Link Thread

[Zeke]

In the interest of keeping the other threads tubelike, I have created this thread to serve as a dump truck. Post funny links here rather than starting new threads for them. By doing so, you will resist the temptation to make link posts in your blog instead, which is a good way to post frequently but a bad way to post memorably.

FIRST! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ciG-Xs7mBwU)

[Zeke]

And second. This is so wrong. (http://www.teamspecialolympics.com/comic.php?sec=archive&auth=Scribblettes&cid=scrib/00059.gif)

[Nate the Great]

Okay, how about Strange Candy?

http://www.strangecandy.net/

A must-read webcomic for any fan of the cultural benefits we've recieved from Japan.

Or the Standard Galactic Alphabet?

http://www.ultrazone.org/sga/?msg=fiver

I even input the word "fiver" in there so you can all see how a Vorticon would spell it.

[Chancellor Valium]

You can do anything you want at ZOMBO COM (www.zombo.com)!

:D :D :D :D

[Nate the Great]

Uh, does that website have some weird hyperlink that I'm just not finding?

[ijdgaf]

Dude. You can do ANYTHING at Zombo COM.

[Nate the Great]

Okay, I found the site, but I'm still lost.
(Maybe you should try Harry Krisna)
Who said that? :)

[Zeke]

Google it, Nate. Zombo's been around for a while.

[Nate the Great]

Yeah, I must not be hitting the magic keys, because I'm not seeing anything that amazing. Let's move on, shall we?

[Chancellor Valium]

Is it possible...

Do we have...

a Sanite in our midst?

[Zeke]

More like a contrarian.

He'll probably disagree.

[AKAArzosah]

http://www.kontraband.com/show/show.asp?ID=5870&CAT=games&NSFW=0&rtn=search-5870&Keywords=impossible

The Impossible Quiz: be prepared to waste several hours. Whoever originally gave me this link must die.

[Nate the Great]

I have to thank you once again for including my goat-people quote in your sig. It makes me smile every time.

[Zeke]

Hey Nate, do you remember the Strange Candy reference I once made at this site?

The Impossible Quiz: be prepared to waste several hours. Whoever originally gave me this link must die.

Not before you die for passing it on. Fortunately, the MegaMan Battle Network games have given me good practice with quizzes that pointlessly force you to start over again and again.

Seriously, while it's very annoying, it's also just the kind of humour I like. It reminds me of the classic adventure games like Space Quest. (In fact, the same method of solution is applicable: you can eventually win by trying every possible click.)

Mathematicians and geeks in general love this sort of trickery, so I've been making good speed through the questions. Do you know how many there are? I'm calling it quits for tonight at 63 or so.

(Two points for anyone else trying the quiz. One, a little knowledge of 4chan running jokes will serve you well. Two, don't try to cheat with Tab. The game boots you if you do, sorta like how adventure games would punish you for swearing into the interpreter or using information your character doesn't have yet.)

[AKAArzosah]

Only 63? Quitter!
Oh, and there is 110. I know this because I cheated, and looked it up. By the way, DON'T USE ANY SKIPS! You need them all to pass the last question.

Merely trying trial and error won't work forever, either. This I know from experience (stupid horseshoes).

[PointyHairedJedi]

Bob the Angry Flower does Star Control (http://www.angryflower.com/moreco.html)

Bob the Angry Flower does... The Internet (http://www.angryflower.com/strife.html)

:D

[AKAArzosah]

*stares blankly*

Um, yeah...

*backs away slowly*

[AKAArzosah]

http://www.stupid.com/index.html

I particularly like their candy sushi. Pity they only ship in the USA.

[Derek]

Bob the Angry Flower does Star Control (http://www.angryflower.com/moreco.html)
That is hilarious. I love Star Control. I'm glad Bob the Angry Flower does too.

I don't know if this has ever been pointed out here, but there's a guy who essentially does five-minute video parodies of Yu-gi-oh that he calls Yu-gi-oh the Abridged Series. I've never read or watched or whatevered Yugioh, but I've found these to be hilarious.
http://jentsproductions.com/littlekuriboh/

[Chancellor Valium]

Has anyone else seen the (various) 404 page(s) for livejournal? They're quite good for wasting about 2 minutes...

The Surrealist (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/) I found after the dungeon fad on LJ. It's good for wasting time.

I particularly like This (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/priorart.cgi)

:D

[Nate the Great]

I concur on Yu-gi-oh: The Abridged Series. Thanks for the download link, as well, I thought they were just on Youtube. Oh, and I HAVE seen Yu-gi-oh (boy, have I ever...), and I've played the card game (ditto), and they are even funnier when you get the references.

Z, for all I know you made a reference and I tracked down the link. Or whatever. When you're online everything starts to blur together. That doesn't dispute the fact that it's a great webcomic.

Is the goat-people thing from Strange Candy? I did searches on Yahoo and Google, and basically when you enter "turns into goat people," it spits back all of the signatures from this forum and nothing else.

[mudshark]

Has anyone else seen the (various) 404 page(s) for livejournal? They're quite good for wasting about 2 minutes...

Best 404 page ever:

http://www.acm.uiuc.edu/errors/404.html

[PointyHairedJedi]

The chronicles of Chad Vader (http://www.splu.net/chadvader.htm) are surprisingly funny.

[ijdgaf]

I'm (not) going to assume everyone has seen the PG-rated cut of 300 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gNqiSkd1M6k).

[AKAArzosah]

The LJ Dungeon is quite entertaining!

You have died in the Dungeon of Commodore Zeke!
I killed Gatac and Nahtmmm, but I was killed in a cold laboratory by Catalina Marina the cockatrice. Amongst many things I had a Sword of Megaman, and a figurine of AKA Arzosah.

[Zeke]

Urban Dictionary (http://www.urbandictionary.com), of course, is an indispensable resource. It has taught me such perfectly Zeke-descriptive terms as "email paralysis" and "spockmate." But if I'd had any doubts about the value of the site, they were erased today. I looked up "stupid," "lucky," "fraud," and "homer" -- and in each case, someone had submitted the definitions shown in the classic Simpsons episode "Homer Defined." For instance:

<b>fraud</b>
(n) 1. Imposter.
2. Fake.
3. Homer Simpson.

You have to page way back for the "stupid" one, but it's there. I love the internet.

The chronicles of Chad Vader (http://www.splu.net/chadvader.htm) are surprisingly funny.

No kidding! That idea turned out way funnier than I expected.

[MaverickZer0]

Arsozah? You linked the impossible quiz. I hate you now.

[AKAArzosah]

It's nice to be popular.

[Hejira]

In case no one's seen it yet: Phoenix Wrong (http://www.newgrounds.com/collection/phoenixwrong.html)

Sprites + random audio = win.

Now remember kids, each entry has its rating beside the WATCH THIS MOVIE link, so if you're not supposed to watch it and do anyway, it's not my fault.

[Zeke]

You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square --
But when a crime's discovered, then <i><a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=447527&in_page_id=1770&in_page_id=1770&expand=true">Macavity's not there!</a></i>

Mark my words: this business of cats riding buses is not going to end well. They're one opposable digit from doing away with us completely.

[Hejira]

That cat's gonna stop eventually. You know why?

Tourists. People'll start riding that bus just to see the kitty cat and they'll be constantly snapping the cat with the flash, and the cat'll be all, "Screw it, I can walk 400 metres without being blinded every five seconds," only to be run over by one of those girls who keeps a dog in a purse.

