The Five-Minute Forums  

Go Back   The Five-Minute Forums > FiveMinute.net > News

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 01-02-2023, 01:44 AM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,402
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default Five-Minute Orville: "Old Wounds"

Welcome to 2023! I have big plans for 5MV this year, so let's get off to a big start with something I've been waiting for the right time to launch: Five-Minute Orville.

It's been one of the great mysteries of my lifetime that with five Trek shows currently airing, Seth freaking MacFarlane, who isn't making one, is somehow making the best one. I have many gripes with The Orville, but its heart is actually in the right place. It managed a downright weird transition from fan tribute in the first season to actual sci-fi in its own right thereafter. And it takes itself seriously enough for fivers to work (though it's sometimes a close call, especially in those early days).

A proper subsite is coming, but for now, here's Five-Minute "Old Wounds". May this New Year's launch bring the show luck for getting renewed this year!
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 01-02-2023, 03:38 AM
Nate the Great's Avatar
Nate the Great Nate the Great is offline
You just activated his Trek card
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 4,983
Default

*waves*
__________________
mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 01-04-2023, 09:18 PM
Wowbagger's Avatar
Wowbagger Wowbagger is offline
Long fellow
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Tanngrisnir
Posts: 421
Default

Quote:
Kelly: Hurry! They've almost caught up!
Mercer: I just can't get this door open! It's so tightly closed, like a jar -- a jar of --
(long pause)
Alara: Sir?
Mercer: Alara, I just thought of the greatest joke in history and I am going to make it every chance I get for the rest of my life.
This fiver is better than the episode it fives.

I say this as a fan of The Orville overall. Their pilot was awful and now maybe I can just give people this fiver so they can skip the pilot.
__________________
Wowbagger
Forum Lurker
CURRENTLY: I've finally dived into the "let's everybody make a fan film" Kool-Aid.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 01-05-2023, 04:17 AM
Wowbagger's Avatar
Wowbagger Wowbagger is offline
Long fellow
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Tanngrisnir
Posts: 421
Default

Quote:
Gordon: This is amazing, Ed! But before I can get a new job, I'll need to kill this holographic enemy.
Enemy: GAK!
Mercer: Why would... oh, because you needed experience.
Gordon: You know me so well.
CONFESSION: I didn't get this one.

Quote:
Halsey: Sorry, no luck finding a first officer. You'll have to leave without one.
Mercer: Oo, I had an idea about that! I'll see if I can get into a dangerous situation with a bunch of criminals, something where we have to work together to survive, and I'll make their leader my first officer. Oh, we'll have trouble getting along at first, but over time --
Halsey: Yes yes, fine. Whatever gets you off my station faster.
"Over time" = by the time Joe Carey breaks his bones in the second episode.

Quote:
Gordon: Awww, I was hoping our version of warp would have "slip" in the name.
Mercer: Are you still on that slipper thing?
Gordon: Don't tell me you don't see it!
This sounds like actual dialogue. I can hear it.

Quote:
Gordon: Oh, it goes way beyond that. I promise you, nobody who so much as looks like me could ever stand her.
I'm forced to conclude that Gordon has been in stuff.

Quote:
Mercer: Wow, tardigrades sound amazing! I wonder if they could even steer a starship?
Aronov: I will thank you not to mock our serious discovery.
Got 'em!

Quote:
Mercer: I didn't, he killed everybody the first time. But then I used the Omega 13.
THIS one I understood, hooray hooray.
__________________
Wowbagger
Forum Lurker
CURRENTLY: I've finally dived into the "let's everybody make a fan film" Kool-Aid.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 02-04-2023, 10:47 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,402
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wowbagger View Post
I say this as a fan of The Orville overall. Their pilot was awful and now maybe I can just give people this fiver so they can skip the pilot.
I found it much better on second viewing, when I knew what to expect from it: a real sci-fi setting but no real sci-fi content just yet. Prep yourself for Galaxy Quest and you'll have a good time. My parents loved it!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wowbagger View Post
CONFESSION: I didn't get this one.
You need experience to get a new job, right? And killing enemies is worth XP.

Quote:
I'm forced to conclude that Gordon has been in stuff.
You didn't think you were making a dirty joke, but the guy who "looks like" Gordon isn't a Scott Grimes character, it's Scott Grimes himself. See, he was married for a while to Adrianne Palicki...

(The other not-spelled-out casting joke is toward the end. Victor Garber, who plays Admiral Halsey, was one of the main stars of DC's Legends of Tomorrow.)
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction

Last edited by Zeke; 02-05-2023 at 12:35 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 02-05-2023, 04:07 AM
Wowbagger's Avatar
Wowbagger Wowbagger is offline
Long fellow
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Tanngrisnir
Posts: 421
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke View Post
You didn't think you were making a dirty joke, but the guy who "looks like" Gordon isn't a Scott Grimes character, it's Scott Grimes himself. See, he was married for a while to Adrianne Palicki...
Gracious. Imagine working 12-hour days on a television show opposite your ex-wife. What the heck, Hollywood.

(Meanwhile, Seth was apparently having something with his security officer, and then she left when it fell apart, which is its own kind of gross.)
__________________
Wowbagger
Forum Lurker
CURRENTLY: I've finally dived into the "let's everybody make a fan film" Kool-Aid.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 02-05-2023, 04:40 AM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,402
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

The supreme irony is that they also got together on the show. They had an office romance while making a whole show about how bad an idea that is!

Seems to happen a lot in Hollywood. My personal favourite example, for its severe twistiness, is Michael C. Hall and Jennifer Carpenter on Dexter. They played Dexter and Deb, who grew up thinking they were blood siblings -- neither knew that Dex was adopted until Season 1 of the show -- and the actors got married. Then they got divorced. And then the show had Deb fall in love with Dex! It must've been even more awkward on set than it was in-universe. (Mercifully, that storyline was strangled in its crib when Deb found out Dex was a serial killer -- the person she loved was his "normal" persona, and now she knew he'd been faking that all his life. Still creepy though.)
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
5mo, a ton of casting jokes, old wounds, orville

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 02:21 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.