[whoiam]

Alright, returning by a mixture of boredom and popular demand... well 4 people...

Originally Posted by erobourous

Dylan's Log: We're at the Perseid homeworld already. We're just that cool.

Lorian: (over the comm) Captain Archer, I am Lorian.
Archer: Who are you? What do you want?
Trance: I'll miss you if you die.
Harper: Even if I rise again as a vampire?
Trance: Especially. You and I have a sort of indefinable bond....
Lorian: In case you haven't noticed, Captain, I outrank you. Now do it! ...Er, don't do it.
Archer: You don't outrank me.
Lorian: Do so. Seniority.

Archer: Welcome to our ship. Now explain yourself or I'm stapling your face to the hull.
Harper: Oh, really? What choice would you make?
Trance: Suicide.

Höhne: Welcome to the Perseid homeworld.
Dylan: Um... don't you have a name for it?
Lorian: Funny story, that....

Archer: Whew! We made it through the corridor and waaaait a sec. We're never filmed this bright.
Reed: Uh oh. This must be a flashback.
Mayweather: Sir? According to the position of the stars, we're 70 000 years from where we started.
Dylan: Eek. Time travel? Isn't that dangerous?
Harper: Dangerous of TIME, yes.

Lorian: We couldn't continue the mission or return to Earth, so we just sort of meandered for 117 years. You were captain until you died, then I took over.
Dylan: What do you think? Can he pull it off?
Andromeda: This is Harper we're talking about. He couldn't pull off a shirt.
Archer: Why didn't T'Pol?
Lorian: No one would let her near the big chair after Daniels gave us that tape of "Twilight." I've tried to be the kind of captain you'd want me to be....
Andromeda: I'll be male if that's how you want me.
Dylan: Um... no, thanks.

Phlox: Their story checks out, Captain. That Karyn Archer person has DNA from you, several of the crew, and a couple of weird alien species.
Archer: I guess I had an interesting sex life.
Phlox: I knew my coaching would get you there eventually. And get this. Lorian is the son of Vegeta and Bulma!
Dylan: Um....
Lorian: I carry this strictly for personal protection. It's my Second Amendment right.
Dylan: Oooooookay.

And in other news, Virtua-Pie is coming soon to an inbox near... Zeke!