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Marill presents....

The Top 10 Reasons Fifth Voyager is Not For Sane Voyager Fans

A manifestation of Alternate Universe Week

  1. Janeway would never say the word "poo" and call Chakotay "Tattoo Boy"
  2. One of the extra main characters keeps a stake under his bed
  3. Neelix streaked in the first season yet he still lives
  4. The phrases "screw you" and "oh my God" are used very often
  5. The recurring main villain is a guy called Damien, who is obsessed with rabbits
  6. What do Scarlett Pomers and Sarah Michelle Gellar have in common? Naomi Wildman
  7. Janeway and Chakotay's daughter captains the Enterprise-E in the third season, and Tom's the first officer
  8. The same daughter has her own daughter, more or less the same age, with a Q for a dad
  9. Seven of Nine and Riker kiss in one episode
And the number one reason Fifth Voyager is not for sane Voyager fans....
  1. Janeway has a secret drunken love child with a guy who looks like Jeremy Irons, and did I mention that the son keeps a stake under his bed?
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This list was originally published on June 19, 2003.

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All material © 2003, Marill.