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  #1  
Old 02-21-2008, 10:24 PM
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Default February 21 (TJIB 5+6)

Guess what? Today I've got two new TJI Briefs for you, both slightly past their obvious inspiration dates but still edible. Here's #5, Sheridan unveils groundhog plan, and the very strange #6, Giants crush patriots.

(Also, we've now moved to a better server. Thanks as usual to AntonyF for the seamless changeover.)

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[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 02-21-2008, 10:39 PM
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#5 is particularly amusing, but #6 is great too!

Quote:
"I'll never forget the last thing Kosh said to me before he di-- uh, fell down. He said 'Groundhogs are the key to GAK.' Look, the fall took a lot out of him. Anyway, Vorlons are never easy to understand, but I believe I've found the meaning of Kosh's words. My track record is pretty good. Remember when I saved us from that space probe a while ago? I realized just in time what Kosh had meant when he said 'Later today, blow up a probe.'"
Verrrrrrrry nice.
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Old 02-22-2008, 12:02 AM
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Quote:
This year's bowl was the most-watched since 2004, when the cavemen defeated the astronauts in a hard-fought battle.
That's not the way I remembered it....
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Old 02-22-2008, 06:25 PM
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Quote:
"It may seem silly, or even just pun-based," continued Capt. Sheridan, "but this new plan will help us stave off the Shadows, and that's what counts. My critics call it rodenculous; I call it prodent."
Capt. Sheridan then died, but recovered in time to issue the groundhogs their assignments.
Very funny. Great puns.
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Candace: (gasp) The square root of 'soon' is 'never'!

The Doctor: It was all in the job title: Head of human resources.
Lance: This time, it's personnel.

To God be the glory. ><>
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Old 02-22-2008, 07:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Derek View Post
That's not the way I remembered it....
...

Excuse me while I change the year on that. I was just using the year "A Hole in the World" aired.
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[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
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Old 02-26-2008, 10:18 PM
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Do American "football" teams really have such daft nicknames as that*? Also, do you have have any kind of Google account on the go, Zeke? I sent you an email but neglected to actually ask about that part.


*Disclaimer: Ours are probably dafter, but speaking from a position of near complete ignorance on the matter, I don't care so much.
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Old 02-26-2008, 11:26 PM
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If you mean 'Giants', 'Patriots', 'Packers', 'Cardinals', and 'Redskins', then yes. If you mean 'tailors', 'slingshot-wielders', 'Lilliputians', or 'math teachers', then no. If you mean 'groundhogs', then you must be reading the wrong TJI.
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Candace: (gasp) The square root of 'soon' is 'never'!

The Doctor: It was all in the job title: Head of human resources.
Lance: This time, it's personnel.

To God be the glory. ><>
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Old 02-29-2008, 01:00 AM
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Do you know what I miss? Daily updates. I've meant to say that for some time, but, really, there was something comforting about logging on every day and finding some random link from the Zeke.

That was how I discovered both webcomics and ARG's, in fact. Much good came of the daily link dump.

Don't feel guilty about it, Zeke! Just give your crazed fans something, and soon!

(Barring that, start a webcomic. xkcd doesn't update often enough and you're funnier anyway.)

Anyhow, great TJI's, as always.
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Old 02-29-2008, 04:45 AM
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It saddens me that I can't reply to that without sounding either demanding, lecturing, pathetic, or just plain stupid.
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Old 03-05-2008, 01:08 AM
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Then expand your repertoire. Try for, say, enlightening or mysterious or invigorated.
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“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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Old 03-05-2008, 02:33 AM
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Is it true? Are there actual updates on a quasi regular basis?
For serious?
I can come back?

Huh, next thing you know, I'll get accepted into Queens...
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Well I guess I'll just live WITHOUT an avatar then!
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Old 03-05-2008, 03:36 AM
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I meant that replying with what I'm actually thinking would put a lot of bad feelings into the air, plus get me into a lot of hot water.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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Old 03-05-2008, 05:58 AM
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You could just PM me with your demanding, lecturing, pathetic, or just plain stupid comments. I won't share them with the world.
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Old 03-08-2008, 03:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nate the Great View Post
I meant that replying with what I'm actually thinking would put a lot of bad feelings into the air, plus get me into a lot of hot water.
Then don't reply with what you're thinking. Works for me.

Or, you could try thinking things that would put a lot of better feelings in the air (or maybe pull bad feelings out of the air? Surely they've invented something to do that) and help you avoid getting into too much overly heated water. That might be even better!
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“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
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Old 03-08-2008, 05:11 AM
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I suppose I shouldn't do the obvious gag of suggesting an interracial group hillside singalong, should I?
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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  #16  
Old 03-09-2008, 09:51 PM
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Obvious gag...

Someday, young fellow, we shall have to preserve your brain for future science.
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Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images.
Sergeant: You can? That's amazing!
Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'.
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"Everybody loves pie!"
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Old 03-10-2008, 12:00 AM
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Just remember to put my brain jar next to Einstein's. Or else build it into a robotic body a la The Starship Destiny.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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  #18  
Old 03-10-2008, 05:27 AM
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Is he ever gonna hit Krazy Kat, or what?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PointyHairedJedi View Post
Someday, young fellow, we shall have to preserve your brain for future science.
In a lead-lined concrete box? At the bottom of the Marianas Trench?

Still risky. I don't know...
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Old 03-10-2008, 05:39 AM
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Actually, the safest route is probably launching my ashes into the sun or something.
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mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
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