30th Anniversary TNG Episode Discussion Marathon

[Nate the Great]

DATA: That is Lal, my daughter.
JULIANA: Your daughter?

No really, why doesn't Juliana know all this stuff already? Data would have an enormous entry at Memory Alpha by now.

DATA: The acoustics in Ten Forward are most favourable.

I doubt that. The very shape of the room is ludicrous in terms of achieving proper acoustics.

JULIANA: Do you think you'll ever try to create an android again?
DATA: Perhaps. I created Lal because I wished to procreate. Despite what happened to her, I still have that wish.
JULIANA: How do you know the same thing won't happen? Creating a stable positronic matrix is very tricky.

I think Data understands that very well, Juliana, you don't need to lay on the guilt! Then again, after the exocomps you'd think he'd have more experimental data to work with. For that matter, he'd know about the EMH project by now and would be using the information from that project as well.

I refer you to the novel Immortal Coil where Flint creates an android based both on Soong tech and Zimmerman tech to try having an immortal mate again. But she falls in love with Data instead.

DATA: I was not aware he created other androids before my brother.
JULIANA: There were three of them. They were like children to us. Losing them was very painful.

I'm having trouble with this idea. B-4 wasn't exactly fully sentient, I shudder to think what the other two were like.

JULIANA: I didn't want to bring you with us. I was afraid if we reactivated you, you'd turn out like Lore. I made Noonian leave you behind.

I'm confused about this one, but that's another screed.

JULIANA: I just don't want you to misunderstand my answer. No, I wouldn't have left you behind if you'd been my biological child.
DATA: Is that because you place more value on biological life than on artificial life?
JULIANA: Absolutely not. I cherished every android your father and I created as if it were my child. Even Lore.

Which raises the question of where Altan Soong came from and where he went. It was made clear that he's not Juliana's son.

RIKER: Why does the scanner read her as a human?
CRUSHER: Because she has a feedback processor designed to send out a false bio-signal.

I'm still dubious about this one. Maybe Soong could upgrade the thing to keep up with advances in tricorder technology, but odds are he didn't get the chance to do so after the Enterprise launched.

SOONG: She was injured when the Crystalline Entity attacked. We made it as far as Terlina Three but, she slipped into a coma. When I realised nothing could be done for her, I built an android. I tried to perfect my synaptic scanning technique so that I could transfer Juliana's memories into a positronic matrix. I didn't know if it would work, but I had to try.

That was Graves' specialty, not Soong's. Another problem is that there was no chance that Soong was able to take all of the necessary equipment from his lab during the evacuation. Are we to believe that he was able to build it IN A CAVE! WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!

DATA: What happened?
SOONG: I made a terrible mistake. I never really let her know how much I loved her. So she left me.

Sheesh, talk about hackneyed soap opera dialogue.

PICARD: Data, there might come some time in the future when she would find out anyway. Another accident, perhaps. Maybe it would be easier for her if she learned the truth from you.
CRUSHER: I can tell you that if I were in her place, I would rather be told by my son than by some stranger.

A good point. I'm glad that they're able to consider the possible ramifications without fear and still trust Data to make the right decision.

DATA: I find I am having difficulty separating what would be best for her from what would be best for me.
TROI: What do you mean?
DATA: If she knew she were an android, we would have something to share. I would no longer be alone in the universe.
TROI: I know how much that means to you, Data.

And this is why Data is such a great character. He can be a bit selfish, but he still wants to do the right thing.

JULIANA: On Atrea there is a saying, that a child born from parents who love each other will have nothing but goodness in his heart. I guess that explains you.

But didn't this same set of parents create Lore?

The Fiver

Captain's Log: We are in orbit of Penthara IV, where... I'm sorry; my heart just isn't in this anymore. Nobody even reads these things. Will! Get over here and finish the log.
First Officer's Log: So there me and Deanna were, all alone --
Captain's Log: --When I threatened to demote Commander Riker to Ensign if he ever tried to turn my logs into dime store dirty novels.
First Officer's Log: Aww.

"You know how much money you can make writing dime novels?" "What?" "A whole lotta dimes." I still miss Legend, it deserved better than what it got. The only good part of it ending is that it freed up Anderson for Stargate SG-1.

Juliana: We put on a pretty good concert, you and I.
Data: Mother, I have noticed that your playing of that piece was flawless. How do you maintain such a level of perfection?
Juliana: I don't, dear. It's a recording.
Data: Ah! Do you carry many different tunes with you?
Juliana: No, only eight tracks at a time.

Eight tracks were before my time, but I thought that their audio fidelity wasn't really that great. That's why LPs lasted for so long.

Data: It appears we've angered the volcano gods. The planet is destabilizing. Starfleet protocol says to sacrifice a virgin to appease their demands.
La Forge: Oh no you don't! Geordi awwway! (runs down passageway)
Data: Okay, Plan B. Invincible man and random visitor.

I want to believe that this is a Joe vs the Volcano reference, but I doubt it.

Soong: You're probably inquiring about the warranty on Juliana. It's expired. So is she. Crystalline Entity, snowflakes, coma. Couldn't stand her dead, so Juliana is the first android to have a consciousness downloaded to it. Gettin' all this?
Data: Actually, there was this one time we, I mean I....
Soong: Quiet Schizoid.

