The Five-Minute Forums  

Go Back   The Five-Minute Forums > FiveMinute.net > Miscellaneous

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 04-04-2007, 05:46 AM
Nate the Great's Avatar
Nate the Great Nate the Great is offline
Knate airrant
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 3,116
Default Finish Data's Joke

I was watching my copy of The Outrageous Okona. At one point Data starts to tell a joke to Guinan with the following opening sentence:

A monk, a clone, and a Ferengi decide to go bowling together...

But a page prevents him from finishing it. So my challenge is to submit punchlines to the joke, comment on each other's idea of the best one, and so forth. What can I say, I like to whack at hornet's nests.

Here's my first "sample" punchline:

A monk, a clone, and a Ferengi decide to go bowling together, but somehow on the way all three get beamed to a Borg cube and get thrown into a cell to await their inevitable assimilation. The question of who will be assimilated first comes up. The monk steeples his fingers and prepares to meditate. "It doesn't matter, the Prophets will guide me." The Ferengi takes out his wallet and starts to count his latinum. "I'm not quite as rich as I'd hoped to be, but at least I have enough to bribe the Grand Arbiter and get into the Divine Treasury." The clone just starts to hum. The monk glares at him and the Ferengi quickly hides his money. "What are you doing?" they ask. "Oh, I'll be safe. In this day and age even drones aren't tasteless enough to say 'Send in the clones.'"
__________________
mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 04-04-2007, 08:44 AM
danieldoof's Avatar
danieldoof danieldoof is offline
I fell in the pit
You fell in the pit
We all fell in the piiiiit
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,637
Default

WOW that one actually works
very nice

though I have no idea for one
__________________
.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 04-04-2007, 02:27 PM
Nate the Great's Avatar
Nate the Great Nate the Great is offline
Knate airrant
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 3,116
Default

It's not quite as good as I was hoping. For the longest time I wanted to get some sort of bowling joke into the punchline. However, since it is one of my first attempts at an honest-to-goodness manufactured joke, I still think it's good. I tend to specialize in topical, spur-of-the-moment gags.

A monk, a clone, and a Ferengi decide to go bowling together. At the alley they stand in line to pay for their rental shoes. The attendant charges the clone five bucks. The monk isn't charged anything. When the Ferengi steps up the attendant whips out a phaser. "What's this about?" the Ferengi asks. "I may just be a lowly bowling lot attendant," the guy says, "but even I have more self-respect than to be sucked into a lame joke like this with someone like you."
__________________
mudshark: Nate's just being...Nate.
Zeke: It comes nateurally to him.

mudshark: I don't expect Nate to make sense, really -- it's just a bad idea.

Sa'ar Chasm on the 5M.net forum: Sit back, relax, and revel in the insanity.

Adam Savage: I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Crow T. Robot: Oh, stop pretending there's a plot. Don't cheapen yourself further.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 04-08-2007, 09:20 PM
Chancellor Valium's Avatar
Chancellor Valium Chancellor Valium is offline
Reasonably priced male pills
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Rhen Var, sitting on a radiator...
Posts: 4,595
Send a message via MSN to Chancellor Valium
Default

A monk, a clone, and a Ferengi decide to go bowling together. As they walk down the street, the Englishman notices them, and says to the Irishman and the Scotsman "I think we're in the wrong joke."
__________________
O to be wafted away
From this black aceldama of sorrow;
Where the dust of an earthy today
Is the earth of a dusty tomorrow!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 04-09-2007, 06:10 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,138
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

A monk, a clone, and a Ferengi decide to go bowling together...

On their way to the bowling alley, they find a lamp in a trash can. The monk took it and said, "This is a priceless object and should be kept on display for all to see." The Ferengi grabbed it and started rubbing it. An old genie appeared, saying, "I am old genie with no more wishes to grant. My last request for one of you to replace me. The Ferengi looked at the monk and said, "Send in the clone!"
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 04-11-2007, 06:42 PM
Katy Jane's Avatar
Katy Jane Katy Jane is offline
Or is it KJHTMMM now?
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St. Louis
Posts: 1,139
Send a message via MSN to Katy Jane Send a message via Yahoo to Katy Jane
Default

these are all great! :lol:

Hopefuly I can think of something. :idea:
__________________
Vulcan children are never late with their Sehlat's dinner
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 12:52 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.