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Zeke presents....

The Top 10 Things Not to Say on the Enterprise-D

  1. "You call yourself a Riker? When was the last time you riked anything?"
  2. "Oh, so that's what happened to my barrette!"
  3. "Come ON. The original show did this story like six times."
  4. "Where has Q been lately, anyway? I miss him."
  5. "Know an easy way to check if you're on one of Picard's ships? Check the weapons console for dust."
  6. "WARP CORE BREACH! Everybody out! ...Heh heh. There isn't really a breach. I just wanted to watch Geordi roll under the door."
  7. "How do you guys like that thesaurus subroutine I gave Data? Pretty cool, eh?"
  8. "Don't tell Troi, but I'm totally making up these psychological problems."
  9. "Wouldn't it be more efficient if we used the kids as fuel?"
And the number one thing not to say on the Enterprise-D....
  1. "Oo, look at that. A big mean Klingon security guy. I'm soooo scared."
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This list was originally published on September 5, 2005.

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All material © 2005, Colin Hayman.