Always nice to see a reference to Ira Graves.

Memory Alpha

* Flanagan's role in "Dax" was before this. The past is the future, the future is the past, the whole thing gives me a headache...

Nitpicker's Guide
* Both Troi and Geordi should've detected that Juliana wasn't human, but they didn't. Oops.
* Soong must've chased Juliana down, deactivated her, put in the chip, and then left. How awkward.
* Phil points out that Soong programmed Juliana to shut down if she learned the truth, saying that this means that Data's quandary is pointless. I would argue that once Data knows about this programming he could deactivate it.
* He wonders how Soong could create such a perfect human facade after Data and Lore. I would argue that with Data and Lore the colonists forced him to make the androids easily identifiable.
* Geordi casually says that Data has an aging program when it was previously established that he's functionally immortal. I get that this is a handwave to explain that Spiner's getting older, but frankly I don't like it. And he never should've appeared in Picard, by the way.

[Nate the Great]

November 29th, 1993, "Parallels"

Fiver by Kira

Oh goody, another "person thought to be insane" episode!

To preface this, I'd like to tell another story about the novel Q-Squared. The actions focus on three timelines: the normal one between this episode and "All Good Things", a variant of the alternate one from "Yesterday's Enterprise", and the alternate first-season one where Jack Crusher is captain, Picard is first officer (and having an affair with Beverly), and Riker was a prisoner of the Romulans for ages (and had a baby with Deanna following the events of "Imzadi"). Due to Q/Trelane shenanigans people from these three timelines are crossing into others and going berserk. He manages to keep his cool and work with people from the different timelines, being more used to reality hopping. It especially comes in handy when dealing with the Tasha Yars (one of whom has been fighting a war against Klingons for years, remember).

The Episode

WORF: Personal log, stardate 47391.2. I am returning from the Bat'leth competition on Forcas Three.

Forcas III will return as the source of the drink in Generations that Data hates but still wants more of.

RIKER: It looks like we're going to have to head into to the Argus Array. This is the third time this year it's stopped relaying data. Starfleet's beginning to think it's more than a simple malfunction. I want you to start a long range scan once we get--

Wouldn't this be Data's job?

RIKER: What's the matter with you?
WORF: Because it is my birthday I assumed that you or one of the others would try to mount an unexpected social gathering.
RIKER: A surprise party? Mister Worf, I hate surprise parties. I would never do that to you.
...
RIKER: I love surprise parties.

While this is a great gag, it seems rather late in the series for Riker to pull a prank like this.

WORF: That was not a Klingon song.
TROI: It wasn't easy to translate. There doesn't seem to be a Klingon word for jolly.

I find this absolutely ridiculous. Klingons are capable of belly laughs that would curl your hair. They know how to party hard. There is much speculation on the internet about this issue. The word for humorous is tlhaQ, joke (noun or verb) is qID, laugh is Hagh, happy is Quch (used in the official translation of "I am not a merry man"), silly is Dogh, etc.

WORF: It is a cast of Alexander's forehead. The ridges of a warrior.

I get the sentiment, even though it seems weird. I suppose the closest that I ever got in my childhood was finger paint palmprints.

PICARD: So, how old are you, Mister Worf?

He's thirty years old. This does seem odd to me given the timeline. It doesn't seem like he was a fresh Academy graduate at Farpoint. His first known posting in canon is the Enterprise, but there's a cut scene from a DS9 episode stating that he was an ensign on the USS Hawk. In the New Frontier novels it's revealed that his only prior ship was the USS Aldrin (where he served at conn).

WORF: One time when I thought I was going to die, I asked you to watch over Alexander. I was wondering if you might consider formalising that arrangement. I want you to be Alexander's Soh-chIm.
TROI: His Soh-chIm?
WORF: You would become his surrogate mother. In case anything ever happened to me, you would be responsible for him.

Do Russians not have a concept of godparents?

TROI: I don't know what to say. It's a great honour. So, that would make me your?
WORF: The closest analogy is step-sister.
TROI: That would make my mother your step-mother.
WORF: I had not considered that. It is a risk I am willing to take.

There doesn't seem to be a term for the relationship between parent and godparent. I guess "family friend" is all we need?

The relationship between Worf and Lwaxana has already been covered. At least Worf knows that Lwaxana likes Alexander and would treat him well.

DATA: We have analysed the imaging logs. It appears the Array was reprogrammed to observe several Federation sites.

They seem to be implying that the Array can only broadcast to one location at a time, which is ridiculous.

LAFORGE: We're only three light years from Cardassian space. They would have easy access to the Array.

Why would you build an array that close to Cardassian space?

NADOR [on viewscreen]: If you don't mind my asking, what exactly is this telescope of yours designed to do?
PICARD: It's a long range subspace Array. We use it for gathering data on astronomical phenomena.
NADOR [on viewscreen]: I'm certain it would never be used to observe a neighbouring species.
PICARD: Certainly not.

And that's why you don't build an array that close to Cardassian space. I'm frankly insulted by the idea that the array was built fast enough that the Cardassians didn't notice until now. I'm also insulted by the idea that the Federation didn't feel the need to consult with the Cardassians before building this thing in the first place. For that matter, why wouldn't the Federation offer to freely give the Cardassians a copy of all data anyway, as a show of good faith.

