Words of Wisdom - by Celeste

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[color=#000000ost_uid0]When we drink, we get buzzed. When we get buzzed, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven! --Brian O'Rourke

If drinking is evil, then why did Jesus turn water to wine?

Which is worse: Ignorance or Apathy? Who knows? Who cares?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

If someone with multiple personality disorder threatens to kill themselves, is it considered suicide or a hostage situation?

Does killing time damage eternity?

Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

Why can't you make another word using all the letters in "anagram"?

If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?

Why do they call it "chili" if it's hot?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Who's cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?

Why does monosyllable have so many syllables?

Why isn't the word 'phonetically' spelled like it sounds?

If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast on the back of a cat and dropped it?

You know how most packages say "Open here". What should you do if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?[/colorost_uid0]