[color=#000000
ost_uid0]Can't resist cookies. Here goes (with apologies in advance):
Top Ten Off-Color Joe Piscopo Jokes Cut From "The Outrageous Okona"
10. How many Ferengi does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three—one to sell the light-bulb-screwing-in franchise, one to sell the actual light bulb, and one to lease access to the socket.
9. A robot walks into a bar. He orders a scotch and fire extinguisher.
8. A Pakled was on his first visit to the big space station. Passing by the transporter chamber, he sees a big ugly Klingon warrior beam out; a few seconds later a beautiful Deltan female beams in. The Pakled scratches his head and says, "Sure wish I'd brought the wife!"
7. A Vulcan died and was startled to find he was surrounded by millions of annoying, laughing, illogical Earthlings. Unable to take it for more than a few minutes, he sought out St. Peter and said, "Something went wrong. I've been sent to Earth heaven by mistake." St. Peter laughed and said, "Buddy, this isn't Earth heaven—this is Vulcan hell!"
6. How many nanites does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, same as anywhere else.
5. There are 10 types of people in the galaxy—those who understand binary, and those who don't.
4. I once served with a guy who was so dumb, he thought "life support" was a help desk for screw-ups.
3. My wife is the exact opposite of a Vulcan. She thinks about nothing but sex and she has logic once every seven years.
2. How many Children of Tama does it take to screw in a light bulb? Mimba, his finger extended.
And the Number One Off-Color Joe Piscopo Joke Cut From "The Outrageous Okona":
1. A Bolian walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, buddy, why so blue?"
I'm here all week. Try the veal![/color
ost_uid0]