Frankly this whole scenario is ridiculous. It was made clear in "Emissary" that the ceasefire is tenuous and there are parties on both sides ready to reignite things over something much less important than a sensor array.

WORF [on monitor]: Personal log, stardate 47391.2. There has been a malfunction in the ship's main deflector. It will require two more days of repairs. As a result, I will not be able to compete in the Bat'leth tournament on Forcas Three.

And what does Worf know about repairing deflectors? I'll buy that he can jerry-rig the weapons to fire when heavily damaged, but the shields should be beyond his abilities. And frankly even if he was qualified, this doesn't seem "cancel my vacation"-worthy.

WORF: I do not remember us, you and I, being mates.

I'll forgive his use of "mate" back in "The Emissary", but not here. He's developed too far to not have a better grasp of English. Or is he speaking translated Russian?

(Which raises further questions about whether Starfleet officers are forced to learn English at the Academy, and whether he spoke Russian or Engish with the Roshenkos at home)

WORF: And when did this relationship begin?
DATA: It is my understanding your romantic affiliation began shortly after you recovered from your spinal injury on stardate 45587. It was six months later that you asked Commander Riker for his formal permission to court Counsellor Troi.

I'm dubious on this one. I'll buy that a human would be emotionally vulnerable after a serious injury, but not a Klingon. A Klingon would be training hard to regain his ability to fight. Furthermore, I don't think that Deanna would be willing to wait six months for Worf to feel good about dating her. For that matter tensions between Will and Worf would come to a head FAR before six months. Remember that Tom was with Deanna for a few DAYS before Will was upset.

WORF: And then we mated?
DATA: I am not privy to the exact details of when, where or how your first coupling took place. I could investigate it
WORF: No, that is all right.

And then we come to the elephant in the room. It's well established that Worf is a very...vigorous...lover. Earth females are too fragile and so forth. I don't see him as the kind of guy who would choose to keep himself in check that much. Would he really find that enjoyable?

DATA: Doctor, is Geordi well enough to answer some questions?
OGAWA: (the Doctor) Geordi's dead.

And here's a big misstep. Killing off a main cast member (even an alternate version of one) without attaching any weight to it is just callous.

[Nate the Great]

DATA: I have found the quantum flux in Worf's cellular RNA extends to the subatomic level. It is asynchronous with normal matter. In essence, Captain, Mister Worf does not belong in our universe.
RIKER: What?
DATA: All matter in the universe resonates on a quantum level with a unique signature. That signature is constant. It cannot be changed through any known process. It is the basic foundation of existence.

I like it that they can explain this so easily. And thank goodness we don't have to worry about Worf being thought to be insane anymore.

WORF: If I may inquire, sir, how long have you been Captain of the Enterprise?
RIKER: Four years. Ever since Captain Picard was killed in the incident with the Borg.

Which raises the question of why Shelby isn't First Officer. And for that matter, how The Best of Both Worlds ended in victory. Was his assimilation in that universe just a little more involved and irreversable?

HELM: (a Cardassian) Aye, sir.

The idea that there's a universe where the Bajorans and the Cardassians held the opposite positions raises a LOT of further questions. Did the Bajorans occupy the Cardassian Empire (very unlikely)? Did the Prophets convert the Cardassians to peace when the Bajorans turned away from them?

CRUSHER: And Geordi's visor somehow triggered that effect?
DATA: Exactly. The visor uses a subspace field pulse. I believe that whenever Geordi came near Worf, the field pulse intensified the quantum flux and pushed Worf into another reality.

Which introduces more questions such as why the visor needs a subspace effect and how often the thing cycles enough to trigger a jump.

TROI: What about our children?
WORF: Children?
TROI: You didn't know?

I feel that this bit was unnecessary. If they're on board why wouldn't they have appeared by now, and if they're not why would Deanna bring this up? I suppose the implication is that since the visor is offline Worf won't be making anymore jumps, so Deanna thinks that this Worf is here to stay.

WORF: When the last shift occurred in Sickbay, we did not have any children.
TROI: We have a little girl, Shannara, she's two years old, and a three year old boy, Eric Christopher.

So they got pregnant almost immediately? Does this even allow for the six month trial period before he talked with Will?

WORF: What about Alexander?
TROI: Alexander?
WORF: He was my son in another reality.

I suppose you could argue that in this reality the T'Ong was destroyed somewhere making the events of "The Emissary" not happen.

WORF: Sir, the Bajorans?
TROI: Ever since the Bajorans overpowered the Cardassian Empire, they've become more and more aggressive.

And we have more questions. It's been made clear that most Bajorans don't care about what happens outside their system. Remember that before the wormhole nobody cared about them except the Cardassians. With aggressive Bajorans and no Sisko one can presume that the wormhole hasn't been discovered in this reality. So where are the Bajorans getting resources for their ships?

DATA: The barriers between quantum realties are breaking down. Other realties are emerging into our own.
('and thick and fast they came at last, and more, and more, and more')

Chakoteya is quoting from "The Walrus and the Carpenter". One presumes that he's just showing off like I do from time to time.

DATA: The rate of quantum incursions is increasing exponentially. At this rate, the sector will be completely filled with Enterprises within three days.

Putting aside how an anomaly that's randomly spitting out Enterprises isn't making any of them overlap and go boom, what counts as "completely filled"? Bare hull against bare hull, or treating the shield bubbles as gumballs in a machine?

(a bad signal and a Riker with a full ragged beard)
RIKER [on viewscreen]: We won't go back. You don't know what it's like in our universe. The Federation's gone, the Borg is everywhere! We're one of the last ships left. Please, you've got to help us!
RIKER: I'm sorry, there's no choice. If this works, everything will return to
RIKER [on viewscreen]: No, we won't go back!

A big problem with this premise is how the Enterprise can survive without support for four years. And why the Borg haven't destroyed them, for that matter.

WORF: Deanna. You do not have to leave.
TROI: Oh?
WORF: I have not had dinner. Would you care to join me?
TROI: I'd love to.
WORF: Champagne.

Like I've already said, I never liked the Worf/Troi romance. It never made sense. They want different things. Furthermore, she's already established herself as a necessary component of Alexander's life. If things go south (which they will in the novel Imzadi II) and she leaves, Alexander will suffer.

(Oh, and Worf should've asked for two champagnes, too).

The Fiver

Worf: (swaying) I feel dizzy. Wait a minute -- Geordi, weren't you and and Data just on opposite sides of this console?
La Forge: We're playing "musical stations."
Worf: But where is Captain Picard?
Data: He failed to find a station when the music stopped.

Ha ha.

Crusher: "This trophy is hereby awarded to Worf for his shameful loss, terrible bat'telh skills, and really bad goatee. Ha ha, Worf."
Worf: That's a lie! My goatee looks great!

Over at TV Tropes we call this "Comically missing the point."

Memory Alpha

* Tasha was going to appear, but they didn't want to step of "Yesterday's Enterprise"'s toes. Frankly I would've kept her and ditched the whole Worf/Troi thing.
* This was still in the "you have to pay to use Happy Birthday" era, so they had to substitute For He's a Jolly Good Fellow. I understand, but I still hate that "no word for jolly" joke.
* Only appearance of a Cardassian in a Starfleet uniform until Discovery.
* Frakes also hated the Worf/Troi relationship.
* Roberto Orci cited this episode as an excuse for the Prime and Kelvinverse universes existing simultaneously. I feel that this isn't needed, we've seen enough "small change makes new timeline" alternate realities going all the way back to TOS.

Nitpicker's Guide

* How come Worf's the only thing on the shuttle to bounce around between realities? His uniform and trophy were there, too.
* Phil also brings up Troi's fragility, and specifically wonders if she'd allow Worf to dig his fingernails into her palm as part of the mating ritual.
* Despite being on the Cardassian border, the Argus Array can somehow take pictures of Utopia Planitia, which is around Mars!
* Phil thinks that the exposion of the Borg-rattled Enterprise should've damaged some of the ships around it.
* When Worf unwraps the painting he's holding it with a certain edge up. Then Deanna takes it and flips it over, indicating that she thinks it looks better that way. But then when we see it on the wall it's in the original orientation. Oops.

[Nate the Great]

January 10th, 1994, "The Pegasus"

I will not be doing a comparison to "These Are The Voyages". That'll wait until the Enterprise retrospective in 2035.

Fiver by Marc

The Episode

(it's Captain Picard Day - children's arts and crafts - and the judging is taking place)

Always a good bit. Now it's traditionally celebrated on June 16th.

RIKER: (imitating Picard and using a doll) I don't know. I think the resemblance is rather striking. Wouldn't you agree, Number One?

Hehe.

WORF [OC]: Worf to Captain. Incoming transmission from Admiral Blackwell. It is coded Priority One.
PICARD: Put it through, Mister Worf.

To the conference room? He could be in the ready room in under thirty seconds! Yeah, I know it's so Blackwell can see the Captain Picard Day banner, but you don't get to throw logic out the window for the sake of a gag in Star Trek (unless it's animated, I suppose...)

BLACKWELL [on monitor]: The Enterprise is to rendezvous with the starship Crazy Horse in sector one six zero seven immediately.

As a midwest native I'm well aware of the controversies surrounding the Crazy Horse memorial. It's been under construction for over seventy years and won't be finished for several decades still. I did research into his life to determine if he would appreciate a starship being named after him, but didn't find anything conclusive. I suspect not.

BLACKWELL [on monitor]: You're authorised to exceed warp speed limitations for the duration of this assignment.

And here we go. Three episodes later and we're already breaking our own rules. The worst part is that this is a bad idea. Surely the Romulans would be able to scan the Enterprise, see that it's going past Warp 5, and conclude that this is important. If the Enterprise looked like it was doing a casual survey it would trick the Romulans, at least for a time.

PICARD: Yes. Oh, you'll be interested to know that I've arranged for a Commander Riker Day next month. I'm even considering making an entry myself.

I wonder what kind of art Captain Picard would do. Even before the Kataan experienced he seemed more like a music guy than a physical art guy.

PRESSMAN: Will. I'll bet you never thought you'd see me again.
(everyone say hi! to Terry O'Quinn, eventually to be John Locke on Lost)

I knew I saw this guy somewhere else (never watched Lost), and I was right. I know him better as Howard Hughes in The Rocketeer! I really should get around to watching The Aviator one of these days...

PRESSMAN: As you know, the starship Pegasus...

You'd think by now the words "as you know" would be banned from all scripts. All it would take is a "For those of you who don't know..." I'll buy that Picard would remember the Pegasus incident, and maybe Troi has taken it upon herself to know about Will's career, but nobody else has a reason to know about this. And incidentally, this stuff should've been in the mission packet and already read by everyone before Pressman even arrived.

WORF: Sir, Romulan warbird decloaking directly ahead.
WORF: They are powering weapons.

I had a whole screed planned about which side had the right to power weapons first, but it turns out that we don't know who the Devolin system belongs to. Ugh. This should've been established in the briefing. If we're in Federation space the Romulans shouldn't be here while cloaked, that's an act of war. If we're in Romulan space the Enterprise should've asked for permission to do this "scientific research."

Even so, I hate it when Romulans or anyone else jumps to "power weapons" right away without even attempting to talk first.

PRESSMAN: How long have you had that beard?
RIKER: About four years. I got tired of hearing how young I looked.

Actually Will got the beard somewhere between the first and second seasons, around stardate 42000. The current stardate is around 47500, that's five and a half years, not four. And putting aside why Frakes grew the beard, he really did have a babyface in the first season. I still don't get why he shaved it off in Insurrection, he looked horrible (even if it did give us that great "smoother than an android's bottom" scene).

PICARD: As a matter of fact, I never met Will until he reported on board at Farpoint Station.
PRESSMAN: You chose your first officer without ever meeting him?

Yeah, that seems a bit stupid. By all means, let his record help narrow the field of candidates, but there should still be a formal interview.

PICARD: There was an incident on Altair Three when Will was First Officer of the Hood. He refused to let Captain DeSoto beam down during a crisis. He disobeyed a direct order and he risked a general court martial because he thought he was right. When I read that, I knew that I had found my Number One.
PRESSMAN: You wanted someone with a history of disobedience?
PICARD: I wanted someone who would stand up to me. Someone who was more concerned with the safety of the ship and accomplishing the mission than with how something looked on his record. To me, that's one of the marks of a good officer.
PRESSMAN: Frankly, I've always felt it was more important for an officer to trust his captain's judgment. In a crisis, there's no time for explanations. Orders have to be obeyed without question or lives may be lost.

I don't like Pressman's idea of "I'm Captain, therefore I'm right, everyone else exists only to serve me." Once again I want to bring up Surak's "I'm pleased to see that we have differences" and the IDIC. Pressman is being short-sighted here. Not every disagreement with a captain's orders happens during a crisis, he's using too broad a brush.

RIKER: I can't believe how stupid I was.
CRUSHER: You both must have got a little carried away, that's all.
RIKER: No, it was my fault. I got distracted at a crucial moment.
CRUSHER: It can happen to anyone.
RIKER: I knew what I was supposed to do and I didn't do it. If those had real bat'leths I might be dead right now.

I get that Will is distracted, but this moral is far too hamfisted. Furthermore, what's the point of telling it to Crusher instead of Picard?

LAFORGE: Commander, I think we might have just struck paydirt. There's a subspace resonance signature coming from that asteroid. From the frequency variances, it looks like the pattern from a Federation warp core.

You shouldn't have to be on top of a location to detect a subspace resonance signature. The writers haven't even handwaved some sensor-blocking mineral in the asteroid that would slow things down.

RIKER: I recommend we destroy the asteroid. It would take most of our photon torpedoes, but it would preclude any possibility of the Pegasus falling into Romulan hands.
PRESSMAN: Our top priority is to salvage the ship, Commander. I'll consider destroying it only as a last resort.
RIKER: Yes, sir.

And now's when we run into a big problem. I refuse to believe that Starfleet Intelligence (or Section 31, which fanon has put Pressman) wouldn't keep records on how to build a phase cloak. The idea that this device is the only way that the Federation will have cloaks is ridiculous. Pressman is deluded, the top priority is stopping the Romulans from finding out that Starfleet was doing cloaking research.

PRESSMAN: What the hell is the matter with you? Destroy the Pegasus before we've even taken a look at it?
RIKER: I thought it was more important that the Romulans
PRESSMAN: Well, you were wrong! We have a chance here to change the balance of power in this quadrant, but we can't very well do that if we destroy the Pegasus, now can we?

So it's official. No plans, no backup, just this one device that we'll have to recreate the tech from. How asinine.

Change the balance of power? I thought Starfleet was doing a pretty good job of that! Furthermore, right now we're still having trouble with the Cardassians, why ignite a war with the Romulans?

RIKER: I was seven months out of the Academy, my head still ringing with words like duty and honour.

I'll grant duty, but "honor" gives me more trouble. The idea that "honor" is derived from duty alone is patently ridiculous. Worf proved that over and over again!

PICARD: Agreed. What about a shuttle? We could send it down through one of these fissures.
DATA: I would recommend against it, sir. There may be gravimetric or magnetic fluctuations inside the asteroid which would overpower the engines of a shuttlecraft.

