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#21
06-23-2003, 04:21 AM
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[color=#000000
 ost_uid0]Considering the first part... Perhaps...[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] C'mon, Neo - now you learn everything you'll need - 1001 ways to kick the crap out of everybody.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Say... has anybody ever tried [iost_uid0]talking[/iost_uid0] to these guys?[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Shut up and download.[i ost_uid0](Neo spasms, sizzles, and comes out gasping for breath.)[/iost_uid0][b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Whoa! Give me more![b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Whoops. That was the "woman-in-the-red-dress" program.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] What dress?Or, on a similar note: [b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] C'mon, Neo - now you learn everything you'll need in order to fight in the Matrix![b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Wow - you guys probably have really sophisticated weapons, huh?[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Shut up and download.[i ost_uid0](Neo spasms, sizzles, and comes out gasping for breath.)[/iost_uid0][b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Whoa! Give me more![b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Whoops. That was the "woman-in-the-red-dress" program.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] What dress?Or even: [b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] C'mon, Neo - now you learn everything you'll need to fight in the Matrix![b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Will I learn how to defend myself against an Agent armed with a banana?[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Shut up and download.[i ost_uid0](Neo spasms, sizzles, and comes out gasping for breath.)[/iost_uid0][b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Whoa! Give me more![b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Whoops. That was the "woman-in-the-red-dress" program.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] What dress?[/colorost_uid0]
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Sal: Where\'s he goin\'? Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens. Sal: What? By himself? --It\'s Walky!, David Willis |
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#22
06-23-2003, 07:11 AM
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[quote
ost_uid0="Standback"][color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] C'mon, Neo - now you learn everything you'll need to fight in the Matrix![b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Will I learn how to defend myself against an Agent armed with a banana?[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Shut up and download.[i ost_uid0](Neo spasms, sizzles, and comes out gasping for breath.)[/iost_uid0][b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Whoa! Give me more![b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Whoops. That was the "woman-in-the-red-dress" program.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] What dress?[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0][color=#000000 ost_uid0]I like this one the best. Somehow the banana just gets to me  [/colorost_uid0]
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#23
06-23-2003, 01:42 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]I think I like [quoteost_uid0]Neo: Say... has anybody ever tried talking to these guys?[/quoteost_uid0] better in combination with [quoteost_uid0]Tank: Shut up and download.[/quoteost_uid0]Otherwise Tank's line just doesn't make sense to me.[/color ost_uid0]
__________________
~Bachelor of Science Marijke I'm not the devil, I just work for her. What spoon? There is no spoon. According to Zeke, it's a cat. ~NeoMatrix "Apparently we're on the wrong side. Or the right side if you like winning." ~Spike Sa'ar Chasm: Too far south you hit Belgium. catalina marina: Not in Limburg you don't.  Sa'ar Chasm: You do if you go south in the right way. |
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#24
06-23-2003, 08:57 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]I this scene calls for a 5MV reference.[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Good morning, Neo. Â Time for your training -- here's what you'll be learning.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] "How to become a martial arts master in 2698 easy steps." Â That sounds long.[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Don't worry, we've got a five-minute version.You could also tack on the "woman in the red dress" gag after Tank's line. Or, alternative version: [b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Good morning, Neo. Â Time for your training -- here's what you'll be learning.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] "How to become a martial arts master in 2698 easy steps." Â That sounds pretty heavy.[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Don't worry, we've got a condensed version. Â Training is long and life is short.[b ost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] (over the comm) Shorter for some than others.[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] I've had just about enough of your pessimism.[/colorost_uid0]
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\"It\'s all fun and games until one of you gets my foot up your ass.\" --Veronica Mars |
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#25
06-23-2003, 09:03 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Well, I like the second one, with the blatent five-minute reference - that and I know we wanted a reference to Cypher and 'zero' - ergo:[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Good morning, Neo. Â Time for your training -- here's what you'll be learning.[b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] "How to Become a Martial Arts Master in 2698 Easy Steps." Â That sounds pretty heavy.[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Don't worry, we've got a five-minute version. Â Training is long and life is short.[b ost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] (over the comm) Shorter for some than others.[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] What was that?[b ost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Oh, nothing.We could even change Neo's first line to, then Tank's second to, just to accentuate high stupidity: [b ost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] "Martial Arts for Dummies." That sounds pretty heavy.[b ost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Oh geez, well, we've got a five-minute version. Training is long and life is short.[/colorost_uid0]
