Five-Minute "The Killing Game"
Klingon Janeway: Today is a good day to -- GAK!|
Alpha Hirogen: Man, even Neelix would make a better Klingon than you.
Seven: LA la la la la LA... you know, I find it much easier to remember these lyrics now that I'm brainwashed.
Janeway: Hi. I'm a restaurant owner, not a starship captain.
Janeway: We need more supplies. Go get some radio stuff.
Beta Hirogen: I hate you and wish you were dead.
Janeway: This top-secret meeting of the Maquis will now come to order.
Alpha: So tell me, why are you Germans better than everybody else?
Beta: To heck with the hands-off policy. Die, Talaxian swine!
Alpha: The holodecks still aren't big enough. Keep expanding them.
Kim: Doc, you have to help me fight these Hirogen.
Alpha: Our society is doomed. We can save it only by playing games on the holodeck.
Doc: ...and then I'll deactivate the brainwashing gizmo, restoring your mind.
Seven: LA la la la la L--ohhhhhh heck, I just forgot the words.
Chakotay: Tomorrow we macho Americans attack. Our mission: save the French.
Janeway: Okay, here's the plan. Tuvok will wander the streets firing a machine gun, Torres will somehow guard the restaurant despite her pregnancy, and Seven will -- um, Seven, please stop sabotaging our grenades.
Kim: So the plan works like this: I secretly do something on the bridge, then Seven secretly does something on the holodeck, then you secretly do something in sickbay, then we're all caught and we end up freeing only Janeway.
Janeway: Here we are in the Nazi bunker.
Hirogen: Hey! Stop freeing the prisoners!
Janeway: Hey, you're betraying me! I'll have to make you die.
Neelix: Hi, look at me, I'm a Klingon, this is my token scene in Part I, yada yada.
Tuvok: Eat flaming death, Hirogen Nazi scum!
Paris: Whew! I think I escaped Tuvok....
Nazi Headquarters: KABOOM
Kim: Uh oh. That explosion somehow blew the Holodeck open.
Tuvok: There seems to be a big glowing hole in the universe.
Seven: ....and that's what happened in Part I.|
Janeway: We need a plan. Mine is to un-brainwash everybody.
Seven: That's much better than mine was.
Janeway: What was yours?
Seven: Four words: "army of jet-propelled penguins."
Kim: The holodeck's gone crazy. We should shut it down.
Chakotay: Thanks for the help, my froggy friends. Now get lost so we macho Americans can save your derrières.
Paris: I see you're pregnant. Either that or you've been eating way too many éclairs.
Janeway: We're back! We miraculously survived the destruction of the bunker.
Janeway: I've decided not to shoot Seven.
Paris: Hmm...you're Asian. This being World War II, I'd better shoot you unless you can prove you're from America.
Janeway: I need to un-brainwash the crew.
Hirogen: DIE! DIE! DIEDIEDIEDIEDIE!
Chakotay: Ouch...a six-O explosion. That'll take a while to fix.
Tuvok: Hey, suddenly I remember! I'm not a boring French Resistance guy, I'm a boring Vulcan guy!
Klingons: Let's go fight.
Janeway: You jerk. You've been torturing my people.
Beta: Sing, Borg girl.
Alpha: (over the comm) Pack up the guns -- we're wimping out.
Doc: The others need help.
Janeway: You expanded the holodecks? But just one is enough to--
Kim: I can now shut down the holodeck at will, but I'll still set the timer for nine minutes. That'll teach Janeway not to promote me.
Janeway: If you move, I'll shoot you.
Captain's Log: We kicked their butts! Yahoo!
Janeway: Have some holodeck tech.
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DISCLAIMER: A lot of stuff in here is copyrighted by Paramount Pictures. My intent isn't to infringe on that; I and those like me are just having a little fun in the universe Gene Roddenberry created. I don't think he'd mind.
All material © 2001, Zeke.