[mudshark]

Mark my words: this business of cats riding buses is not going to end well. They're one opposable digit from doing away with us completely.
What's more: they've known it all along.

[Sa'ar Chasm]

Cats were once worshippded as gods. They have never forgotten this.

[Nate the Great]

Its only a matter of time before they downsize us all.

[Hejira]

...so, when the cats take over, do you reckon they'll need a translator? If so, my survival is assured.

[Zeke]

Not everyone who wants a hammer (http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2007/4/3moe.html) is planning to use it on Trip.

[PointyHairedJedi]

I don't know if this has ever been pointed out here, but there's a guy who essentially does five-minute video parodies of Yu-gi-oh that he calls Yu-gi-oh the Abridged Series. I've never read or watched or whatevered Yugioh, but I've found these to be hilarious.
http://jentsproductions.com/littlekuriboh/
I wasted more than an hour just sitting and watching those. I think the line that cracked me up the most was "It's like something out of H.P. Lovecraft, only gay!"

The cats have already taken over, you poor foolish fools. Only now, at the end, do you begin to understand.

[mudshark]

^ As I already pointed out above -- we are still here only because we amuse them.

Well, yeah, there's the whole can-opener business, obviously, but...

Not everyone who wants a hammer (http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2007/4/3moe.html) is planning to use it on Trip.

P. Yarrow
First Commerce Bank Heh heh. :D

[AKAArzosah]

In case anyone hasn't read the 'Random Fiver' thread: http://www.webpages.ttu.edu/jonray/rfiver/randomfiver.php

[Zeke]

Ever wondered how a nuclear chain reaction works? It's actually not that much like Boomshine (http://www.k2xl.com/games/boomshine/), but Boomshine is equally cool.

[Sa'ar Chasm]

Damn you, Zeke. Damn you.

Level 9 and pondering the Kinetic Molecular Theory of Gases to get to Level 10.

[AKAArzosah]

I passed level twelve! It took me about thirty tries, but I did it!

Speaking of thirty tries, it took me about that many to spell that sentence right. Ugh.

[Zeke]

It took me about twelve. There's not much skill involved in that one, really. It would take a genius to get a good enough sense of how all 60 particles are moving to formulate a strategy more complicated than "let's see if this spot works."

Two samples from the Partially-Clips-like webcomic Wondermark:
- How, I ask you? (http://www.wondermark.com/d/178.html)
- Any cat owner can vouch for this one. (http://www.wondermark.com/d/186.html)

[Nate the Great]

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/239123

This is Pretty Much Ocarina of Time, which is a Flash movie that I'm sad to say is a better parody than my fiver.

[Zeke]

Well they can't. (http://www.animalshaveproblemstoo.com/view.php?id=325)

[Zeke]

And speaking of animals, they have pillbugs on the ocean floor.

THREE-POUND PILLBUGS. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giant_isopod)

[ijdgaf]

Those things are just dog gamned creepy.

[mudshark]

And speaking of animals, they have pillbugs on the ocean floor.

THREE-POUND PILLBUGS. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giant_isopod)
That's the biggest pillbug I've ever seen! [/maxwellsmart]

[Zeke]

You mean second biggest, right?

[Hejira]

I think now would be a good time to point out that when I first saw the title of this thread, I totally had the wrong idea.

[AKAArzosah]

Me too, but I wasn't gonna say anything.

[Nate the Great]

Eww. And to think I changed my avatar right before that.

[Zeke]

I have no idea what any of you are talking about. You're all crazy. Get off the road.

Meanwhile, speaking of animals I found out about through that webcomic, here's the vampire squid from hell (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_squid). Well, okay. To be more accurate, I should give its scientific name: "the vampire squid from hell."

[Hejira]

Like other deep-sea cephalopods, Vampire Squid lack ink sacs. If threatened, instead of ink, a sticky cloud of bioluminescent mucus containing innumerable orbs of blue light is ejected from the arm tips.If it were green or pink or orange light, I'd just admire it for being able to do that, but dude. BLUE.

I want one for a pet.

[PointyHairedJedi]

THREE-POUND PILLBUGS. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giant_isopod)
Pillbugs? Interesting. I know them both as woodlice and slaters, though slater seems to be purely a Scottish thing. I endured many years of being told by my peers "They aren't woodlice, they're slaters."

They taste just the same either way, of course.

[Zeke]

When I was a kid, we called 'em potato bugs. They have many names (http://yellow5.com/pokey/archive/index100.html).

(Sigh. I still love that Pokey strip, but it was so much cooler before I knew that "master the possibilities" was an old MasterCard slogan.)

[Sa'ar Chasm]

I think we called them woodbugs. They're the little grey things the roll into an armoured ball when you poke them, right?

[mudshark]

You mean second biggest, right?
I did, actually.
Meanwhile, speaking of animals I found out about through that webcomic, here's the vampire squid from hell (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_squid). Well, okay. To be more accurate, I should give its scientific name: "the vampire squid from hell."
There were a couple of PBS programs (either Nature or NOVA) that gave a good look at these critters. Very cool.
When I was a kid, we called 'em potato bugs. They have many names (http://yellow5.com/pokey/archive/index100.html).
They do (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Woodlouse#Common_names).


And a link contribution, for whatever it's worth:

The Rules (http://www.pccoc.com/RoadKillRules.htm) for the Annual Roadkill Cook-Off (http://www.pccoc.com/Roadkill.cfm) in Marlinton, WV.

[Chancellor Valium]

They have many names (http://yellow5.com/pokey/archive/index100.html).


And they have a plan.

[Zeke]

Shyeeah, right. Their "plan" is completely ad hoc. They want to kill us all, except that they want to create a pillbug-human hybrid, except that they want to move to Earth. Their sleeper agents -- slater agents, if you will -- have no idea they're really bugs except when they do. And are we ever going to get an explanation for the giant pillbug in my head that no one else can see?

[PointyHairedJedi]

And are we ever going to get an explanation for the giant pillbug in my head that no one else can see?
Given what Baltar did with Six, I think we can all agree that that's a mental image that none of us are ever really going to recover from, Zeke.

[Nate the Great]

Ooooookkkkaaaayyyy....

Moving on. If we're going to do a thread of links...

http://www.reviewboy.com/

Delta Blues is (dare I say it?) one of the top five Trek sites that any Trekkie has to visit. It's a requirement. It's necessary.

[Zeke]

Given what Baltar did with Six, I think we can all agree that that's a mental image that none of us are ever really going to recover from, Zeke.

Zeke's Better Judgment: Actually, I think he was just insulting me.

[ijdgaf]

Have a horsey birthday! (http://www.qwantz.com/index.pl?comic=981)

[AKAArzosah]

'Slater' is an Australian thing too.

[Zeke]

Here's one for chess fans. (http://webpages.charter.net/darksky25/Chess/HumorDiversions/test.html) (Anybody here play on RedHotPawn? I'm CZeke there.)

[PointyHairedJedi]

I have a rather nice repilca set of the Lewis chessmen. I was even at one point a member of a school chess club. Before you get too impressed though, I should point out that I can count the number of opponents I've beaten on one hand.

[mudshark]

Here's one for chess fans. (http://webpages.charter.net/darksky25/Chess/HumorDiversions/test.html)
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g223/mudshark58/smilies/bgbiggrin.gif

[Nate the Great]

Fairly amusing.

That's one reason why I'm not your average nerd. I'm not a chess addict. Probably because I've gotten smacked by one too many uppity ten dollar computer programs.

[Burt]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FtKYOtOIkE

This completes me.


Seriously though, it's just perfect. I loved Spitting Image....
Oh why did you go away!

[Zeke]

That's one reason why I'm not your average nerd. I'm not a chess addict. Probably because I've gotten smacked by one too many uppity ten dollar computer programs.

I don't think chess is quite the defining nerd attribute it used to be anymore. I don't know a lot of people who play, and I'm a math grad student. The weird thing is that Metroid2002, a totally unrelated forum that Hejira and I frequent, is full of chess fans and has even organized tournaments.

But then, the appeal of chess is too universal to try and match it up with some specific group. It's the definitive strategy game. TOS and B5 showed people still playing chess 300 years from now, and I believe it.

[Nate the Great]

From what I've read, there are many better strategy games out there. Go, for example. Now, I've never played even though I know how. For that matter, what about Hexxegon?

[Zeke]

Anticipating that objection, I said definitive, not best. I think chess has a stronger claim to that title than any other game. "Best" wouldn't even make sense, since there are any number of ways one game can be better than another: simplicity, challenge, accessibility, and so on.

Go is indeed a strong contender, though I think chess edges it out. As for Hexxagon, I apply a simple rule: any game I have to look up is in no way a classic yet.

[ijdgaf]

I think the whole Go vs. Chess issue is more or less an East vs. West thing. Which you define as "definitive" largely rests on where you grew up.

I say they both co-chair their definity.

[Nate the Great]

Well, it's just that from what I've heard, if a random person had to go on a hundred-year trip across the galaxy and could only take one game with them, the odds are better that they'd take Go with them.

[Chancellor Valium]

@IJD: Exactly. In my home, for example, it was Newfoundland Trivial Pursuit...

[Zeke]

You know, we get pretty silly here sometimes. But I think it's time now to take a moment, as we sometimes do on this show, to look... into the future (http://paleo-future.blogspot.com/2007/04/postcards-showing-year-2000-circa-1900.html).

[Nate the Great]

For some strange reason, I think that the personal flying machine is the most improbable. I daresay that gliders with as little surface area as those would barely (if at all) get you to the ground from a cliff. Going up and down at would be impossible.

The personal waterwheel raft could possibly work if you added a float on each side to keep your balance.

The moving pavement is just plain loony. Possible, but there are multiple better and cheaper alternatives.

[Sa'ar Chasm]

@IJD: Exactly. In my home, for example, it was Newfoundland Trivial Pursuit...

All roight, bye, for all t'e marbles, wot koind of cawd am Oi kissin' if Oi'm takin' a shawt o' screech in t'e squid-jiggin' grounds, moi trout?

[Nate the Great]

Forty-two.

Hey, it'll answer any question! Maybe not well, but it is an answer. :)

[Hejira]

For some strange reason, I think that the personal flying machine is the most improbable. I daresay that gliders with as little surface area as those would barely (if at all) get you to the ground from a cliff.

I think one can get to the ground from a cliff without a personal flying machine.

[ijdgaf]

I thought the art of flying (or rather, the knack to flying) lay in learning how to throw oneself at the ground and missing.

[mudshark]

The moving pavement is just plain loony.
Is it?

Never read The Caves of Steel, did you?

Shame on you; go to the library. Now.


OT: Did I do this one yet?

http://www.tashian.com/multibabel/

[Zeke]

All I know is, I WANT A TRAINBOAT.

(And isn't anyone gonna say "The future, Conan?")

[Nate the Great]

@Hejira: I hope you know a good surgeon that can get this barb out of my side...

@idjaf: Kudos for you.

[ijdgaf]

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6204903272262158881

First time I watched it, didn't realize there was audio. But basically, it's just a lame voiceover. Easily ignorable.

[Thunder Phoenix]

I dunno if this has been brought to the attention here or not, but I found this (http://granades.com/2007/05/02/loltrek/) both incredibly stupid and incredibly funny.

[Zeke]

Ha! If you're familiar with lolcats, check that out. It's a hoot.

In other news, here's a fantastic article about different perspectives on digital rights (http://ansuz.sooke.bc.ca/lawpoli/colour/2004061001.php) by Matt Skala, a fellow Waterloovian. It's a bit condescending in spots, but brilliantly presented. I for one feel smarter.

[PointyHairedJedi]

You know, we get pretty silly here sometimes. But I think it's time now to take a moment, as we sometimes do on this show, to look... into the future (http://paleo-future.blogspot.com/2007/04/postcards-showing-year-2000-circa-1900.html).
A lot of those almost seem snurched from When the Sleeper Wakes, but there's so little time difference in between them that it's probably more likely to be coincidence.

[Nate the Great]

They actually have an "official pH 7.0" bottle someplace? It's water? Putting aside the fact that purified water should be relatively easy to come by, how would you keep an official water sample pure at 7.0 for very long?

Uhura: That be super cute. I take one.
Jones: It be ending up more than one. Ha ha.
Uhura/Chekov: Whut?
Jones: Never mind. I is foreshadowing.

I think that Jim Wright would enjoy this thing.

[ijdgaf]

Okay, this is just plain awesome.

watch (http://kotaku.com/gaming/mario-in-the-sky-with-diamonds/clip-mario-hooked-on-shrooms-257382.php)

[Sa'ar Chasm]

Putting aside the fact that purified water should be relatively easy to come by, how would you keep an official water sample pure at 7.0 for very long?


Keep it sealed under nitrogen or argon and never, ever, ever open it.

Which may not be very helpful if you want to use it to calibrate something.

[Zeke]

While reading something unrelated, I ran into the term "waldoes" and wondered what it meant. Turns out that waldoes are handheld devices for manipulating objects at a distance, like those claw things old people sometimes use. The term comes from a Heinlein story, oddly enough. But that's not the point.

The point is that during my search, I checked out Google Images. I expected a bunch of incorrect results involving "Where's Waldo." Was that what I got? No no, that would have made too much sense.

Here's the first page of results (http://images.google.com/images?client=opera&rls=en&q=waldoes&sourceid=opera&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&um=1&sa=N&tab=wi), which is full of -- naturally -- Spider-Man.

(It turns out this is because of the "Iron Spider (http://www.marveldatabase.com/Iron_Spider_Armor)" costume Spidey was wearing for the first half of Civil War, which had three retractable arm things. This of course explains why those images mostly show him in costumes other than the Iron Spider suit.)

[PointyHairedJedi]

If by full, you mean three, then yes. :p

[Nate the Great]

I still call it the Iron Spidey suit. I'm also still wondering what the heck Tony Stark was drinking when he put THREE waldoes onto the suit. He's SPIDER-Man, right? As in EIGHT limbs, not seven. I could grok two waldoes, I could grok four, but three? That's just freaky.

[Zeke]

Wow -- according to the hitcounter referrals, <a href="http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=What%20are%20the%20jedi%27s%20weaknesses&btnG=Search&meta=">Darth Vader just visited 5M.net</a>.

[Nate the Great]

Uh, was that link and the conclusion thereof suppose to conform to an actual application of logic?