Gravimetric fluctuations? The amount and location of rock seems pretty constant to me. Couldn't they have thrown in some technobabble mineral that would confuse the sensors of a shuttle, but not the Enterprise?

PICARD: Admiral, if is passage narrows to less than five hundred metres, I will abort the mission.

Ugh. The ship itself is 467 meters wide! I'd want the walls of this chasm to be much farther away than 20 meters! And I'm sure that the width of the shield bubble is much more than 500 meters!

RIKER: It looks if half the ship materialised inside solid rock.
DATA: Yes, sir. I do not understand how this could have happened.
PRESSMAN: Let's keep the speculation to a minimum. We have to begin the salvage operation.

How does Pressman still think that he can go over there, retrieve the phase cloak, and return to Starfleet Intelligence (cough-Section 31-cough) without the Enterprise crew or the Romulans finding out?

[Nate the Great]

DATA: The starboard bulkhead of main Engineering is contained within the rock face, but most of its compartment is still intact.
WORF: There is a hull breach in that section.
PICARD: If we begin a power transfer, can we restore life support systems to that compartment?
DATA: I believe so, sir. The breach can be temporarily sealed by extending our shields.

I'm dubious of this one. You're going to use the shields to create a bubble that you can fill with air, then...what? How is there a power network intact enough to power the heaters, the lights, the gravity, etc.? They should've just skipped straight to the spacesuits.

RIKER: It means that I can't put this off any longer. Right up until this moment I had the luxury of time, but now I've got to make a choice. And, Admiral, I'm afraid my choice is this. I can't let you start these experiments again. It was wrong twelve years ag
And he's going to stop Pressman...how? Shooting the cloak? o, and it is wrong today.
Shooting Pressman? Furthermore, this isn't just about Pressman, it's about Starfleet Intelligence (cough-Section 31-cough). Someone else will come for it whether Riker is in a brig or not.

PRESSMAN: So on reflection you'd rather be a traitor than a hero.
RIKER: I wasn't a hero and neither were you.

So Pressman thinks that giving Starfleet cloaking devices will make him a hero. How? It would start a war with the Romulans that the Federation can't afford right now, much less in a matter of months when the Dominion enters the scene. Think about it, if the Federation, Klingons, and Romulans started a war now the Cardassians would quickly join to reclaim Bajor and the Federation wouldn't have the resources to stop them. The Dominion would know what's going on and quietly wait until the Alpha Quadrant powers have destroyed themselves so they can swoop in and conquer the pieces.

RIKER: They were brave enough to risk their lives to stop you from violating a treaty the Federation signed in good faith.
PRESSMAN: That treaty has bound our hands and given the Romulans a tactical advantage for the last sixty years. I was simply trying to level the playing field.

And now we reach the big question: why did the Federation agree to not use cloaks? Had the Romulans defeated us so badly that we were willing to do ANYTHING to stop the fighting? And after this happened, after we gave the Romulans a huge advantage, they decide to go into isolation for decades? To build a fleet of ships bigger than even the Galaxy class currently being designed?

The real headscratcher is why the Romulans didn't invade after the Borg invasion. Starfleet was in no position to oppose them, especially after the ceasefire with the Cardassians.

WORF: Captain, I believe we could use the phasers to cut our way out.
DATA: The asteroid's internal structure is highly unstable. Any attempt to cut through the rock could cause the entire chasm to collapse.

I find this overly simplistic. Surely you guys can replicate some concrete or foam to stabilize the walls as you cut. It would take a long time, but it'd be doable.

PRESSMAN: And that treaty is the biggest mistake we ever made. It's kept us from exploiting a vital area of defence.
PICARD: That treaty has kept us in peace for sixty years, and as a Starfleet officer, you're supposed to uphold it.

Peace? The Romulans orchestrated the Klingon Civil War, and the Federation knows it! There should've been renegotiations years ago!

RIKER: It's more than just a cloak. It changes the structure of matter. In theory, a ship using this device could pass through normal matter.

It's been said before, and I'll say it again: why do we need the cloaking function on top of the phasing function? A phased ship would be impervious to weapons fire, wouldn't it? Otherwise what's the point of the phasing?

PICARD: Except it's illegal. It's in violation of an agreement that the Federation signed in good faith.

And the Romulans didn't sign it in good faith. It's situations like this that make Section 31 seem more and more necessary. "Evil will always triumph because good is dumb" and all that.

LAFORGE: Commander, we've routed the impulse engines through the plasma conduits, but you'll have to watch the intercooler levels. If they get too high, we'll blow the entire relay system.

Why are we sending impulse plasma (ionized gas) through the warp plasma conduits? Why is that even an option?

While it seems reasonable to suppose that an ordinary cloak is a sister technology to the shields, a phase cloak would probably be a sister technology to the warp field. No need for impulse engine interaction at all.

RIKER: I think that's what happened twelve years ago. The cloak blew out the plasma relays on the Pegasus after we left the ship. The plasma ignited in space, and it looked as if the ship had been destroyed.

Nonsense. Even if we presume that every bit of matter of the ship was converted to energy (dubious, but IF), it would still have an energy signature that'd be different from ignited plasma.

[Nate the Great]

The Fiver

Picard: To what do we owe your gladsome presence?
Sirol: We're doing perfectly innocent research on gaseous anomalies.
Picard: Is that anything like hot air?
Sirol: Yes, and we're detecting lots of it.

Ha ha. "You're reaching a 9.9 on the Kirk scale!"

Pressman: Our orders are to secretly break the law for the good of the Federation
Riker: What? Are you working for some covert branch of Starfleet Intelligence?
Pressman: Shhh! No one's supposed to know that it exists yet!

Actually I think Section 31 would be a completely different organization that pretends to be a covert branch of Starfleet Intelligence. It's not like they're held accountable to any public organization.

Picard: Why did you defend Pressman when the Pegasus senior officers mutinied against him?
Riker: If you'd seen so many promotion vacancies open up, what would you have done?

I don't know if I find this one morbid or funny.

Riker: The secret cloaking device is intact, sir.
Pressman: Yippee! Now we can resume our illegal experiments and kill more people!
Riker: How many people does it take, Admiral, before it becomes wrong?
Pressman: Don't you start planning an insurrection against me, mister!

The Insurrection reference seems like a bit of a stretch to me.

Riker: This one-of-a-kind phasing cloak allows ships to travel through solid matter!
La Forge: It sounds just like the one we caught the Romulans testing two years ago.
Riker: No, theirs was called an "interphase generator."
La Forge: Oh. I forgot that.

And somehow the interphase generator could attach a phase cloak aura to an object without the need for further intervention. That still doesn't make sense...

Memory Alpha

* Ronald Moore compares this one to "The First Duty". I don't see it. That episode features people breaking the rules solely for glory, this episode (and "The Wounded", for that matter) features people breaking the rules in a misguided attempt to achieve superiority.
* Moore joked that the sheer number of crazy admirals might come from something they add to the water at Starfleet headquarters.
* In the first draft Riker was sentenced to thirty days in the brig and a reprimand that would stop any chance of command. I think this harsh, and feel that long-term sentencing to a brig should be avoided when possible. Riker should've been moved off the ship to a penal colony or something instead.
* The staff considered reusing Pressman on Deep Space Nine. I'm not sure how they could without either seriously reworking the character or rehashing this episode.

Nitpicker's Guide

* Phil is confused as to how the Romulans could have a piece of debris from the Pegasus if the ship didn't actually explode. Duh, there was an explosion of warp plasma that still happened, no doubt a few deckplates were blown off leaving the rest of the ship damaged but intact.
* Phil also noticed the problem with the "had a beard for four years" thing.
* References are made to both "Starfleet Security" and "Starfleet Intelligence" watching this mission. I don't have a problem with the latter being a subset of the former.
* Phil also noticed the size of the ship/size of the crevasse thing.
* Picard acts like the ship is trapped and couldn't be rescued, yet Starfleet knows where they went and would send a rescue ship. And presumably the Enterprise could send some sort of signal to the outside (given enough time I'm sure phasers at low intensity could drill through to send a probe, for example).
* One of Phil's readers brought up the diplomatic incident from decloaking in front of the Romulans. I don't have a problem with this one. For the sake of argument let's say that the Enterprise did stay cloaked for days. The Romulas would still slowly dig through the asteroid to claim their prize and raise a fuss when the Enterprise isn't there and a ship half-buried in the asteroid is. Picard is just starting the inevitable incident on his own terms.
* When Tom Riker is found, will he have to face charges for the Pegasus incident? Come to think of it, that would've been a better reason to join the Maquis...
* There's confusion in the Treaty of Algernon. Was it the treaty that ending the Earth-Romulan war in 2160, or is it the one that banned Federation cloaking devices sixty years ago? I wonder if Phil has heard of the concept of "amendments" and that treaties can evolve.
* Phil wonders if they should've separated the ship and just taken the stardrive section into the asteroid. My immediate response is that the saucer would be a sitting duck for the Romulans.
* The Romulans act like there'd be no problem beaming the crew through all that rock, when Riker thinks that it's risky. I don't have a problem with Romulan transporter sensors being more powerful. For that matter, what about the subspace transporter from "Bloodlines"? Cumulatively dangerous, but surely one exposure to save everyone would be allowed?

[Nate the Great]

January 17th, 1994, "Homeward"

No fiver

The Episode

Captain's log, stardate 47423.9. We have arrived at Boraal Two in response to an emergency distress call from Lieutenant Worf's foster brother, Nikolai Rozhenko. He has been stationed on the planet as a cultural observer.

Is Nikolai stationed alone? It sounds strange. It's not like he couldn't hide his evacuation plans from the others.

PICARD: Very well. But regardless of this planet's immediate situation, we must observe the Prime Directive. I want to minimise the risk of contact with the inhabitants. You will go alone, Mister Worf, and I want to have you surgically altered so that you could pass as a Boraalan.

I don't think that this situation justifies a single man away team. Frankly Data shouldn't have been alone back in "Thine Own Image" either.

CRUSHER: Are the two of you close?
WORF: We are brothers.

Yikes is that a loaded answer. I couldn't describe my relationship with my own brother any more easily.

NIKOLAI: When I sent the distress call I knew the Enterprise was in this sector...

How? Couldn't they have at least have given Nikolai a shuttlecraft that was damaged in the storms? Something that allowed him to scan ships in orbit?

PICARD: Doctor, you were fully aware that the atmospheric dissipation could not be stopped. What did you hope to accomplish by assisting these people?
NIKOLAI: I was trying to give them a future. What I propose is we create an atmospheric shield on the planet. We can camouflage the equipment just as was done with my observation post. No one will ever know it's there.

A big problem with this idea is that it would require a Federation presence on the planet for centuries to come. And these people are clearly thousands of years away from warp.

And then of course the second big problem is inbreeding. This village must rely on intermingling with other villages for marriage partners. Now they're gone. They will wonder why only their village survived, and why they can't find anyone else. New planet or not, this culture is doomed unless the Federation directly intervenes and starts controlling everything. Nikolai seems content to just shove consequences onto someone else. Who cares if his great-grandchildren have six toes?

NIKOLAI: Captain, the Boraalans have a rich and beautiful culture, a deep spiritual life. They deserve the chance to survive.

And? The Federation must've let dozens of primitive cultures just like this die by now.

NIKOLAI: And isn't that what the Prime Directive was truly intended to do, to allow cultures to survive and grow naturally?
TROI: Not entirely. The Prime Directive was designed to ensure non-interference.

I'll refer you to the SF Debris review. Nikolai is talking about the long-term goal of the Prime Directive, Troi is talking about what the Federation does to ensure that.

CRUSHER: But aren't we interfering either way? If we take no action, it's a conscious decision to let the Boraalans die.

Say what you will about the Prime Directive, but at least it's not biased. No warp drive, you're not saved. Period. It doesn't matter if you're peaceful or warlike, if you're destroying the planet or living in harmony with nature, the PD applies to you equally.

We already covered this in "First Contact". Any interference, no matter how well-intentioned, will inevitably cause disaster.

NIKOLAI: Some of my log recorders are still in my observation post. They contain most of my research. Since it appears that the only way I'm going to preserve Boraalan culture is in a museum, I request permission to return to the surface and retrieve them.

If there can't be a ship to support Nikolai, there should've at least have been a subspace satellite in orbit to pass along his files to Memory Alpha.

NIKOLAI: I knew if I could get access to your ship's computer, I could generate a replica of the caves. The hard part was transporting the Boraalans into the holodeck without anybody on the Enterprise noticing.

No, the hard part is transporting them without everyone asking why they all saw blue sparkles for a few seconds at the same time. Did Nikolai knock them all out at night so they wouldn't notice the transport?

NIKOLAI: Captain, I can't prepare for every contingency, but I assure you I'm accustomed to thinking on my feet. I'll deal with the situation as it evolves.

I'm reminded of that speech from Trek '09 about Kirk thinking that he'll never have to face consequences.

(Now that the Kelvinverse trilogy is free on YouTube I intend to watch them as part of my retrospective on the movies. But that will be next summer at minimum, when I finish TNG I'll have to go straight into Voyager).

PICARD: I'm not enthusiastic about this plan, but I don't see that we have another option.

Well, you could flood the holodeck with anesthizine gas and then euthanize them. Or you could ask Starfleet for further orders. While we've seen starship captains change the destinies of entire cultures in TOS, I thought we had more oversight now.

LAFORGE: We've got a problem, sir. I don't think it's going to be possible to keep this holodeck simulation stable.
PICARD: Why not?
LAFORGE: The plasmonic energy surges from the planet are affecting the ship's systems. We're having problems with the EPS systems and the power distribution matrix.
NIKOLAI: And as a result, the holodeck imaging processor has been severely destabilised.

Why are we still in orbit of the planet? It's uninhabitable!

LAFORGE: It's not a question of whether the simulation will break down, it's a question of when.
PICARD: There's no way round it?
LAFORGE: Not while it's running. In order to fix it, I'd have to shut down all of the holodecks and re-initialise the entire system.

You can't reset the holodecks individually? That seems like an obvious design flaw. This seems like the time to stun all of them and put them in stasis until the holodecks can be reset somewhere aware from the storms.

WORF: As we said, it is far from here. It will not be like the home you knew. Even the stars may be different.
VORIN: Why would they be different?

A good point. I'll bet you anything Nicolai gave no thought to this one, or the sun looking different, or the plants and animals looking different, or...

WORF: You have not changed. You still expect people to solve the problems you create.
NIKOLAI: I'm not here to work out the issues of our childhood. I'm here to save a people who I care about.

How is this guy supposed to be brilliant again? Brilliant people don't expect others to solve their problems for them.

DATA: These are the two planets which best match our search criteria. Draygo Four features an unusually large temperate zone. However, it is within three light years of Cardassian space.
CRUSHER: There are constant border disputes in that sector.

Why did Data even present it as an option then?

CRUSHER: There are so many questions we don't have answers to. What if the climate is so different that it affects them in a way that we can't anticipate? How do we even know they'll be able to survive? And if they do, how will their society evolve and what impact will it have on the Vaccan system?

"For that matter, we don't know how they'll react to the diseases unique to this planet!"

VORIN: Then how do you teach your children their history, who their ancestors were, where they come from?
WORF: We tell each other stories, make up songs.
VORIN: Stories change with each person who tells them. This, this will always be the same.

A good point. I think people today don't appreciate how big of a deal the printing press was.