When I want to find the fiver a particular gag is in without rereading them all (as much fun as that might be), I use Google. Just start your query with "site:fiveminute.net" and the search will be restricted to 5MV. In this case it didn't work, but that's because I searched for "hittites" plural; when I got home I ran a more thorough search on my personal copy of the site and found the source, which turned out to be Nic Corelli's "
Phantasms" fiver.
By the way, Valium... don't take this the wrong way, but you REALLY suck at quitting.
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FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short
[03:17]
FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of
scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17]
IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction