June 15

[Derek]

Originally Posted by PointyHairedJedi

And I for one am really looking forward to "PointyHairedJedi Is Great" Day too. It's about time people realized just how super I am!

And it'll be a great event too.

Five-Minute "Balance of Terror"
Kirk: Who is this ship that eludes us every step of our pursuit? Spock, can you patch us in to their viewscreen?
Spock: I believe so, Captain.
PointyHairedJedi: Mwahahaha!
Kirk: We're doomed.

Five-Minute Wrath of Khan
PointyHairedJedi: I've done far worse than kill you. I've hurt you. And I wish to go on hurting you. I shall leave you as you left me, as you left her: marooned for all eternity in the center of a dead planet, buried alive.... Buried alive....
Kirk: JEEEEEEEEEDIIIIIIIII!
PHJ: Oh just wait until the next movie. I've got that one down to five minutes.

Five-Minute "Where No One Has Gone Before"
PointyHairedJedi: (materializing like the Traveller does) Hey, guys! Just a sec.
(ZAP!)
Wesley: GAK!
Picard: Oh my gosh! He killed Wesley!
Riker: You b-- Actually, I'm pretty okay with that.
PHJ: Now set a course for Risa, Warp 11!
Geordi: Aye, aye, sir!
PHJ: One "aye" is sufficient, ensign.
Picard: Why, you, try to steal command of my ship, will you? I'll show you --
Riker: Worf, Tasha, help me hold him back, he's trying to hit the new captain!

Five-Minute "Q-Less"
PointyHairedJedi: (PUNCH! PUNCH! PUNCH!)
Sisko: (PUNCH!)
PHJ: You hit me! Picard never hit me!
Picard: That's just because it's been very hard tracking you down. (PUNCH!)
PHJ: I don't like this episode so much.

Five-Minute "Endgame"
PHJ: I have returned at the turn of the tide. The great storm is coming, but the tide has turned.
Janeway: Wait a minute, shouldn't this have been my future double? Will I grow up to be PointyHairedJedi?
PHJ: Pfft. You should be so lucky.

Five-Minute "These are the Voyages"
Villain: We kill the Captain now.
Tucker: No! You have to kill me instead!
PointyHairedJedi: Get out of the way. Let me do that.
(BOOM!)
Tucker: Oh no! Now I don't have a noble sacrificial death!
Archer: Neither does he! How did he stay alive?
PHJ: I'm PointyHairedJedi. I'm just that great. Now let's get to Earth so I can form the Federation.
Archer: Wait, you form it! But I thought --
PHJ: Yeah, we all know what you thought. Now let's get to Earth.