â Cows were extinct by the time we got around to programming the Matrix, so we had to use a substitute.
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Which was...?
[b
ost_uid0]Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] Tofu. [/quote
ost_uid0]
The bit about the steak does stick in one's mind, and hence is prime fiving material... I thought of working with this one a bit, though:
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] I know this isn't really steak, but it tastes like steak, which is good enough for me. Tell your friends I'll turn traitor for you.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] Actually, the computers couldn't figure out what steak tastes like. You're eating prime-grade tofu.
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Oh. Well, in that case, I'll still turn traitor, but I'll get myself killed before finishing the job.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] Fair enough.
I also agree with NAHT... definitely the place for the "oh, nothing."
I might go for the following (since I really do like Derek's):
[b
ost_uid0]Neo:[/b
ost_uid0] Hey, Cypher, what's up?
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Oh, nothing.
[b
ost_uid0]Neo:[/b
ost_uid0] So, any advice you can give me?
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Yeah - be careful of Agents. They're cunning, powerful, and they'll try to bribe you to betray all your friends.
[b
ost_uid0]Neo:[/b
ost_uid0] How do you know so much about Agents?
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Uh....
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] I know this isn't really steak, but it tastes like steak, which is good enough for me. Tell your friends I'll turn traitor for you.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] Actually, the computers couldn't figure out what steak tastes like. You're eating prime-grade tofu.
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Oh. Well, in that case, I'll still turn traitor, but I'll get myself killed before finishing the job.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] Fair enough. Anything else?
[b
ost_uid0]Cypher:[/b
ost_uid0] Yeah - make me an actor. See if you can't put me in to some summer blockbuster about the nature of reality.
[b
ost_uid0]Agent Smith:[/b
ost_uid0] I'll try, but I don't think anyone would buy it.
It's a wee bit clumsy on the joke-melding... but still...[/color
ost_uid0]