My (best-scenario) guess is that Xeroc has the server offline for some quick "routine maintenance", such as defragging, dusting, and making sure all the plugs are firmly plugged in where they're supposed to be

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Yup
“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs