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  #1  
Old 08-18-2003, 03:45 AM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Zeke here. Â I said in the forums that there would be a biggish update today, but the work is taking a little longer than I expected (I'm making major layout changes to a lot of pages). Â So that part -- the subsite relaunch I promised in last Sunday's update -- will have to wait till tomorrow.

However, while the layout part may not be ready, I see no reason to hold back the content part. Â Kira has a new [iost_uid0]This Just In[/iost_uid0] today -- Lucas under fire from ASPCA, PETA -- and I think it's her funniest yet. Â Read, enjoy, and give her some feedback at the link below. Â (And be sure to come back tomorrow to see which subsite is getting a new look.)[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-18-2003, 04:17 AM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Lucas muttered something about Argentinian llamas when confronted with Portman's claim but declined to elaborate.[/quoteost_uid0]

That and the "Gigli" crack were probably the parts I found funniest. Good job![/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-18-2003, 07:11 AM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]I always suspected Eps I and II were coming from this kind of a source. Â Thanks, TJI, for enlightening me! Â Â Good job, Kira.

Oh, by the way, you might enjoy this link that has to be seen to be believed:

http://www.newtechusa.com/PPI/main.asp[/colorost_uid0]

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Old 08-18-2003, 12:19 PM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Great job, Kira. That really explains the whole car chase thing at the beginning of Ep 2.[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-18-2003, 03:18 PM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Another good one, Kira! Much funny stuff.

Got an extra kick out of the Roger Ebert comments, due to having just read an article by [iost_uid0]Chronicle[/iost_uid0] critic Mick LaSalle on how dumb the movies have become. (Fun with synchronicity. )[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-18-2003, 09:26 PM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]I'm glad somebody enjoyed it as much as I did. Â (Okay, maybe [iost_uid0]as[/iost_uid0] much is pushing it, seeing as how easily I amuse myself, but still.) Â I think this proves once and for all that funny ideas you have at quarter after three in the morning [iost_uid0]can[/iost_uid0] sound just as funny when you're fully awake.

A few comments:[*]The llamas thing was inspired by the opening credits for [iost_uid0]Monty Python and the Holy Grail[/iost_uid0]. Â If you wonder why there are llamas in the credits of a movie, that means you've never seen it, and goons have now been dispatched to your house to beat some sense into you.[*]I had no idea that monkeys actually could do this sort of thing. Â Perhaps Zeke could hire one, solving once and for all the problem of getting him to answer emails?[*]If you don't know who Triumph the Insult Dog is, go on Kazaa or WinMX or DALnet or whatever you use and search for "Triumph at Star Wars." Â The skit from Conan O'Brien that will come up is easily one of the top ten funniest things I've ever seen. Â I still can't watch it without hyperventillating.[*]On a more serious note, this article was inspired when I heard that Lucas was writing the dialogue for [iost_uid0]Episode III[/iost_uid0] literally minutes before shooting. Â The monkey idea might not be so bad after all....[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-19-2003, 01:06 AM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]The Triumph skit is the one which included the guy dressed up as Spock giving the middle finger to the whole queue of Star Wars fans queuing up for the movie, wasn't it?

That was MAJORLY funny.

p.s. Great job, Kira! Apparently, there was this college which spent thousands of dollars to conduct a monkeys-with-typewriters experiment which ended in failure. These people...[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-19-2003, 01:48 AM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Yep... the Star Wars nerds were "asking to be pooped on" so Triumph had to go for poop backup. And what could annoy die-hard Star Wars fans more than Spock?

Other highlights include Triumph humping a light saber, finding a girl among the nerds, and asking Darth Vader if the controls on his box are to call his mother to pick him up.[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-19-2003, 04:01 AM
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[quoteost_uid0="taya17"][color=#000000ost_uid0]p.s. Great job, Kira! Apparently, there was this college which spent thousands of dollars to conduct a monkeys-with-typewriters experiment which ended in failure. These people...[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0]I've read a book written by monkeys. I think it was the TNG novel "Here There Be Dragons"... okay, seriously, I [iost_uid0]have[/iost_uid0] read a book written by monkeys. It was only six pages long and pretty incoherent, and it resulted from the monkeys not so much typing on the keyboards as defecating on them, but it did show some promise. I doubt the typewriters would agree, however. Or the typewriter cleaners.[/colorost_uid0]
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[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 08-19-2003, 04:08 AM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Concrete proof that we should never get a monkey to do a man's job.


Not that defecating on a keyboard is a man's job, mind you...[/colorost_uid0]
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  #11  
Old 08-19-2003, 12:15 PM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Speaking of monkies, have you ever seen the commercial for Trunk Monkey? In the commercial, the driver pushes the Trunk Monkey button and a monkey pops out of the back with a wrench, then walks over the the other driver that is yelling and knocks him out, then gets back in the trunk.[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-19-2003, 03:09 PM
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[quoteost_uid0="taya17"][color=#000000ost_uid0]Apparently, there was this college which spent thousands of dollars to conduct a monkeys-with-typewriters experiment which ended in failure. These people...[/colorost_uid0][/quoteost_uid0]
[color=#000000ost_uid0]That might have been these folks.[/colorost_uid0]
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Old 08-19-2003, 05:44 PM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Yep, that's the article I read.[/colorost_uid0]
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[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 08-19-2003, 10:53 PM
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[color=#000000ost_uid0]Interesting bit o' trivia:

The article states that the origin of the "infinite number of monkeys/typewriters/work of literature" notion has been attributed to English biologist and Darwin supporter Thomas Huxley, who happens to be the grandfather of Aldous.

Brave new world, indeed. [/colorost_uid0]
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