July 1

[e of pi]

Odo: Pakleds?
Quark: Yeah. I pay all my employees by the IQ point, and even two of these guys cost less than Rom.
Odo: Is that a good idea? They appear to be using power cables to connect an ancient Japanese board game to your replicator.
Pakled: We look to Go to make us things.

Classic

Dax: Dammit! I've been trying to load Tetris for the past half hour, but all I can get is my grant reapplication form.
Sisko: Maybe the universe wants you to get some work done.
Ops Crew: (general merriment)
Sisko: No, seriously, this is getting weird. Go investigate. If you really want to play Tetris, you can restack the boxes in the cargo bay.

More classic

Bashir: Doesn't this seem a little odd?
O'Brien: What, using the balls to hit a racquet back and forth? Actually, now that you mention it...

Most Classic

Martus: Now what do I do?
Odo: You can come with me to a holding cell.
Martus: On what charge? It's not a crime to break the laws of physics.
Odo: It is on my station. Let's go.

Most Classicer

Quark: -- return his copy of .

Shouldn't there be abook name before the period?

And so I took my first step into darkness....
Sisko: Garak, I need your help. I'll give you whatever it takes.
Garak: Oh, I'm a simple man, Captain. I don't need much. Only... your SOUL!
Sisko: Why do I get the feeling I'll be grimly narrating this later?

More Classicest

Worf: It was an easy victory. The Tenth Fleet was distracted by a planet with shiny rings, and by the time the Betazoid leaders were finished discussing their feelings about the Dominion's arrival, the whole planet was conquered.
Sisko: Damn! We've got to turn this war around before... what's all that noise?
Kira: Odo's holding a "So Much For Lwaxana Troi" party.
Worf: He is? I'm so there!

Unfortunately for me and other staters-of-the-obvious, Deanna wasn't visiting. Competition is so tedious.

I should have seen it coming. This man was clearly nothing but trouble...
Odo: (over the comm) Odo to Sisko. Quark just got stabbed by one Grathon Tolar.
All right, maybe he had a redeeming quality or two.

Most Classicester

Holo-Weyoun: ...at which point the rest of the Romulan fleet will be unable to stop us. What do you think, Damar?
Holo-Damar: DUH. I ARE STOOPID.
Sisko: Garak, are you sure you're the best person to write this script?
Garak: Are you implying that the dialogue is less than true-to-life?

Most Classicestest

Vreenak ranted that it's only okay for the Romulans to lie to us, not the other way around. I can't believe we agreed to that clause in the Treaty of Algeron. He took off and the Federation would have been cosmically hosed, but two days later....
Worf: Oh no -- the Dominion just destroyed some Romulan senator's ship!
O'Brien: Worf, that's great news! It may get them on our side!
Worf: Oh, hey, you're right. I hadn't really thought past somebody other than me getting to kill Romulans.

Moster Classicestest

(PUNCH)
Garak: You hit me! Picard never hit me!
Sisko: This was your plan all along, wasn't it? You knew the forgery wouldn't fool Vreenak!
Garak: Frankly, I'm amazed it fooled you. Tolar whipped it up in ten minutes in Microsoft HoloDocument. I killed him too, by the way.
Sisko: I can't believe this! How could you betray me?
Garak: You know, there's this old Cardassian parable about a scorpion....

Mostest Classicestest

Yet another set of good fivers. Mr. Leslie would give a look of aprroval without saying anything or reacting visually. Might go bridge-diving, though.

[Zeke]

Originally Posted by e of pi

Shouldn't there be a book name before the period?

Fixed. Thanks.

[e of pi]

Originally Posted by Zeke

Fixed. Thanks.

Okay. Glad to help.

[Sa'ar Chasm]

My dad always says not to waste time worrying. That's easy when your biggest worry is a random inspection by the FSPCA, but I had just gambled the entire Federation on a forgery. Hm, maybe Dad should have been worried about that too. Anyway....
Sisko: Well, Senator? How did --
Vreenak: (holding up the data rod) CONNNNNNNNNNN!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

It all started with the casualty list. Every Friday I have to post the latest "Sucks To Be These Casualties" notice from Starfleet.
Bashir: It's all because of those green-blooded Romulans!
O'Brien: You said it. If they didn't turn a blind eye and a pointed ear to the Jem'Hadar crossing their territory....
It was then that I reached a decision: whatever it took, I would convince the Romulans to either enter the war or round off their ears.

*snicker*

Dax: I demand to see proof!
Sisko: Blast, you're right. How can we prove the Dominion is --
Dax: No, proof that you could take down the guards. What's your THAC0?

D&D reference. I highly approve, especially since it's 2nd Ed.

Kira: (over the comm) Sorry to wake you, Captain, but we just got word that Betazed fell to the Dominion.
Sisko: Betazed? I'm going back to sleep. Call me if they get Vulcan.

*znerk*

Worf: It was an easy victory. The Tenth Fleet was distracted by a planet with shiny rings, and by the time the Betazoid leaders were finished discussing their feelings about the Dominion's arrival, the whole planet was conquered.
Sisko: Damn! We've got to turn this war around before... what's all that noise?
Kira: Odo's holding a "So Much For Lwaxana Troi" party.
Worf: He is? I'm so there!

I love this scene for some many different reasons.

Quark: Sure. Let's talk about all the charges I'm going to press. Man, I'm gonna be pressing charges like an Orion pirate. You couldn't press more charges with an industrial charge-presser. It'll be like the Charge of the Press Briga--
Sisko: I get the picture. So... um. Well. What if... money?
Quark: First bribe, huh?
Sisko: Does it show?

This one, too.

Garak: I've found a seller, but he wants to be paid in bio-mimetic gel.
Sisko: What? That stuff is more dangerous than antimatter radiation! Or talking about it, even!
Garak: I'm afraid he wouldn't budge on this point, Captain. It's bio-way or the highway.
Sisko: Groan. Why can't we just give him some of Odo?

There's plenty more Odo where that bit came from. Although...if he doesn't eat or drink, how does he make more goo?

Vreenak ranted that it's only okay for the Romulans to lie to us, not the other way around. I can't believe we agreed to that clause in the Treaty of Algeron. He took off and the Federation would have been cosmically hosed, but two days later....
Worf: Oh no -- the Dominion just destroyed some Romulan senator's ship!
O'Brien: Worf, that's great news! It may get them on our side!
Worf: Oh, hey, you're right. I hadn't really thought past somebody other than me getting to kill Romulans.

Classic Zeke scene.

I liked the chorus line of Troll dolls, and the tables for the running scorecard.

[mudshark]

Originally Posted by Sa'ar Chasm

I liked the chorus line of Troll dolls, and the tables for the running scorecard.

Yeah, liked those, and the addition to the image with Jake's "fermentation" line. Heh.

[Nate the Great]

Yeah, about Vulcan Love Slave. Can anyone remember which episodes mention it? And for that matter, does Part One get a mention before Part Two: the Revenge is?

[e of pi]

I know it's mentioned as one of the two books almost every Ferengi owns. (The other is, of course, the Rules of Aquisition)