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Benjamin Disraeli: You don't even know who I am! |
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#26
06-23-2003, 09:21 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Yeah, I like that version. Not the "Martial Arts for Dummies," though... I'm usually one of the first in line to bash Neo/Keanu but this time I think the joke works better with the "2698 steps".[/colorost_uid0]
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\"It\'s all fun and games until one of you gets my foot up your ass.\" --Veronica Mars |
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#27
06-23-2003, 09:22 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]I take it no-one likes mine at all then?[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants |
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#28
06-23-2003, 10:13 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Yours and most of the others so far are good, PHJ.[quote ost_uid0]Neo: "How to Become a Martial Arts Master in 2698 Easy Steps." Â That sounds like it could take a while.Tank: Oh geez, well, we've got a five-minute version. Â Training is long and life is short. Plus we've only got an 18K modem.[/quote ost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
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#29
06-23-2003, 10:35 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Plus we've only got an 18K modem.[/quoteost_uid0]2400. Â Smaller numbers are funnier (and I used to use a 2400 modem). Come to think of it, I'm not sure there's such a thing as an 18K modem. 300, 1200, 2400, 4800, 9600, 14.4, 28.8, 36K, 56K. It's scary that I know that.[/color ost_uid0]
__________________
The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them. |
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#30
06-23-2003, 10:40 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]I think adding a modem joke slows the scene down, personally. I like Sax's take on my second version.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
\"It\'s all fun and games until one of you gets my foot up your ass.\" --Veronica Mars |
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#31
06-23-2003, 11:53 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]That's fine with me then. It's funny, and we'll save space for later in case someone gets inspired at length with a scene further on.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
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#32
06-24-2003, 12:01 AM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]I think adding a modem joke slows the scene down, personally. [/quoteost_uid0]Ah, I see you're familiar with my modem.[/color ost_uid0]
__________________
The first run through of any experimental procedure is to identify any potential errors by making them. |
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#34
06-24-2003, 06:09 AM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Tank: Good morning, Neo. Time for your training -- here's what you'll be learning.Neo: "How to become a martial arts master in 47 easy steps." That sounds long. Tank: Don't worry, we've got a five-minute version. *Downloading* Neo: Holy Cow, there was a hot woman in there! Tank: Oops, that was the "Woman in the Red Dress" Program Neo: Why was I wearing the red dress?[/color ost_uid0]
__________________
NeoMatrix\'s Livejournal My Myspace Page 5MV Story Website (Updated: February 16th, 2006) |
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#35
06-24-2003, 07:07 AM
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[quote
ost_uid0="NeoMatrix"][color=#000000ost_uid0]Neo: Why was I wearing the red dress?[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0][color=#000000 ost_uid0]The One, cross-dressing? No, dude, no. Bad image. BaaAAd image.[/colorost_uid0]
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#36
06-24-2003, 11:14 AM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Cypher: (over the comm) Shorter for some than others.[/quoteost_uid0]Do not try to use the comm, that is impossible. Instead, try to realize the truth: There is no comm.  [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
~Bachelor of Science Marijke I'm not the devil, I just work for her. What spoon? There is no spoon. According to Zeke, it's a cat. ~NeoMatrix "Apparently we're on the wrong side. Or the right side if you like winning." ~Spike Sa'ar Chasm: Too far south you hit Belgium. catalina marina: Not in Limburg you don't. Sa'ar Chasm: You do if you go south in the right way. |
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#37
06-25-2003, 08:38 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Well, the consensus seems to be for the Sax-Kira version, so I'll go for that too.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images. Sergeant: You can? That's amazing! Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'. - Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!) "Everybody loves pie!" - Spongebob Squarepants |
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#39
07-03-2003, 02:17 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Still voting for the Sax-Kira ticket, er, I mean scene. Â (Edit) But, if we go with Neo's first version, I think we can safely cut Tank's second-to-last line.[/color ost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list Yup “There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs |
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#40
07-03-2003, 08:28 PM
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[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Well, some people were for mine earlier. Are they still liking mine? My first one that is.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
NeoMatrix\'s Livejournal My Myspace Page 5MV Story Website (Updated: February 16th, 2006) |
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