September 20: Star Wars Trilogy

[Xeroc]

ROTFLMAOL!

An awesome fiver!

Favorite parts... It was all so good!

Imperial Soldier: The files are not in the main computer, Lord Vader.
Vader: Damn! (strangling Rebel soldier) Where are those transmissions?
Rebel Soldier: Ack... diplomatic... urk... mission....
Vader: Perhaps you'll be more cooperative if I choke you to death!
Rebel Soldier: GAK!
Vader: Hm... maybe I should have thought that through first.

Luke: Stupid chores! Stupid Uncle Owen! Stupid Tatooine!
C3PO: Pardon me, Master Luke, but are you always this whiny?
Luke: Yes. Are you always this annoying?
C3PO: Yes.
Luke: Great, we should get along splendidly.

-- and --

Luke: I wish Han were here. And Ben. Sigh.
Leia: Are you always this whiny?
Luke: Yes. Are you always this hot?
Leia: Yes.
Luke: Great, we should get along splendidly.

Luke: This droid says he belongs to you.
Obi-Wan: I've never seen him before in my life.
R2D2: beepboop beblip deep doop bloop
Obi-Wan: I think I'd remember something like that. Come, young Luke, let us gather up the pieces of your cowardly droid and come to my hut where I'll talk you into a quest that will lead you away from everything you've ever known and change your life forever. And I have Tang.
Luke: Sweet! Tang!

Stormtrooper 1: We're looking for some missing droids just like the two you've got in your speeder here. Show us some identification.
Obi-Wan: Of course, it's right -- Look over there!
Stormtrooper 1: What? Where?
(VROOOOOOM)
Stormtrooper 2: You idiot! You just fell for the infamous Jedi Mind Trick.

Tarkin: Tell us where the Rebel base is or we'll blow up Alderaan.
Leia: Oh no! Not Alderaan! The Rebels are on the planet Ecoyday in the Uckersay system.
Tarkin: Excellent. Told you she would cave, Vader.
Vader: I have a bad feeling about this.
Tarkin: Princess, we thank you for your cooperation and ACTIVATE THE DEATH STAR! Mwahahaha!
Leia: But... but....
Tarkin: What? I'm evil.

R2D2: beep deboop zoop blip boopboop!
C3PO: He says the Princess is here, and scheduled to be executed.
Luke: Oh no! I can't let that hot chick die! Come on, we have to rescue her!
Solo: What's in it for me? Can I hook up with her?
Luke: Only if I can't, though I can't imagine why that would be.

Obi-Wan: You can kill me, Darth, but I'll just come back even more powerful than before. "Obi-Wan the White," they'll call me.
Vader: Fifty bucks says you can't pull that off.
Obi-Wan: You're on.
(WHOOSH)
Vader: (poking the empty robe) Damn! Where'd he go?
Luke: Nooooo! Ben! Now how will you get the fifty bucks?

Obi-Wan: Use the Force, Luke.
Luke: Great, just what I needed. A back seat driver.

Obi-Wan: Let go, Luke. Trust me.
Luke: You mean shut off the targeting computer? Why?
Obi-Wan: It will make it more impressive when you manage to blow up the station.
Luke: Fair enough.

Luke: So, we've destroyed the Death Star and rid the galaxy of the evil Empire. I guess this is the end. I mean, it's not like they can strike back or anything. Right, guys?
Leia: Er....
Solo: Um....
Chewbacca: Rooowwoorrrr!
Luke: Sigh.

Leia: Luke Skywalker, for sheer dumb luck, I award you this medal.
Luke: Sweet!
All: Yay!
Leia: And to you, Han Solo, I award this medal for running like a chicken until the last possible second.
Solo: Oo! Shiny!
All: Yay!
Chewbacca: Rooowwoorrrr!
Leia: Sorry, I'm all out.
All: Boo!
(Chewbacca sulks at Ludicrous Speed)