[Zeke]

Yes, and I'm not interested in hearing whatever objection you're going to make -- "Vader already knows the Jedi's weaknesses" or whatever. I was making a joke, not proving a theorem.

In other news, Vern at AICN is seriously pissed (http://www.aintitcool.com/?q=node/32511) about the PG-13 rating of Live Free Or Die Hard. Hard to argue with him, but man, this guy takes his action movies seriously.

[Nate the Great]

Okay, you claim that "Darth Vader just visited 5Min.net." I follow the link and find a Google Search for "what are the Jedi's weaknesses?" The ninth entry on the list is the Episode Three fiver. I'm not seeing an explanation of why anyone would enter that question into Google, nor why you find it so interesting. Perhaps further elucidation would help.

[ijdgaf]

Chillax dude. It was an idle joke. Overexplaning jokes never works. Especially idle ones.

[Nate the Great]

We need to incorporate that into a fiver. "That's no idle joke..."

[Zeke]

This is very late and it's on a weird site, but it's the best commentary on Michael Richards' self-destruction (http://www.louschuler.com/archives/2006/11/cosmo_goes_psyc.html) I've read so far. Like I did, this guy found it more baffling than offensive, and his comments make a little sense out of it.

[Zeke]

Well, I'm glad someone sees the big picture. Destroying humanity is kid stuff; destroying the actual planet Earth (http://qntm.org/destroy) is hard. Ankin Rotor would be proud.

[Nate the Great]

My first smile was that he immediately nominated the Western Hemisphere (probably specifically because of the good ol' USA) to be transformed into antimatter.

On waiting for probability to spontaneously destroy the Earth:
"Note: the odds against this actually ever occuring are considerably greater than a googolplex (1010100) to one. Failing this, some kind of arcane (read: scientifically laughable) probability-manipulation device may be employed."
Hey, my name used to be Infinite Improbability, I had to enjoy this one. Don't they know all you need is a Bambleweeny 57 Sub-Meson Brain, an atomic vector plotter, and a nice hot cup of tea?

[PointyHairedJedi]

Desktop Tower Defence (http://www.handdrawngames.com/DesktopTD/) - a worryingly addictive flash game.

[Nate the Great]

The MSTing Mine:

http://www.keithpalmer.ca/msting-mine/index.html

Think MST in written form. I just found it. Good stuff.

[Hejira]

This is how Sonic learned to run so fast. Probably why he's blue, too. (http://www.weirdnewstoday.com/2006/10/man-lacerates-penis-with-hedgehog.htm)

[Zeke]

DBZ fans will wince at this one. We all know FUNimation got pretty ridiculous in censoring the anime, but seeing it all in one place (http://www.geocities.com/light_dbz/liners.htm) will still leave you reeling. (For more, this page (http://www.kanzenshuu.com/rumor/international/) on my favourite DBZ site covers the really big differences in detail -- including the infamous HFI L, which you must read about if you haven't already, DBZ fan or not.)

[Gatac]

...you have a favorite DBZ site?

Gatac

[Zeke]

Well, I have an only DBZ site. I have no idea whether the others I used to visit are still around, I just know this one's good. My favourite back in the day, of course, was the one where you could read all the manga for free. I was one of that site's last customers before it got the inevitable cease-and-desist.

DBZ was a part of my youth, and I have affection for it, despite all the goofiness. Till the day I die I'll be able to tell you all the Z Fighters' signature moves. It's like many people my age and Power Rangers, or (educated guess here, let me know if I'm wrong) you and Transformers. I'll never get into those series now -- I wasn't on the ground floor. Only a kid can get past the silly stuff.

[Gatac]

Transformers in-DEED.

Gatac

[Nate the Great]

I was a big fan of both Power Rangers (and ALL of those Saban knockoffs) and Transformers. Ah, good times. The days when the mental circuits responsible for artistic taste aren't fully formed yet.

For that matter, I'm old enough to have been a He-Man fan! Looking back, I wonder why. "Microscopic childish brain" comes to mind.

[Chancellor Valium]

Mornington Crescent (http://parslow.com/mornington), the most fascinating tube station known to man...

[Zeke]

Brian Clevinger has endorsed PC Gamer's Galactic Civilizations II blogger (http://www.computerandvideogames.com/article.php?id=161570&site=pcg) for president. And really, could Rudy or Hillary run a space empire with quite the same charming ineptness... let alone get away with naming anything You Are All So Boned?

Here's a little snapshot of this guy's GCII experience:

"I attacked. The planet turned into a ship. The ship destroyed my ship. The ship turned back into a planet."

[PointyHairedJedi]

I almost bought that last week, but went with Star Wars Galactic Battlegrounds instead. Needless to say RSI is bothering me once more.

[Nate the Great]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gIlYRJbojM0

Hilarious flash movie of the Frasier cast portraying the Voyager cast. Probably a SNL skit or the like.

[AKAArzosah]

Things like that make me wish I had broadband NOW and not in 20 FRIGGING DAYS. Well I'll get back to you in an hour or so when that has actually loaded.

[AKAArzosah]

Ha! That was great, especially the whole Niles/Daphne joke.

And look, it DID take an hour to download.

And I'll actually add a link: The Book of Biff (http://www.thebookofbiff.com/2006/01/02/4/) (I've linked to the first comic for convenience. Anyone who looks and the ads on Bob and George has probably already seen this.)

[Zeke]

It's a little-known fact that elephant-proof does not imply cow-proof (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=373196).

From the same author: hey there, blimpy boy (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=160851), flying through the sky so fancy-free...

[mudshark]

I miss the days when Straight Dope's boards weren't subscription-only.

"Elephant-proof"... ROFL

[Nate the Great]

That's awesome.

"Somewhere in the control room of my mind a fat little dwarf in a security outfit was paging through a Penthouse while smoking a cigar with his feet up on the table, watching the security monitors of my brain with his peripheral vision."

I love the fact that not only is it just a security guard, it's a DWARF security guard. He must've eaten some pizza or something before bed.

[Zeke]

Reminds you of Dave Barry, doesn't it? Some of the posters noticed that too.

(Subscription-only? I'm not registered and I can see the threads fine.)

[Nate the Great]

I'm still subconsciously sulking that Dave retired from his column in the first place. No columns mean no column compilation books.

[Chancellor Valium]

Where is the lid? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WkZ-Cogr-rM)

[mudshark]

(Subscription-only? I'm not registered and I can see the threads fine.)
I used to be registered, but as of a couple of years back (or whenever it was -- some time after I posted a link to that thread about "The Lord of the Rings, as written by well-known authors who are not named J.R.R. Tolkien"), I would have needed to pay actual cash to continue posting there. I decided against it.

[Chancellor Valium]

Hilarious website (http://www.aloha.net/%7Emikesch/monstr.htm).

[mudshark]

Skimmed it. I'll have to go back and look at it some more later, when there's not quite so much uproar going on just over my shoulder, but it looks amusing.

[Zeke]

Ah yes. It's surprising, if you don't know about it already, that Protestant fundamentalists are just as worried about Catholics' souls as they are about non-Christians'. But it's true, and they even send missionaries to heavily Catholic areas. (It doesn't go both ways -- Catholics don't agree with fundamentalists, but we don't consider them or anyone else auto-damned.) This is one reason the ecumenical movement rarely gets anywhere. One man's trifling difference is another man's irreconcilable one.

Back to links. I recently found out that YouTube has been an enormous boon to amateur comedy troupes. Here are two whose skits are absolutely hilarious: <a href="http://www.baratsandbereta.com/">Barats & Bereta</a> (picture <a href="http://www.robandelliot.cycomics.com/">Rob and Elliot</a> in live-action) and <a href="http://derrickcomedy.com/">Derrick Comedy</a> (fans of 24, you must watch the "Tom Rogers" videos).

[ijdgaf]

Perhaps not auto-damned, but last time I went to mass with my fiancee, I certainly wasn't allowed to partake in communion. Nor any other time for that matter.

(ahem)

Forget Guitar Hero (http://www.dr.dk/spil/floejtehero/popup/)

[Zeke]

More links:
TV Tropes (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HomePage) is a comprehensive and hilarious wiki of TV and entertainment clichés. Be prepared to follow way more links than you meant to.
On a similar note, it's The Grand List of Console Role Playing Game Clichés (http://project-apollo.net/text/rpg.html)! Even funnier, and highly reminiscent of the Evil Overlord List.

Reply to IJD (liturgical minutiae warning):
Okay, but that's very different from saying you're going to hell. <Liturgical minutiae> And while non-Catholics technically aren't supposed to take Catholic communion, we don't exactly sweat over it. My grandma, who's Anglican, always takes communion when she goes to my church, and my folks are iffy about it but don't think it's a big deal. Priests and eucharistic ministers don't pass you through a Catholic Detector first -- it's up to your conscience whether you receive or not. (By the same token, you sometimes see particularly devout Catholics decline to receive on a particular week because they feel they're not in an appropriate spiritual state. Most of us schlubs aren't that sensitive to ours, and again, that's okay.)

[Chancellor Valium]

^Actually, you're somewhat incorrect there, Zeke.

http://www.catholic.com/library/Who_Can_Receive_Communion.asp
http://www.catholicherald.com/saunders/04ws/ws040506.htm
http://www.catholic.com/thisrock/2003/0302sbs.asp
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Acropolis/5743/closed.html

Hope that helps :)

[Nate the Great]

I've long been fans of both of Zeke's links. They're definately worth it, but don't go to TV Tropes until you have a lot of time to dedicate to it.

I'd appreciate it if someone would PM me about why so many people are willing to accept the idea of actually eating Christ's flesh. That level of theological discussion is a little beyond the message board.

[Chancellor Valium]

The Catholic Encyclopaedia (www.newadvent.org/cathen/) - outdated, but still useful :)

[Zeke]

In the Year 2000... dogs will howl along with La Bamba? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMOTBWisl6I)

[AKAArzosah]

FiveMinute.net is BAD (http://www.pakin.org/complaint?firstname=FiveMinute.net&pgraphs=10&gender=c), mmkay? ;)

After all, Fiveminute.net is not just illogical. It is unbelievably, astronomically illogical.

[Zeke]

I knew all that support of Communism would come back to bite me.

[AKAArzosah]

Bad, Zeke, Bad! (http://www.pakin.org/complaint?title=Comdr.&firstname=Zeke&middlename=&lastname=&suffix=&gender=m&shorttype=f&pgraphs=10)

Zeke will do everything in his power to hoodoo us.

[Nate the Great]

I don't suppose anyone could give us the abridged version of that load of mumbo-jumbo?

[AKAArzosah]

Basically it's a randomly generated letter of complaint that you can set to complain about any person or company you like.

So whatever load of mumbo jumbo you got was different to all the other ones.

Key points:

I'll simply summarize by stating that FiveMinute.net discounts important principles of our culture as mere platitudes. And I can say that with a clear conscience because FiveMinute.net likes harangues that leave behind a legacy of perpetual indebtedness in developing countries.
FiveMinute.net likes to generate an epidemic of corruption and social unrest.
FiveMinute.net's list of sins is long and each one deserves more space than I have here.
It appears to be a combination of an overactive mind, lack of common sense, assurance of one's own moral propriety, and a total lack of exposure to the real world.

[Nate the Great]

Social unrest from 5M.net? "Everyone, run for your lives! Fivists with lame senses of humor are coming!" :)

[PointyHairedJedi]

Unfortunately, they're already here. :(

[Zeke]

This claims to be the funniest five-second clip on the internet (http://youtube.com/watch?v=a1Y73sPHKxw). DRAMA!

[mudshark]

Heh. Spiffy posted an avatar-size version (http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g223/mudshark58/comment/343ea71ba13fc849d5ab05e2fb9efdebf53.gif) of that a couple of weeks ago, and I can watch it over and over. http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g223/mudshark58/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif

[ijdgaf]

On a more educational note, here is a video about your changing bodies. (http://kotaku.com/gaming/clip/learn-about-safe-sex-from-the-mario-bros-271810.php)

[Zeke]

The funniest part is the plethora of dimwitted users who think it's real.

On a similar note, sex education for Metroids (http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/248990). You think humans get confused by the changes their bodies go through?

[Nate the Great]

Discussion question: how many of you learned about the word plethora from Three Amigos? Si, El Guapo!

[Derek]

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/organic_fuel.png

[Zeke]

Oh, don't get me started on xkcd. That guy makes me SO MAD. I've said before that I could have been the Websnark guy -- well, I could have been the xkcd guy even more. But noooo, he's the one giving a speech at MIT on the strength of his stick figures.

ARRRRRGH.

Also, he's one of those smug Linux jerks who are all smug and jerky about their smug jerky Linuxness. And he can't stop pointing out all the sex he's apparently had. And -- look, I acknowledge that this is spite. I love his comics; he deserves his success. But he's yet another guy who came after me and got famous doing my kind of humour. I can't help being frustrated by that.

Discussion question: how many of you learned about the word plethora from Three Amigos? Si, El Guapo!

Not me. Never seen it.

[PointyHairedJedi]

You were simply ahead of your time, Zeke.

And now? Now you're old and past it. Such is life.

[mudshark]

Discussion question: how many of you learned about the word plethora from Three Amigos? Si, El Guapo!
Not me. Never seen it.
Nor I. I knew it even before Radar took his correspondence course.

[Chancellor Valium]

I can't help being frustrated by that.

You have selected "Kosh Naranek" as your counsellor! Have a nice day!

[Nate the Great]

Minor plug for Three Amigos then. Lots of SNL alumni.

[Zeke]

Link for Zelda fans -- possibly the best one ever. I cannot begin to imagine the work that went into <a href="http://hyspace.progressiveboink.com/">HySpace</a>. All I know is it draws on every Zelda game (and others) to a degree that blows the mind of even a compulsive referencer like me, and it's a great sendup of MySpace to boot.

You were simply ahead of your time, Zeke.
And now? Now you're old and past it. Such is life.

ZIING! The extra I means extra zing!

You have selected "Kosh Naranek" as your counsellor! Have a nice day!

Oh, not him again. Our last session was no help at all. He spent the whole time going on about gerbils.

[Chancellor Valium]

Oh, not him again. Our last session was no help at all. He spent the whole time going on about gerbils.
Don't worry, we've upgraded him.

Now he either talks about ferrets or threatens that if you go anywhere beyond a radius of five miles from his immediate location, you'll die.

Or plays "stop hitting yourself" with you.

So far, he's been quite successful. Well, more successful than Neroon.

[Zeke]

You have two cows. Except they're not cows, they're pant legs (http://www.dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1779).

[AKAArzosah]

Five Minute Charlies Angels? (http://www.nytimes.com/2007/04/30/technology/30sony.html?ex=1335585600&en=a0aa68272a6e520a&ei=5090&partner=rssuserland&emc=rss)

[PointyHairedJedi]

I think it's time for Garriker to get his suing hat on (as opposed to his sewing hat, but I'm not supposed to know about that).

[Nate the Great]

http://www.virtual-bubblewrap.com/popnow.shtml

Virtual Bubblewrap, just what everybody needs!

[Nate the Great]

http://www.ericharshbarger.org/lego/portfolio.html

Since LEGO was (and is) a major hobby and interest of mine, I especially like this site. A guy named Eric Harshbarger likes to make LEGO sculptures and mosaics, both for himself and on commission.

[ijdgaf]

Wow (http://youtube.com/watch?v=aEc8v1OWeE4)

[Derek]

Man, that stop-motion is so much better than the stupid Diet Coke stop-motion they've been showing in theaters recently....

[Nate the Great]

http://www.wiihaveaproblem.com/image.php?external_image=http://www.wiihaveaproblem.com/images/p375/01.jpg

Behold the dedication of the Revolution bowler! A robot to automatically swing a Wiimote to get a strike every time! I find that to be either:

1. The coolest thing ever. Why not use every advantage (short of a Gameshark) that's available to to win a game.
2. THe most pathetic thing ever. After all, we're not talking about earning virtual gold on an MMORPG here, I'm pretty sure that all you get with Nintendo WiFi are bragging rights for winning the game.

[Zeke]

I love that thing. There's gotta be a simpler way to cheat, but who needs one?

Anyway, it's well known around here that I am a <a href="../videogames/doom.html">master of Doom humour</a>. But I'm not the master. Not by a long shot. No, the only people with any claim to that title are the makers of -- and I can't believe I didn't find out about this till now -- the 1996 promotional Doom comic (http://doomworld.com/10years/doomcomic/).

Do not read while eating. What little you manage not to spit out won't go down well.

(Spot the Frank Miller reference on page one!)

[Burt]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYduvEnJamM

Fantastic.

Battlestar opening meets DS9

[PointyHairedJedi]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtWn1aKGWkI

If I had Homeworld 2 to hand, I would so be installing this mod now.

[Nate the Great]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bulwer-Lytton_Fiction_Contest

As a fan of both Snoopy and Dixon Hill, the opener "it was a dark and stormy night" as long held a special place in my heart. Professor Rice has challenged people to come up with something even worse. You can enjoy the submitted entry at the Wikipedia page, but I have to relate the remarks of the latest winner:

Jim Guigli: My motivation for entering the contest was to find a constructive outlet for my dementia.

I think that most fivists will agree with me that this is one reason why we write fivers. :)

[NAHTMMM]

Or in my case, insanity. :)



Hmm, this sounds familiar (http://www.unitedmedia.com/comics/getfuzzy/archive/getfuzzy-20070726.html) . . . . ;)

[NAHTMMM]

Anyway, it's well known around here that I am a <a href="../videogames/doom.html">master of Doom humour</a>. But I'm not the master. Not by a long shot. No, the only people with any claim to that title are the makers of -- and I can't believe I didn't find out about this till now -- the 1996 promotional Doom comic (http://doomworld.com/10years/doomcomic/).

Do not read while eating. What little you manage not to spit out won't go down well.

o_O Are we sure Mickey Spillane didn't have a hand in putting that together . . . ?

[Nate the Great]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/One_red_paperclip

Only in a crazy world like ours could a guy barter from a paperclip up to a farmhouse in Saskatchewan in thirteen steps. I find it inspiring, and even more clever than the Million Dollar Homepage.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Million_Dollar_Homepage

[Nate the Great]

http://www.icechewing.com/

Finally! Proof that the world is doomed! An ice chewers forum? Who thought THAT up?

Hey, I'm a moderate ice chewing addict myself, but I'd never join a forum like that.

[PointyHairedJedi]

...Wow.

The paperclip story is indeed a cool one, in a very Ferengi sort of way.

[Nate the Great]

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/PartOfABalancedBreakfastStoneSoup

So I was wandering around TV Tropes and found this entry. The fact that it uses a Calvin and Hobbes strip immediately earns points, but the Dave Barry reference seals the deal, especially since I'd never heard that Barry joke before.

"Humorist Dave Barry once suggested that the commercial pitch should be, 'adjacent to this complete breakfast,' or, 'on the same table as this complete breakfast,' noting that the same claim could be made about 'a can of shaving cream, for instance, or a dead bat.'"

[Nate the Great]

http://www.blogthings.com/quickanddirtyiqtest/

I found this Quick and Dirty IQ Test quite accurate, and NO, I won't reveal what I got. ;)

[Hejira]

Bargearse. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fahf77qzEnE)

Like Yu-Gi-Oh! TAS, but done long before that. LONG BEFORE, I mean there's a Christopher Skase reference.

And that IQ test made my non-American brain fail. :(

[Nate the Great]

You remind me of the introduction to Dave Barry's book Boogers Are My Beat. Here is an excerpt. Standard disclaimers of the frailty of human memory apply:

We went through some of my older columns to see if they were worth including. What we found, quite frankly, surprised us. They were full of people that were apparently at one time quite famous, but whose names no longer ring a bell. "Al Gore," for example?

[Nate the Great]

http://www.douglasadams.se/links/

This is officially the high point of my day. Douglas Adams was a fan of Dave Barry! Is that cool or what?

[Nate the Great]

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/JustEatGilligan

I can't believe that this never occured to me. Just eat Gilligan! Read the page and you'll get it.

[PointyHairedJedi]

http://www.technosphere.game-host.org/

A site I first stumbled across many moons ago that disappeared for a while, but now has return-ed. Basically, you create a creature, and it either eats other things or gets eaten itself, and perhaps even has offspring. I promise you, you'll not be able to stop with just one...

[Nate the Great]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Y39gHihP74

Steam Trek! A great fanfilm shot in grainy black and white just like the old silent movies. It even uses those comical dialogue flashcards. The ship needs coal to keep going, so our intrepid crew must descend via ladder to a planet to get mixed up in various hijinks to save the day!

[Chancellor Valium]

That IQ test is US centred. How TF should I know about nickles and dimes?

However, I am apparently a verbal genius. Which fits - the last WAIS verbal score I got was 153.

[Nate the Great]

Whatever WAIS is.

I'd show off my ACT score, but you guys would hate my guts. More than usual, I mean. ;)

[Chancellor Valium]

Wechsler (sp?) Adult Intelligence Scale...

[Nate the Great]

You guys should read Dave Barry's spiel on those intelligence quotients Word used to give you when you ran a spelling and grammar check. You know, those things that tell you you write like a third-grader or whatever.

[Chancellor Valium]

I hate Word. Particularly the words "Passive Voice (consider revising)". What's wrong with the passive? It's not like it outlaws other abnormal forms, even - optatives, subjunctives, perfect passive participles, nominative absolutes, gerunds/gerundives (and no, I'm not sure which is which either...). Why specifically the passive?

[mudshark]

I'd show off my ACT score, but you guys would hate my guts.
Then again, it probably wouldn't mean anything at all (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ACT_(examination)#Use) to most of us. You could throw any old number out there, and without looking it up I wouldn't have an idea whether it was good, bad or indifferent.

[JVTruman]

I hate Word. Particularly the words "Passive Voice (consider revising)". What's wrong with the passive? It's not like it outlaws other abnormal forms, even - optatives, subjunctives, perfect passive participles, nominative absolutes, gerunds/gerundives (and no, I'm not sure which is which either...). Why specifically the passive?

You can go into advanced options for the spelling/grammar checker and select various components to check or not check, including 'passive voice'.

[Nate the Great]

Well, I'll tell you then. I got a 30 overall, which is 97th percentile. I graduated in the top 11 percent of my class!

[Chancellor Valium]

You can go into advanced options for the spelling/grammar checker and select various components to check or not check, including 'passive voice'.

Didn't know that. Thanks.

[mudshark]

Well, I'll tell you then. I got a 30 overall, which is 97th percentile.
Grand. Super. I got a 1230. See? Doesn't mean anything to you, does it?
I graduated in the top 11 percent of my class!
You know, if you were to ask, I'd bet that you'd find that nearly everyone here could say the same. But don't.

[Nate the Great]

Note that I used percentile as a universal measure. 97th percentile means that of 100 people who took the test, I beat 97 of them. That's darn impressive.

[NAHTMMM]

Good stuff, indeed. :)

[Nate the Great]

Well, is everyone enjoying my ever-expanding list of sig quotes? I found the MST one at TVTropes.org. Somehow I find that it applies to a LOT of fivers, and actual Trek episodes, for some reason. :cool:

[Chancellor Valium]

My motivation for reading them is to find a constructive dementia for me to inflict.

[Nate the Great]

Ugh, that grammar is atrocious.

[Nate the Great]

http://www.reviewboy.com/ravenpoem.html

Jim Wright of Delta Blues fame presents a hilarious sendup of The Raven with Seven of Nine in the Edgar Allen Poe part.

[Chancellor Valium]

Ugh, that grammar is atrocious.


If that the irony of this statement would not go unpunished!

[Nate the Great]

What, is that not proper grammar?

[KillerGodMan]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23r9iPq6opg

This happened on the way back from Boston (long story involving American History class)

I'm in there... somewhere

[Nate the Great]

http://members.cox.net/stegokitty/dsotr_pages/printable.htm

The Dark Side of the Rainbow

I still find this odd, and more than a little obsessive, but still amusing. Finding a correlation between The Wizard of Oz and Pink Floyd's The Dark Side of the Moon brings to mind that famous quote of Douglas Adams when confronted with the "6X9=42 in base 13" hypothesis: "I may be a pretty sad person, but I don't write jokes in base 13."

[Nate the Great]

http://homeonthestrange.com/phpBB2/viewforum.php?f=4

The Wish Project

As someone who's often overly obsessive with grammar, I have to give full props to these guys. They have made it their mission to create perfect wishes with no adverse side effects, just in case a genie wanders by. Some of them can get quite elaborate, but that's what it takes to get what you want from a magical being without regretting it.

[Nate the Great]

http://www.guiastartrek.com.ar/databasever.php?archivo=st8_5m.htm

Five-Minute Star Trek: First Contact in Spanish. Weird. Just weird. Was this authorized or anything, or did this Marplanauta guy just slap it up? He does credit Zeke, so it's not plagarism, but I'd have preferred a link back here.

[PointyHairedJedi]

Somebody has an account by the name here, so it's probable that it's the same guy. I'm not sure if Zeke is aware of this particular translation though, but I know from experience that you only have to link to the site somewhere to get him to pop up behind you in a most unexpected fashion, so on reflection he probably does.

[Nate the Great]

By the way, I found it by doing a search for Kablazmo, wondering if it appears in any other fivers. I guess not, huh? At least I can rest easier knowing that the Spanish translation of Kablazmo is Kablazmo. ;)

[Nate the Great]

http://web.archive.org/web/20030731092548/3sygma.com/fiveminute/scifivers/gillianofthespirits.html

So I just discovered the joys of the Wayback Machine, so of COURSE I had to go back in time to the early days of Five-Minute Voyager. Finding a Sliders fiver was, to put it mildly, shocking. Where'd it go on the current site?

[Tate]

That would be here (http://www.fiveminute.net/tv/), where all the lonely fivers of shows that don't have subsites of their own hang out.
The Wayback Machine is great, isn't it?

[Nate the Great]

Oh. Color me Hooloovoo.

I was expecially grateful for Wayback because it let me retrieve a file that one of my old glitchy jump drives ate up and I thought I'd never find it again.

It was so fun to see Five-Minute Voyager again. That seems so long ago now.

[mudshark]

The bookmark seems to have got lost in the cleanup from a spyware incident I had a few months back, but while searching for something else, I once ran across a still semi-active 5MV page on GeoCities. 'Twas a site to behold.

http://www.guiastartrek.com.ar/databasever.php?archivo=st8_5m.htm

Five-Minute Star Trek: First Contact in Spanish. Weird. Just weird. Was this authorized or anything, or did this Marplanauta guy just slap it up? He does credit Zeke, so it's not plagarism, but I'd have preferred a link back here.
If you'll recall, Five-Minute Voyager for quite a while had an alternate URL with a .ar (Argentina) country code that appeared on the main index page and elsewhere. I think Zeke's main e-mail address for a time had the same .ar tag. If I remember rightly, those were given to him in exchange for permission to publish Spanish translations of fivers on Marplanauta's site, which also contains lots of other Trek-related info and fic.

[Nate the Great]

How can you have a semiactive 5MV site? We went to 5M.net, what, three years ago? Four?

One wonders if we wouldn't have more success mirroring the current site into a few other languages. Given the fivist demographic, perhaps French would be a logical first step.

[KillerGodMan]

I suddenly just remembered something...

Didn't I create a link dump already?

I'm pretty sure I did, and called it... uh... 'Links of DOOM!' or summat along those lines

[mudshark]

How can you have a semiactive 5MV site? We went to 5M.net, what, three years ago? Four?
I don't think it's been even two years, yet, since we became 5M.net. You also misread me: it was a single page on which most of the links and images were dead, a relic left over from a time before even the 3Sygma days.
One wonders if we wouldn't have more success mirroring the current site into a few other languages. Given the fivist demographic, perhaps French would be a logical first step.
We do have a few fivers which have been translated into French. I remember one in particular being quite amusing, even though I'm far from fluent in that language.

[Nate the Great]

I must be thinking of the first time Zeke tried to change away from Five-Minute Voyager, only to conclude that it was fixed permanently into everyone's minds and was a risky thing to change. He later recanted, as we all know.

[AKAArzosah]

Didn't I create a link dump already?

I'm pretty sure I did, and called it... uh... 'Links of DOOM!' or summat along those lines

I can't find it. And I'm that bored that I looked for quite a while...

[AKAArzosah]

I LIE!

http://www.fiveminute.net/forums/showthread.php?t=596

And apparently I was the first one to post in it too...

[KillerGodMan]

I LIE!

http://www.fiveminute.net/forums/showthread.php?t=596

And apparently I was the first one to post in it too...

I thought so...

but the forum hides things from me...

[Nate the Great]

http://www.anneandgilbert.com/

This play calls itself "Canada's greatest love story." Do any Canadians out there agree with this sentiment?

[Chancellor Valium]

The Chief Defect of Henry King (http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/henry-king/)
Hildebrand (http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/hildebrand/)
Lord Lundy (http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/lord-lundy/)
Rebecca (http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/rebecca/)
On Two Ministers of State (http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/on-two-ministers-of-state/)
Matilda (http://www.poetry-archive.com/b/matilda.html)

Satire as would make even old Dua-Kheti crack a smile.

[Nate the Great]

Given that Wednesday is Talk Like A Pirate Day (and no one is likely to do anything for it this year), the least I can do is link you guys to the official Talk Like a Pirate Day song. A great tune! It's on the bottom of the TLAPD Wikipedia page:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Talk_Like_a_Pirate_Day#_note-7

[Nate the Great]

Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day! Yarrr.....

This is a great spoof movie I just found: The Ten Commandments remixed into a trailer that looks like it's for a modern high school film!

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=u1kqqMXWEFs

[Nate the Great]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:IWC_2007_Martian_Invasion_of_Earth.jpg

Can someone explain this joke to me, 'cause I don't get it.

[NAHTMMM]

The Martians are forcing the human to help them take over Earth. Rather than draw up plans for a big military battle, the guy is conducting a media campaign, betting that people will assume that "If it looks like an invasion, is reported like an invasion, and tastes like an invasion, it must be an invasion."

This is along the same lines of reasoning as disguising one's resistance HQ by putting up a sign that says "This is not a secret Cardassian rebellion headquarters" (http://www.fiveminute.net/ds9/fiver.php?ep=whenitrains).

[Nate the Great]

Oh. My assumption was that since Wikipedia (unlike tvtropes.org) is so persnickety about "notability" (whatever THAT is), simply creating a photo, blog, and an eBay sale is enough to base a wiki page on. After all, if you were allowed to create pages on anything at all, Wikipedia would quickly descend into chaos (if it's not already).

[Nate the Great]

This one just wowed me. Totally amazing.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Centennial_bulb
http://www.centennialbulb.org/facts.htm

I found this thing through Snopes.org. I'm still goggling at it. A hundred-year-old lightbulb that's been lit (more or less) continuously for all this time? Yikes. You learn something new every day.

[LtFielding]

Hopefully you all have visited this website www.fiveminute.net

www.cheese.com

The Dead Awaken (http://www.deadawaken.com/signup.php?refId=55774)

[Nate the Great]

Talk about circular reasoning. We've got a guy called LtFielding, and he's sending us a link to the site that we're already on (more or less). Suddenly it ties together jokes from two completely different Victorian authors. On the one hand, there is the inevitable "sick of cleverness" gag from The Importance of Being Earnest that Zeke and I have already driven into the ground. On the other hand, we've got the more obscure "Mr. F" gag from Sense and Sensibility. "Maybe he's a handsome lefftenant." "The elusive Mr. F." "He has no profession." Et cetera. Aud nauseum.

[NAHTMMM]

LtFielding, is that a field mouse in your avatar? Whatever it is, it's cute. :)

[mudshark]

I think it's a chinchilla, possibly Chilean.

[Nate the Great]

http://www.geocities.com/sarahlegend/fanfic/lttf.html

Legend to the Future

This is a wonderful fanfic that I just discovered, a crossover between the wonderful Richard Dean Anderson/John deLancie series Legend and the Back to the Future movies (specifically, background for BTTF III).

[Wowbagger]

Oh, don't get me started on xkcd. That guy makes me SO MAD. I've said before that I could have been the Websnark guy -- well, I could have been the xkcd guy even more. But noooo, he's the one giving a speech at MIT on the strength of his stick figures.

ARRRRRGH.

Also, he's one of those smug Linux jerks who are all smug and jerky about their smug jerky Linuxness. And he can't stop pointing out all the sex he's apparently had. And -- look, I acknowledge that this is spite. I love his comics; he deserves his success. But he's yet another guy who came after me and got famous doing my kind of humour. I can't help being frustrated by that.

Keep fighting, Zeke. You've already made a breakthrough--sort of--with the unattributed quote stolen from one of your guest writers and ripped out of all surrounding context now circulating the war-torn streets of Baghdad to make a sordid political point.

xkcd is the next step. I guarantee it. I mean, you totally could have done River Tam Beats Up Everyone (http://xkcd.com/311/).

Of course, that means closing down this website and going mainstream. But it's not like there's been a Trek fiver yet this year. It would be hard to miss it any harder than we already do.

Although I freely admit I carried the Shran apology around for days afterwards. Days. Posted it in my locker. And, you know what? The Trekkies came. And they laughed.

[Nate the Great]

http://www.ex-astris-scientia.org/inconsistencies/curiosities/milleniumfalcon-firstcontact.jpg

This link explains itself.

[AKAArzosah]

Not really....

Unless you're deliberately linking to a 'hotlink alert', in a round-about way?

But I found the relevant picture anyway.

[Nate the Great]

Okay, it did NOT look like that when I copied the link. It was a blown-up picture of a frame from First Contact. One of the art designers or something had inserted a tiny, blurry Millennium Falcon into the battle for Earth. Of course, no one would notice until the advent of frame-by-frame DVD players. It was just an in-joke that I thought was cute.

[mudshark]

I've seen that picture before, but you can't hotlink to images at EAS -- never could.

[Wowbagger]

Yeah, fool.

Let's berate Nate, because "Nate" and "berate" rhyme.

[Nate the Great]

Why can't you? We're talking about hyperlinks here, not copying.

[mudshark]

Why can't you? We're talking about hyperlinks here, not copying.

Because they don't want you to do it. They're exercising control over their content.

What an idea, eh?

[Nate the Great]

Yeah, but still...

[mudshark]

Would you like some cheese to go with that whine?

[Nate the Great]

Velveeta, please!

[Nate the Great]

http://rpgworldcomic.com/comics/20030907a.jpg

I hope you guys don't apply the moral of this comic to me.

[PointyHairedJedi]

...No, of course we don't.

[mudshark]

Velveeta, please!

"It is the cheese that never dies!"

[Nate the Great]

@PHJ: "He said in a tone of friendly condescension."
Hey, there are few things an h2g2 quote can't cover.

@mudshark: Now you've got The Song That Never Ends stuck in my head. I hope you're happy.

[Nate the Great]

http://www.p22.com/projects/mail.html

A fun series of tests for the post office. Can you mail a sheet of glass without it breaking? Will a dummy bomb get through the post office? Can you get the post office to break a law against opening mail by placing the stamps inside a clear container?

[mudshark]

@mudshark: Now you've got The Song That Never Ends stuck in my head. I hope you're happy.
Since that result was not my intention and indeed had not even occurred to me, I think I can safely say that it's your problem exclusively and not likely to cost me any sleep at all.

[PointyHairedJedi]

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, bananaphone!

Muwahahaha.

[Nate the Great]

Rachel: Well, at least you amuse each other.

[mudshark]

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, bananaphone!

Muwahahaha.

http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g223/mudshark58/smilies/bgbiggrin.gif


And who's this Rachel when she's at home?

[Nate the Great]

Okay, really obscure. Rachel Greene (I insist on the silent "e") is a character from Friends. One day she walks in on the now-married Chandler and Monica Bing. They've been arguing, but cover it up with a lame joke as Rachel enters, following it up with overly hysterical laughs.

[mudshark]

Oh. Never watched it.

[Nate the Great]

Gasp! Heathen! Burn him! Burn him!

;)